Owen Smith has caused another Labour controversy in parliament after beating off hundreds of boys in an attempt to pull his wife.

Mr. Smith told The Herald;

“I had to literally beat off literally hundreds of young boys at school in order to prove to Liz just how sexy I am. My wrist is still sore but I pulled her in the end. That’s why I should be in charge; I’m great at beating off the competition.”

Keith Vaz, who recently left his role as chair of the Home Affairs Select Committee, is thought to be considering throwing his hat into the ring after learning that he is over-qualified for the role.