Community schools plan morning assemblies in Mosques
Community schools are to hold mandatory morning assemblies in Mosques across the borough, it has been announced.
Rochdale Council made the announcement earlier today, releasing...
Rochdale discovered to be genius hotspot
Online tests have revealed that the majority of Rochdale residents have above genius IQ levels with the town having an average score of 132.
The...
Waterloo Road Grandma School Farce
A crisis has arisen in a Rochdale school after a Chinese whispers cock up of epic proportions went much further than any sane person...
Terrify your neighbours with The Original Trumpkin
Make your own Original Trumpkin!
Have you ever wanted to scare the bejeezus out of your neighbours on Halloween? Finally you have you chance with...
Love Thy Neighbour and Till Death do us Part set to get reboots.
The BBC and ITV have both announced this week that they intend reviving certain 'classic' 70's sitcoms because of the current fashion for being...
Daily Mail demands children be taught anatomy using dead bodies of their teachers
The Daily Mail has today announced that school pupils in England should be taught anatomy using the dead bodies of their previously living teachers....
A-Level students celebrate being just three years away from £30,000 debt and a zero-hours...
Students across the country celebrated today as they received the exam results needed to springboard them into a lifetime of insurmountable debt and soul-crushing...
Scientists Prove Fake News Caused by “A lack of bullying in schools”
Scientists believe they have proven the rise of Fake News is a direct consequence of the decline of bullying in schools.
Professor Andrei Clewsov of...
Government Set to Outlaw Prime Numbers
In a surprise announcement this morning, it has emerged that the Government has released a White Paper aimed at criminalising the use of prime...
Terror in the skies Part 2
The editor of The Rochdale Herald was left horrified aboard a flight to Rhodes yesterday after reading an article in a copy of The Telegraph...
OED announces Word Of The Year
The Oxford English Dictionary announced the winner of their prestigious Word Of The Year competition at a champagne gala ceremony in London's upmarket Neasden...
Only a grammar truth in May’s PMQs
In this week's PMQs Jeremy Corbyn, the corduroy communist leader of what's left of the Labour Party (see what I did there?), asked Theresa...
Britain fails GCSE Economics, Business Studies, French, German, Spanish and History
Great Britain was disappointed to learn that she has completely failed GCSE ecomomics, business studies, history, French, German and Spanish today.
While GCSE pass rates...
Significantly lower brain function can lead to heading footballs, scientists reveal
Scientists have revealed that significantly lower brain function can lead to being a footballer.
Researchers said they had identified "significantly lower levels of brain function"...
OUTRAGE as Middle Eastern immigrant cast as Mary in school nativity play
A Rochdale primary school has come under fire from parents for casting a 9 year old Palestinian immigrant as the virgin Mary in the...
World book day sparked hate incident
An unfortunate faux pas occurred yesterday at St Timothy's primary school in Rochdale.
Gareth Brown, a year 5 pupil was sent home after arriving at school...


















































