Scientists have devised a new unit to measure inactivity that they’re calling the Corbyn.

Professor Frederick Seddon of Rochdale College told us, “We’ve been trying for some time to come up with a measure of inactivity. We have the Becqurel and Curie for activity but there’s loads of particles that don’t do anything of any consequence. This scale we’re calling the Corbyn scale.”

Seddon revealed that when asked what name they most associated with inaction the public unanimously said Jeremy Corbyn.

Seddon told us, “We wanted a name that people could relate to. It’s important that people can connect to science so we’re calling it the Corbyn.”

It’s understood that there are plans to name a new particle the Corbyn. Seddon told us, “Scientists at CERN recently discovered a particle that sits on the fence. It floats around not doing very much but loads of particles are inexplicably attracted to it despite all the evidence suggesting it’s totally useless.”

Fact checked by Snopes; Plagiarised by Andrew Neil; Nancy Sinatra's favourite Rochdale satirist; sued by Chris Froome and winner of the 1922 Nobel Prize for Chemistry.* *Not all of these necessarily true.