Brutus advises senators to get behind Caesar
Marcus Brutus has urged the Roman senate to show support for their leader Julius Caesar.
Addressing the press at a conference outside the Senate, he...
May’s EU deal not binding, says idiot responsible for implementing result of non-binding EU...
The idiot whose job it is to make Brexit happen says that May's latest deal is non-binding. The latest deal, cobbled together from fudge...
UKIP elect Diane James leader
UKIP have elected Diane James as their new leader.
Apologies for our previous article that featured Mick Jagger from The Rollong Stones.
Our intern Douglas has...
Boris Johnson shocked to discover British Empire no longer contains Canada
Foreign Office officials have confirmed that Boris Johnson has finally accepted that the British Empire no longer contains Canada, more than a year after...
Police Commissioner Confirms Police To Desist From Arresting People Doing Nothing Wrong
South Yorkshire Police Commissioner Adam Spillings went on record today as saying his force would no longer be arresting tree campaigners for doing nothing...
Specsavers Official Sponsors Of WWIII
Specsavers has announced it has signed a two-year deal as official sponsors of the forthcoming World War Three, with effect from mid November. The company...
Britain First Demands Mornington Crescent Be Renamed Mornington Cross
“If they want to have religious symbol in the name, they should rename it Mornington Cross, a proper Christian symbol, much more British,” Golding said.
Foreign words banned from entering English language March 2019
Foreign words already resident in the native tongue, like Welsh ones, will be allowed to remain after England (and the others) exit the EU.
Trump and Putin plan the partition of Poland
It’s been revealed that American President Donald Trump and Russian President Vladamir Putin have agreed to partition Poland between their two countries.
Both leaders...
Dumpster fires unhappy about comparisons to US Democracy
Skip fires around the world have declared they are unhappy with being compared to the US democratic process.
Pound hitting 8 year low nothing to do with Brexit Professor at University of...
Professor Cliff Edge has been quick out of the blocks today to reassure the public that the pound hitting an eight year low against...
Height supremacists promise New World Order will be with us shortly
Growing support for alt-height movement Height Supremacists have a new doyen in the shape of Sixtus Rees-Mogg. Rees-Mogg initially attracted support with a very modern...
Rochdale man jumps off cliff and blames friends not believing he could fly for...
A Rochdale man who sustained life threatening injuries after he jumped off Beachy Head has blamed his injuries on his friends not believing he...
Liam Fox Claims UK First in Queue for Scottish Trade Deal
Liam Fox has sparked rumours that the Scottish Independence Referendum planned for 2018 was a foregone conclusion this afternoon.
The furore began when Mr. Fox...
Labour Conference to go ahead as Dennis Skinner with baseball bat confirmed as security
The Labour Party have announced that their conference will go ahead despite G4S laughing in their faces when begged to supply security.
"We are sorry...
Farage in critical condition after massive overdose
Nigel Farage is in a critical condition this morning after taking a colossal irony overdose.
