Jeremy Hunt victim of cruel nominative determinism sting operation
?UK health secretary Jeremy Hunt has fallen victim to a cruel nominative determinism sting operation perpetrated by an East European cockney rhyming slang gang,...
Traffic chaos as ALF steal M62 cat’s eyes
The M62 was plunged into chaos last night following the removal of nearly 500 cat's eyes from the motorway at Junction 20 by the...
Rochdale trolley collector quits job, anaesthetises pigeon and cuts off let to pursue career...
A Rochdale man has today spoken exclusively to the Herald about his short-lived career as a pirate.
Captain Lidl Beard had been working as a...
MP claims he was researching book on whether breasts make noises like clown horns
Leading MP Pete Who speaks out after being named in the Dirty Dossier.
The Member of Parliament for Goveshire West, Pete Who, has given a...
Deranged cycle path murders his spell checker
Rochdale police have announced they have comprehended and changed a man in his fortes for the brittle killing of his spell checker.
In a statesman, a...
Unmasked – The Real Jack the Ripper
The question of the identity of the serial killer known as ‘The Whitechapel Murderer’, ‘Leather Apron’ or, most famously Jack the Ripper has been...
Rochdale man thrown from office window
A Rochdale man is in a critical condition after he was thrown out of the third floor window of his office kitchenette.
Mr Dickinson (39...
Donald Trump signs Executive Order Banning Entry of Toddlers into USA
After being alerted to the shockingly high number of deaths caused by toddlers shooting their parents, President Trump signed the legally binding order yesterday that prevents...
Scatter Cushion Killer walks free
Rochdale Crown Court today saw the conclusion of the now infamous "Scatter Cushion Slaying" case.
The accused, Abraham Smith (54), from the Sink Estate pleaded...
Pooh denies grooming allegations
Aging entertainer Winnie The Pooh is in the headlines again as yet another scandal dogs him.
The bear, who was linked to a series of...
Dyslexic holocaust denier accused of being anti-semantic
"It's them Joos again!" exclaimed Noel Iteracy. "I hate Joos, except Orange Juice, they was a good band, but Big Country was huge twats...
Greater Manchester Police hire youngest ever Special Constable
Greater Manchester Police have hired the youngest ever special Constable this week. James Cannings was sworn in by Chief Constable Rob Potts on Thursday.
James...
Jobs with street value of £25 million found in flat of immigrant scrounger
The recent drought of jobs for British citizens has been an ongoing concern. Tirelessly the DWP and businesses have been desperately trying to scramble...
G4S win contract to run Guantanamo Bay
Top US officials today confirmed that security company G4S have been granted the contract to oversee all operations in the somewhat controversial detention centre...
Rochdale Murderer Caught
There was shock and disbelief amongst Rochdale motorists yesterday as the police went out and caught a murderer, instead of stopping poor innocent speed...
Isis Claims Responsibility for Education Fair Funding Formula Terror
In a shock announcement this morning, that surprised no one, a spokes-stool for Isis (other names are available) claimed credit for the proposed funding...




















































