Treasury seek OAP to sit in baked beans to fund Social Services
In a surprise press release, the Treasury have today revealed a novel initiative to bolster funding for cash-starved Social Services.
In the statement, Chancellor of...
Country takes pity on Ginger Labour MP
After Labour MP Jared O’Mara had his sexual fantasies broadcast for all to see, the entire country has donated to a crowdfunding page to...
Revealed! What ‘Brexit’ means.
After months of denying that 'Brexit' could be defined in terms of anything other than being 'Brexit', the Government has finally announced what, in...
American lawmakers to submerge Donald Trump in barrel of water to see if he...
It was announced today via The USA news site that Donald Trump will be immersed in a barrel of water to see if he...
Who needs firemen anyway asks DUP clad Tory government
There was anger in parliament last night as the government narrowly defeated a motion by the Labour Party to end the cap on public...
Failed withdrawal expected to lead to painful Labour
Using the withdrawal method requires a high level of self-control. Even then, the withdrawal method isn't especially effective.
On the face of it (which is...
Hillary Clinton’s ‘Human Suit’ malfunctions at 911 memorial service
The Presidential frontrunners cybernetic 'human suit' momentarily glitched at the recent 911 memorial service at ground zero yesterday, the third time this has happened...
Anarchists praise efficiency of German train network as G20 riots start on time
The German city of Hamburg is hosting the 2017 G20 summit in which world leaders come together to discuss and agree on action on...
New Minister for Loneliness reveals she’s feeling a bit lonely in Westminster
Theresa May the UK Prime Minister recently announced Tracey Crouch as new Minister of Loneliness.
Speaking exclusively to the Rochdale Herald's Political correspondent in...
Modern slavery greatest evil, says woman who supports unemployed working for free
Theresa May has announced that the worst thing in the world, after Trump's hair and Boris Johnson's gob, is modern slavery. Millions will...
May’s EU deal not binding, says idiot responsible for implementing result of non-binding EU...
The idiot whose job it is to make Brexit happen says that May's latest deal is non-binding. The latest deal, cobbled together from fudge...
Jeremy Corbyn’s conference speech just him saying “Oh Jeremy Corbyn” for 1 hour
Jeremy Corbyn's conference speech has been rapturously received by conference delegates.
The speech consisted solely of Corbyn repeating the line, "Oh Jeremy Corbyn" for a...
UK in shock as Boris Johnson steps down
The people of the United Kingdom took a collective gasp today, Wednesday 1st of April, as Boris Johnson announced he would be stepping down.
"This...
Earthlings stunned to learn the meaning of the word ‘Liberal’
Following Donald Trump's election, the entire population of Earth has completely forgotten how to use the word 'liberal'.
Despite the word meaning someone who is...
Matt Hancock adds Straw Clutching to his cv as “transferable skill”
Hot on the heels of Boris Johnson's success in the Stable Door Shutting championships, the Health Secratary, Matt Hancock has added Straw Clutching to...
Electoral Commission added to watchlist of subversive organisations
The Government announced today that, after a long and thorough review of the workings of the Electoral Commission, they have added it to the...
