Rochdale Herald guide to the top ten books to read before you die
At the Rochdale Herald it's all about mindfulness and self improvement in January.
In that spirit, we take a look at 10 books you should...
Blitz spirit will see us through says man panic buying sanitary towels and Quinoa
The UK's Health Secretary, Matt Hancock, has likened the nation's handling of the Coronavirus pandemic to the "Blitz spirit" which saw plucky Brits through...
Asian family enjoying post night out curry accused of ‘Cultural Appropriation’
A British-Asian family came under intense fire today, after being accused of extreme 'cultural appropriation' from White groups, for enjoying a post pub curry...
What to do when your dog dies in your hot car
Summer is here and forecasters are predicting a heatwave in the coming weeks. With temperatures expected to hit 30oC the country will be awash...
Liberal man escapes Wetherspoons seconds before Brexit seems appealing.
A liberal man has spoken today of his horror at being seconds away from becoming a Brexiteer.
Near-victim Webastian Sliesel told our reporter Sebastian Wiesel...
‘Research confirms Coffee holds key to immortality’
There was good news for caffeine drinkers, addicts & nervous twitchers throughout the multiverse today, as stunning new research sensationally revealed that coffee holds...
Northerner brings Kraft Slices to cheese and wine party in Surrey
A disgraced Northerner has been barred from ever returning to the South, after he humiliated his sister at a bourgeoisie Cheese & Wine evening...
Nothing says f*** you to a neighbour like a Leilandii hedge
Scientists at Rochdale College have discovered that nothing gets the message that you hate them across to your neighbour's more than a Leilandii hedge.
Dr...
I don’t shave cos I’m a Gillette John, claims Heil Vis clad Neon Nazi
Shaving that's a little too aggressive, or done with dull blades, can produce irritants which can form a rash right round your Parliament area. ...
Couple spend entire evening on Netflix before deciding what film to watch at 1am
Johnny and Mary (not real names) are just your average suburban dwelling couple who work hard on the weekdays and like to relax in...
Wankers now the majority of the public, scientists conclude.
A newly published report shows that 55% of the British public are tossers.
Professor Onan Offtherist from the Rochdale Institute of Masturbatory Studies told us...
Man considering buying his wife lingerie for Christmas almost certainly shouldn’t.
Research has found that the average bloke considering buying his wife lingerie this Christmas should probably not.
"For a start, most blokes buy scarlet nylon...
Complete sadist buys 2 year old nephew a keyboard for Christmas
A man from Rochdale has bought his nephew the gift of music for Christmas.
Stan Still told us, "I've played in bands since I was...
Gillette admit razors not suitable for sensitive skin
International razor brand Gillette has admitted that after years of investment, their product is not suitable for the delicate skin of the modern day...
Scientists confirm autocorrect was inverted by a cult
A group of scientists have today confirmed what we have all long believed, that autocorrect was inverted by a cult.
Professor Gerald Wiley spoke to...
Theresa May urges parents to ‘eat their children’ given current political situation
Theresa May urges parents to 'eat their children' given current political situation.
Prime Minister Theresa May has urged British parents to "eat your children" claiming...




















































