Didier Noyu, who identifies as an‘Anarcho-Realist’, admits to making up schools of thought for shits and giggles.

“My latest one was ‘meta-post-structuralism’,” Noyu writes via encrypted email. “It means absolutely nothing, and I applied it to an argument that basically disappears up its own arse. I coined it last Sunday, and it was being used the next day by the quality press in their reviews of Ed Sheeran’s closing set at Glastonbury.”

Noyu has a long history of spoofing the press. One of Noyu’s more famous creations is ‘post-ante-pre-post-modernism’.

“That was a good one,” admits Noyu. “It is used to describe a work of art that is clearly very important but equally clearly impenetrable. The Guardian falls for it every time.”

Noyu is frequently employed by modern artists from many fields to provide a suitable description for their gruesome brainfarts.

“It all started when I described one of Karlheinz Stockhausen’s late works as ‘meta-revisionist’. It was totally unlistenable-to, a conglomeration of discordant fragments and random noises, but Stockhausen wanted people tolove it. So I called it meta-revisionist. Wanky arts correspondents every where seized upon it, like so many dogs to a bone, and gave the piece glowing reviews.”

The Rochdale Herald has, thus far, escaped Noyu’s sophisticated mockery. He (or she) has resisted all attempts to recruit him (or her) to write for the Herald. Didier Noyu is clearly a pseudonym. He/she has been dubbed ‘Philosophy’s answer to Banksy’ and has been variously identified as Geri “Ginger Freud” Freud, Boris Johnson, and as some blokecalled Rob.