Boris’ Barney buggering off says barber
In a hair raising exclusive, The Rochdale Herald has discovered the secret to the frankly unhinged character of the Foreign Secretary, Boris Johnson is...
Lib Dem election breakthrough as Tim Farron recognised in Tesco Express
The Liberal Democrats are said to be heartened by the progress they've made in this election campaign after reports that a member of the...
KKK David Duke polling better with black voters than Donald Trump
In news that feels like it should be satire but is in fact oddly true, Dr David Duke, the Grand Wizard of The Ku...
Jacob Rees-Mogg descended from German immigrants genieologists confirm
Plans by eccentric far right conservative politician Jacob Rees-Mogg to be elected leader of the Conservative party have been delivered a body blow as...
Remain camp optimistic about outcome of second referendum following forecasts of harsh winter
Reports of a harsh winter allied with a fuel crisis has buoyed hopes of remaining part of the EC.
Remain campaigner Frank Anwalther said "We...
We didn’t hack Paul Nuttall claims hacker group Anonymous
"We didn't hack Paul Nuttall" claims anarchistic hacker group Anonymous, as they moved to deny claims that it had hacked the UKIP leader and...
Antarctical 50 signed, Bergxit means Bergxit
Today an area four times the size of London has broken away from the Antarctic landmass. It is a worrying example of rising sea...
White House confirms all its press staff do coke
The White House has admitted today that all its press staff do coke.
The admission comes after the latest mouthpiece for President Trump, Mr Scaramucci,...
UKIP Needs Image Change, Says Rest of UK.
The UK has today agreed with former UKIP leadership challenger Suzanne Evans when she said the party needed an image change. Preferably to a...
Sun exposes Cable as Strawberry fool
Liberal democrat leadership candidate "SIR" Vince Cable has been left looking a plum strawberry fool after his claim that Britain was running out of...
Universities to charge £4K a year for fruit picking courses to prepare students for...
In proposals aimed to meet the agricultural sector’s labour needs post Brexit universities will be allowed to charge up to £4K a year for...
It’s a Global Thing, insists Brexit economist
Rochdale financial expert and three times bankrupt Brexit economist Ivana Sendham-Bach claimed today that the announcement that the UK was about to enter a...
“We can’t stop Brexit without a strong opposition”, says old hippy who keeps forgetting...
Jeremy Corbyn has taken time out from his busy schedule of avoiding anybody not singing, "Oh, Jeremy Corbyn" to prove he's still alive and...
New UKIP leader had hypnotherapy to stop him saying “I”m not a racist, but”...
UKIP’s press officer Ms Gline Garafe reassured a nervous nation today by stating that UKIP’s new leader has undergone hypnotherapy to stop him saying...
Soon to be estranged husband proposes ‘transitional sexual union’
Under the suggested terms of the deal, Britton, 34, would remain in the family home for up to a further two years, and would be entitled to avail himself of all the sexual benefits associated with a normal marriage.
Rochdale man who’s never voted pledges to ‘bring down Torie scum’ by voting Green
Gareth Thundlestick from Scumsunk crescent, Rochdale, said he became politically active after ruining the suspension on his 1986 Ford Capri whilst negotiating a pothole too fast.
"That...
