Children have been told that GCSE’s will be of no use in the coming land war with the robots.

The education Secretary Justine Greening has revealed her plan to back what she calls “more realistic vocational training” for future school-leavers.

“As we all know, the idea of living in a society where anyone and everyone can just go and get an education for nothing is clearly a socialist fantasy, and a costly one at that – what I am proposing is far more vocational training, skills that will actually come in useful after Brexit.”

“Real skills like field-stripping a Phased Plasma rifle (in the 40W range) or establishing effective strafing patterns with a mini-gun, like Blain off of Predator. Along with the need for computer-related skills, we’ll be funding courses in logic-bombing rogue A.I.’s, and also grass-roots level, traditional tech skills like re-programming T-1000 units for last-ditch time-travelling antics.”

“Let’s be clear, while the smokescreen of immigrants, terrorists and religious fundamentalism has worked well so far, it’s becoming obvious that the real invader stealing your job here is the bloody robots, so let’s take real steps to make sure that, as a country, we’re ready for what comes next.”

Children are being told to listen, and understand that these robots are out there, that they can’t be bargained with, they can’t be reasoned with, they don’t feel pity or remorse or fear and will absolutely will not stop ever.

And that’s just our government let alone the murderous shape shifting, time travelling armoured killer cyborgs from the future.