Other News

Donald Trump is to embark on a lengthy world tour in January, to ensure he can insult world leaders who don't follow him on Twitter. A White House spokesperson announced the news...

Non-stick coating manufacturer Teflon has today announced a lucrative tie in with Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson. The company is believed to have lined up an Ad campaign featuring the befuddled minister throwing buckets of shite...

Fears are growing for the safety of shiny mannequin Peter André, after he failed to appear on the cover of this month's OK Magazine. Concerned readers had to make do instead with an...

ISAs have today claimed responsibility for millions of pounds of lost UK tax revenue A Scottish widow looks moodily into the camera like she wants you to help her plan for a prudent future, her...

In response to the recent awful church shooting, the question has to be, why can’t everyone have guns? If everyone was armed this wouldn’t have happened. We need guns in our pockets. We need...

The readership of Britain's newspapers say they're confused that the papers aren't being more assertive in calling for tax reform. Right wing press connoisseur, Cliff Edge told us, "Usually my newspaper starts mobilising a mass...

East London charity shops are preparing for a bumper delivery of training kit and promotional items after West Ham appointed David Moyes to their bed-next-to-the-door Manager role. Moyes, who has come to specialise in...

Some bloke that you sort of remember from the 1990's but you can't really remember why has stepped up his irrelevance by announcing a new name for himself to his Twitter following of junior...

Following recent reports that members of the cast of inexplicably popular BBC "comedy" Mrs Brown's Boys have funds stored in offshore tax havens, The Rochdale Herald has learned of more allegations in relation to...

The UK Parliament's Committee on Standards has announced plans to require all male MPs to wear oven gloves whenever they attend the building. The Committee was forced to act in the wake of allegations of...

The latest sex scandal to hit the presses involves Damien Green using pornography at work. The de facto Prime Minister-in-waiting appears to have tossed away his chance to lead the country. Green has vowed...

Former Rochdale Momentum leader, Robbie Tomlinson, whose real name is Stuart Taxley-Gibbon, has admitted today that Jeremy Corbyn, leader of the Labour Party, is a bit shit. Tomlinson, 31, from Ramsbottom, who stood down from...

The United Kingdom is in shock this week after an all-party think tank found that power hungry arseholes of all political persuasions are also pervy fuckers. A slew of allegations of sexual misconduct hit both...

Privy Councillor and former Tory MP Ann Widdecombe has been suspended from the Conservative Party after shocking claims of historical abuse and inappropriate conduct were made last night. Miss Widdecombe was a contestant in...

It seems that testing conditions, designed to mimic working in an average open plan office space, may have coloured the subjects' results. "It wasn't that their neutral faces were 'bitchy', just that even within a short time of meeting us, they were already just sick of our shit."

David Walliams has, in a stunning show of hypocrisy and with no hint of irony, claimed that celebrities are over-rewarded as he accepted an OBE which was awarded for nothing other than partaking in...