Obviously McCanns done it, case closed by bloke down the pub
After ten years everybody and their dog is still absolutely convinced that they know exactly what happened in the Maddie McCann tragedy in Portugal.
“It’s...
Jacob Rees-Mogg snapped drinking mead on the night bus
Haunted hatstand Jacob Rees-Mogg has been forced to issue an apology today after he was snapped drinking mead on the night bus on Tuesday.
The...
Expat Moans About EU Citizens in UK
A British expat has hailed Parliament's rejection of EU citizens' right to stay in the UK post Brexit.
Speaking from beside his swimming pool at...
Donald Trump signs Executive Order Banning Entry of Toddlers into USA
After being alerted to the shockingly high number of deaths caused by toddlers shooting their parents, President Trump signed the legally binding order yesterday that prevents...
999 rescue for man who misunderstood the meaning of ‘rape robot’
A dramatic and embarrassing rescue involving two fire engines and four police cars was underway this morning, after one man failed to realise his...
Men warned not to date clever & pretty girls who might get “a bit...
A Judge has warned men that they only have themselves to blame if they date very clever, very pretty girls who are "a bit...
Government takes time off from covering up child abuse to tell people what kind...
The UK Government has taken time off from failing the victims of institutional child abuse and covering the tracks of high profile paedophiles to tell people what kind of pornography they're allowed to watch.
Rochdale man thrown from office window
A Rochdale man is in a critical condition after he was thrown out of the third floor window of his office kitchenette.
Mr Dickinson (39...
US Police Report Record Start to Season After “Glorious Twelfth”
US Police are have reported a record start to the Season after the traditional start to the Civilian Shooting Season with Tulsa leading the...
Julian Assange plans quiet Christmas at home
Julian Assange has confirmed that he will be having a quiet Christmas at home this year.
In a telephone call Mr Assange told us,...
Basil Brush on the defensive as police release CCTV image of ‘Croydon Cat Killer’
Television celebrity Basil Brush has been forced to reject allegations that he is responsible for the gruesome deaths of over 400 cats across London and the...
Women Still Not Going Down Regularly Enough Say Men
The most recent figures for the UK Prison Population gender gap show men getting sent down at record levels with women going down barely...
Outrage as Paddington Bear deported back to Peru
Much loved star of children's literature, TV and films, Paddington Bear, has been arrested and deported to Peru, as part of a round up of...
Tommy Robinson wins coveted softest mouth in Hull prison award
Tommy Robinson has been voted HMP Hull's softest mouth award.
Mr Robinson will be awarded the prize in a ceremony to be held on the...
Daily Mail Editor sectioned after being confused by photograph of white terrorist
The Editor of The Daily Mail was carried out of Northcliffe House in a straitjacket this morning after a photograph of a white man...
H revealed to be H in shocking Line of Duty twist
In a shocking plot twist the mysterious crime boss 'H' has been revealed to be H in the finale of Line of Duty
In a...
