Gap between rich and poor not an issue say rich bastards

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The massive gap between the poorest peoples' lot and the vomit-inducing wealth of the world's richest isn't really important, insist representatives for the world's...

May May trigger Brexit in May? Maybe

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Theresa May today revealed her plans and a slogan for Brexit; a bitter, lonely and incontinent future with seventeen cats and no continent. The slogan...

Sex worker and fruit picker tops post-Brexit career options

5
According to a press release from the Federated Institution of Associated School Careers Officers, the Brexit Plan simplifies future British employment opportunities to sex work...

Jeremy Corbyn’s conference speech just him saying “Oh Jeremy Corbyn” for 1 hour

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Jeremy Corbyn's conference speech has been rapturously received by conference delegates. The speech consisted solely of Corbyn repeating the line, "Oh Jeremy Corbyn" for a...
Theresa May

Winning a general election easier than taking benefits from orphans says woman who took...

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Like the irritating eager new guy at work, dark Sith Lord and unelected PM, Theresa May, announced a snap general election 15 minutes before...
Average Joe

I have no idea what’s going on, says Will of the People

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The infamous Will of the People has finally been outed by Rochdale Herald researchers. His real name is Will Fallfrit, and he has opened...

Green Party suffers rectal prolapse over Swansea Tidal Lagoon go ahead

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News of the go ahead for the green energy scheme at Swansea Tidal Lagoon has set heads spinning in Right On Brighton Pavilions today. "I’ll...

Breaching FCO protocol isn’t just Priti bad, Israeli bad

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From sitting Priti to up shit creek without a Patel Former Secretary of State for International Development Priti Patel held undisclosed meetings in Israel accompanied...

More Guardian Subscriptions Cancelled Over Fresh Crossword Slur

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Following yesterday's scandal that saw literally units of enraged Scotts cancelling their subscriptions, The Guardian's simple crossword this morning poured fresh fuel onto the...

Biffer mentions bacon and thinks it’s hysterical

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Steven Faratrump from Rotherham today went on Britain First's Facebook page and headed straight to one of the thousands of anti-Muslim posts and quick...
Theresa May

Parliament email hack reveals 75% of May’s emails contain phrase “cocking fuck, what fresh...

11
Penetration of the heart of government by dodgy Russian hacker types has allowed innovative research. Statistical analysis of the government's emails has been published today...
Gays

Dead gays thrilled at posthumous pardons for jail terms and chemical castrations

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Dead gays celebrated accross the country today as the 'Alan Turing Law' was unveiled by government, effectively absolving them of wrong doing for having a...

People nobody has heard of resign from party that no longer has purpose

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UKIP, the party whose sole purpose was to foster the UK public to vote to leave the EU- which happened despite them- is apparently...
Rees Mogg

Jacob Rees-Mogg frustrated by number of GDPR messenger pigeons arriving at his dovecot

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Conservative politician Jacob Rees-Mogg is said to have been left "apoplectic" earlier today after receiving several hundred carrier pigeon messages informing him of the...
Donald Trump

Our concentration camps are safer than our schools, Trump assures Democrats

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Donald Trump has taken to Twitter today to assure Democrats in the United States Congress that the filthy concentration camps into which he's herding...

Brexiter says his raison d’être is to keep English for the english

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Brexiter Pierre Norman has spoken to the Rochdale Herald about how his raison d'être is to get England out of the EU so he...

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