Significantly lower brain function can lead to heading footballs, scientists reveal

0
Scientists have revealed that significantly lower brain function can lead to being a footballer. Researchers said they had identified "significantly lower levels of brain function"...

University of Burnley to offer a degree course in Fruit Picking.

0
As part of the government's recently launched Fu*k Business initiative, the University of Burnley is offering a 5 Year degree course in fruit picking,...

Left wing politics should be kept out of schools, say right wing parents

0
People who are quite happy to have their kids going to schools where the armed forces recruit, monarchy is glorified and the status...
Young Couple

Middle class parents convert to Satanism after local cult school gets glowing Ofsted report

0
Local couple Rupert and Penelope Mills have reportedly converted to Satanism in order to get their children into the local cult school after it...

Kindergarten of Common Sense to offer clear path way into School of Hard Knocks,...

0
There was fantastic news for around 52% of the country today, as the famous School of Hard knocks officially announced their brand new subsidiary...

Britain fails GCSE Economics, Business Studies, French, German, Spanish and History

0
Great Britain was disappointed to learn that she has completely failed GCSE ecomomics, business studies, history, French, German and Spanish today. While GCSE pass rates...

Scientists Prove Fake News Caused by “A lack of bullying in schools”

0
Scientists believe they have proven the rise of Fake News is a direct consequence of the decline of bullying in schools. Professor Andrei Clewsov of...

Community schools plan morning assemblies in Mosques

0
Community schools are to hold mandatory morning assemblies in Mosques across the borough, it has been announced. Rochdale Council made the announcement earlier today, releasing...
Theresa May

Only a grammar truth in May’s PMQs

0
In this week's PMQs Jeremy Corbyn, the corduroy communist leader of what's left of the Labour Party (see what I did there?), asked Theresa...
Oxford

Elitist Oxbridge totally to blame for educational standards, says Department of Education

0
Look, an elephant, go on, shoot the elephant Oxbridge, as we all well know, is a pair of incredibly elitist and stuffy institutions, full of...
Scientists

Scientists announce new Corbyn scale that measures inactivity

0
Scientists have devised a new unit to measure inactivity that they're calling the Corbyn. Professor Frederick Seddon of Rochdale College told us, "We've been trying...

Corbyn electoral commission investigation for bribing one million media studies students

Jeremy Corbyn has apparently been put under investigation by the electoral commission after reports emerged that he has allegedly offered one million arts, drama and media studies students tax free bribes of £50,000 each to vote for the Labour Partyp
Philosopher

Shock as major philosopher is revealed to be a prankster

0
Didier Noyu, who identifies as an‘Anarcho-Realist’, admits to making up schools of thought for shits and giggles. “My latest one was ‘meta-post-structuralism’,” Noyu writes...

Terrify your neighbours with The Original Trumpkin

0
Make your own Original Trumpkin! Have you ever wanted to scare the bejeezus out of your neighbours on Halloween? Finally you have you chance with...
Corbyn

Dropping out of University should be affordable for everyone says University dropout

0
Jeremy Corbyn will today lay out his manifesto pledge to make dropping out of university courses affordable for everyone. He will tell supporters that, under...
Bubble Wrap

Bubble wrap producers report record sales as schools prepare for new year

0
As pupils prepare to merrily go back to school their parents are preparing for the big celebration. In recent years, parents have been edging ever-closer...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts