Vazeline Intensive Care
Labour MP Keith Vaz, who recently quit as Chair of the Home Affairs Select Committee is claimed to have claimed that there was nothing...
Chequers agreement shreds itself
Michel Barnier has revealed that the sole copy of the latest version of the Chequers agreement shredded itself in his office yesterday.
"I popped out...
Beleavers still think they’re in with a chance of another Referendum
Since June 23 Brexiters led by an enraged Nigel Farage haven't stopped moaning about the majority vote for Britain to remain in EU.
"I don't...
Barrymore seeks planning permission for bigger pool after High Court throws out Blair war...
It is being reported that Michael Barrymore is all set to appeal to the High Court for planning permission for a second swimming pool...
Picture yourself in their shoes
A picture of Omran Daqneesh, the five year old boy who was pulled from the rubble that used to be his home in Aleppo,...
“Are we middle class?” Ask champagne swilling corbynistas
A group of friends from Rochdale have come to the horrible realisation that they maybe middle class.
Julian "Trotsky" Bennett told us, "We're committed to...
Government votes to go on holiday early after solving all UK’s problems
Members of parliament have overwhelmingly voted to bring their summer break forward as a reward for having solved all of the UK's problems.
The...
UKIP policy committee accidentally executes itself
UKIP's national policy committee has accidentally hanged itself following the launch of its new policy demanding that under aged girls from "risk groups" be...
Lib Dem election breakthrough as Tim Farron recognised in Tesco Express
The Liberal Democrats are said to be heartened by the progress they've made in this election campaign after reports that a member of the...
Jeremy Corbyn crowned 2016 House of Commons Hide and Seek Champion
Jeremy Corbyn has won this year's Parliamentary Hide and Seek championship, after only emerging after everyone had stopped looking.
“You’ve got to give the Morning...
Blitz spirit redefined as refusing to get off bus because somebody has a milkshake
Nigel Farage has confirmed that when he or his party talk of 'the Blitz spirit' he is referring to the act of cowering on...
Emails found on MP’s pornhub viewer
A forensic investigation of Damian Green's computer has revealed that it was used for viewing emails, conducting research and processing documents, confirming that...
Nigel Farage launches leadership challenge
Less then 24 hours after fewer than half of UKIP members voted for part time Ronnie Wood lookalike Diane James to be their new...
Keith Vaz to chair Parliamentary Select Committee for online porn regulation
News is reaching us from the House of Commons that Keith Vaz has been selected to chair the online porn regulation select committee.
It is thought he...
Pensioners advised to burn BBC licence fee fines to keep warm this winter
The government, breaking a manifesto promise, has facilitated the scrapping of the free TV license for over 75s from 2020.
"My pension doesn't cover the...
White House confirms all its press staff do coke
The White House has admitted today that all its press staff do coke.
The admission comes after the latest mouthpiece for President Trump, Mr Scaramucci,...
