People hoping absolute power will moderate narcissistic bully
Political analysts are speculating that now Donald Trump is leader of the free world his personality will metamorphose into that of a wise leader...
Jeremy Corbyn under investigation after making vicar’s daughter cry during hustings
Leftist wheat-eater Jeremy Corbyn came under fire from his own back-benchers today, after being accused of making a girl cry, and not just any...
English All Xenophobic Wankers – says Nicola Sturgeon without Hint of Irony
Nicola Sturgeon will today claim that “Godless English Imperial filth” are using Brexit as a “licence for xenophobia” and that the English “are secretly working to not be considered Wankers by absolutely everyone.”
Trump Makes Farage “Hand of the King” – Hillary to “Take the Black” &...
Following his seizure of the Irony Throne, Donald Trump has moved quickly to form his Small Hands Council.
Government announces all heroes to be paid in rounds of applause
Government announces all heroes to be paid in rounds of applause. The first decisive vote in the new session of parliament was passed yesterday...
Britain’s oldest man, Paul Nuttall, has died.
Sir Paul Nuttall, VC, OBE, Ph.D, passed away peacefully in his sleep yesterday, hours before his 108th birthday.
Sir Paul was the first man to...
Theresa May to be replaced by heavy slow moving rain shower
“Rain shower means rain shower."
EU offers bribe of better UK weather if we remain
The European Union, desperate for the UK to remain, have said that the proposed European Standard Weather system due to come into operation early...
CABINET RESHUFFLE – Boris Johnson becomes Health Secretary
Theresa May's eagerly anticipated cabinet reshuffle has begun.
In what some would describe as "a bit of a surprise", the former Mayor of London and...
Millionaires ‘very sorry’ following £70,000 fine
A political party full of millionaires has said that the huge £70,000 fine they received for breaking electoral rules will really teach them a...
Tommy Robinson converts to hipsterism in prison, plans to open falafel stand in Shoreditch
Far-right garden gnome impersonator Tommy Robinson has revealed that he has become a hipster in prison and plans to open an organic falafel stand...
Prime minister says, “Boris Johnson is not undermining me, I’m doing it all on...
The woman who thinks she's British prime minister stated clearly today, and repetitively, “Boris Johnson is not undermining me, I'm doing it all on...
Every Brit to get UKIP voting Mother In Law before Brexit
In a move designed to strengthen the government's hand before Brexit negotiations begin in earnest, every British family is to be assigned a UKIP...
May red faced after failure to personally deliver EU nationals deportation letters
The Office of the Prime Minister Theresa May served up a rare slice of humble pie as Ms May apologised for not personally handing...
Trump finds Rory McIlroy’s head in bed after throwing Koch off Golf Course
President-Elect Donald Trump has denied evicting the proper billionaire, libertarian gun nut and political financier behind the Tea Party, David Koch, from his exclusive...
Hammond to tour UK comedy circuit with budget routine
After recently testing his new material in Parliament, Chancellor Philip Hammond has decided to take his own brand of political comedy "on the road."
His...
