Sturgeon Scotland Indyref Goes to Defcon Fandouble-Dozi

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Nicola Sturgeon has told Theresa May that she is not "bluffing" on the promise of a second independence and has gone to Defcon Fandabidoubledozi! In...

We want to control our own borders! As long as our borders stay in...

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Today small minded people up and down the land were in uproar as rumours that the cheese eating surrender monkeys want the English border...
Ivanka and Donald Trump

Ivanka says: I Could Be The Pretty President After G20 Power Play

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Speculation is rife in Washington D.C. that Ivanka Trump is pondering throwing her hat in the ring for the 2020 Presidential election circus.    After...

Boris “getting Coronavirus done”. PM tests positive.

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The Rochdale Herald can confirm that the Prime Minister of the UK, Boris Johnson, has tested positive for Coronavirus. Having been tested for Coronavirus on...

Corbyn warned to Beware the Ides of March

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Jeremy Corbyn, twice elected leader of the Labour party has been warned by a soothsayer to "Beware the Ides of March". It comes days after the...

We must stick to our principles, says woman not sticking to her principles

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Former Remain campaigner and comedy Prime Minister impersonator Theresa May told the British people that it's really important to stick to your principles shortly...

Britain leaves E.U. in last night’s dress and no tights

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At 6.30 this morning, Britain hailed a taxi while attempting to wipe off the worst of last night's make-up, confident in the knowledge that...

Trump gives world a ‘pearl necklace’ as withdrawal does not stop emissions

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President Donald J. Trump will keep his promise not to come in the world’s mouth and insisted he would squirt his emissions onto the...
Trump Bed

Is Trump as well hung as May’s Parliament?

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Hard on the heels of the revelation that President Donald Trump has fake Time Magazine covers hanging on the walls of his golf course...
Blue Passport

Passports to be made in France as British firm De La Rue ruled out...

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Home Office confirms Franco-Dutch firm Gemalto will make Bleu passports. Controversy struck the UK this week after a mix up at the Home Office led...

Pet lovers left feline annoyed by introduction of Cat Licenses

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Today the government announced the controversial plan to tax all cat owners by making cat licenses mandatory. The move could bring a much needed £89...

Davis defends sub Euro pound

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Minister for Brexiteers, David Davis, has reported that people only getting 90 cents to the Pound is proof that everything is going well...

Paul Golding’s Prison-a-thon raises £5,000 for The Refugee Council

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On an uncharacteristically serious note we'd like to thank each and every person who has donated or otherwise supported Paul's campaign for The Refugee Council.

Boris tweets ‘I’m safe’ after car crash interview

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Britain's comedy foreign secretary, Boris “The Bewildered” Johnson, is lucky to be alive and well, tweeting “I’m safe!” just moments after his disastrous interview...

Theresa May Reads A Christmas Carol Backwards To Give It A Happy Ending

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It's one of the most famous stories, if not the most famous, in the English language. It's been made into countless films, plays and...
Ballot paper

Labour to campaign for Liberal Democrats in June 8th General Election

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Diane Abbott was resurrected this afternoon to speak to a journalist of sorts, on the BBC. Ms Abbott used one of her last possible...

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