Other News

The Daily Mail has today announced that school pupils in England should be taught anatomy using the dead bodies of their previously living teachers. In an article entitled, 'Let our teachers be heros' ...

After spending several weeks in his room, claiming to be "revising" legislation, the PM has finally been told to put his Johnson down.  "Stop proroguing this instant, Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson," Lady Hale...

In sensational news today David Duke, the former head of the Ku Klux Klan, has withdrawn his support for Republican Presidential Candidate Donald Trump.

A local man is in a critical but stable condition at Rochdale General Infirmary after accidentally driving off a bridge into the River Roch this afternoon. Steve Dickinson (39 and a half) was on his...

Carwyn Jones has changed his mind on Welsh Independence after Gareth Bale’s new contract doubled the GDP of Wales.

Nobody, who is the shadow secretary of state for Northern Ireland, claimed today that, had he been Labour leader, Labour could have won the election. He then backtracked and said that Corbyn was the best...

Jeremy Corbyn gleefully whistled whilst spreading marmalade across his toast this morning, as a result of Monarch airline going bust, according to his neighbour. Burt Monroe, long time neighbour of the staunch republican and PM...

Die hard Britain First members have today confirmed that there is absolutely no point in trying to get them to change their opinions by showing them truth, or using logic and reasoning. We spoke...

The technical gods at The Rochdale Herald have built a very special daily newsletter that goes out every few days by email. If you want to see the Rochdale Herald's short stories, satirical news and...

Southern announced today that the endless years of appalling service were over. "We've been building to this moment." Someguywhohatespeoplesaid. "And today I can announce that we're replacing all our trains.” It seems the move was prompted by reports...

Following the news today that the government of the United Kingdom will shortly be raising the retirement age to 168 years old Bruce Forsyth has announced that he is excited to soon be old...

Research has found that the average bloke considering buying his wife lingerie this Christmas should probably not. "For a start, most blokes buy scarlet nylon things that no woman who already has a bloke would...

The secret of Press Secretary Sean Spicer's propensity for hyperbolic bullshitacity has been revealed.  He has reportedly been wearing a revolutionary new type of asbestos underwear to protect his gonads from incineration during press conferences. As...

John Rant, an out of work shopping trolley attendant and EDL member from Rochdale, has once again taken to social media to claim there is no such thing as a moderate Muslim. Despite the fact...

A study has proven that any one wire left unattended for 5 minutes, will tangle itself beyond the laws of physics.  The physics department of Rochdale Community University under lead scientist Professor Duane Dibbley, carried...

A rearranged summit between Donald Trump and Kim Jong Un will take place on Love Island.  The news comes amid speculation that a high ranking military official from North Korea is visiting the US in...