Terroist

British Patriots demand Register of Terrorists

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Paul Golding has picked up the baton from Nick Griffin today in calling for a Register of Potential Terrorists. The call comes in the wake...
British Transport Police

Jury rules justified homicide after man murdered for drinking mug of tea without removing...

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A jury has ruled justifiable homicide in the case of a man who was beaten to death on a train near Rochdale after several...

Man Dressed As Batman Chasing Man Dressed As Clown Captured By Man Dressed As...

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Rochdale Town Centre, and a man dressed as Batman who has been spotted in the locale chasing a man dressed as a Killer Clown...
Police

Expansion of stop and search powers opposed by MPs and other criminals

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Leaked Home Office document shows that the high concentration of police at the entrance to Parliament could lead to unprecedented levels of stop and...

Scatter Cushion Killer walks free

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Rochdale Crown Court today saw the conclusion of the now infamous "Scatter Cushion Slaying" case. The accused, Abraham Smith (54), from the Sink Estate pleaded...
Tommy Robinson

Tommy Robinson wins coveted softest mouth in Hull prison award

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Tommy Robinson has been voted HMP Hull's softest mouth award. Mr Robinson will be awarded the prize in a ceremony to be held on the...

Archbishop Welby kicks shit out of Nigel Farage following Twitter spat

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Archbishop Welby is currently helping police with their enquiries in Westminster after allegedly kerb stomping Nigel Farage.
Ambulance Katie Hopkins

Katie Hopkins hospitalised after choking on apology to Muslim

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Katie Hopkins was driven slowly to hospital yesterday after choking on the word "sorry" while typing a court ordered apology to the Mahmoud family.
Criminal have pixelated faces

Study finds people with pixelated faces 70% more likely to commit crime

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A study carried out by some of the country's top criminologists has highlighted a surprising correlation between people with pixelated faces and a predisposition...
Laptop

Not all men, say men

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Men would like you to know that the thing a man just did, just isn't something they would do Following a recent incident where a...

NYPD Target Leprechaun Community After $1m Bucket of Gold Stolen

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NYPD are looking for a thief who managed to carry an 86lb (36kg) bucket of gold flakes worth $1.6m (£1.2m) off a truck in...
Clown

Police advise public to ‘grow up’ over rise in clown related call outs

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Police call handlers up and down the country have been inundated with calls from concerned citizens in relation to a bizzare new craze in...

Rochdale trolley collector quits job, anaesthetises pigeon and cuts off let to pursue career...

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A Rochdale man has today spoken exclusively to the Herald about his short-lived career as a pirate. Captain Lidl Beard had been working as a...

Party with nothing to hide announce plan to close Serious Fraud Office

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Conservative plans to abolish the Serious Fraud Office has absolutely nothing to do with the investigations into rich Conservative supporters,said a spokesgrunt for the...
Free Tommy Robinson

‘Off to free Tommy Robinson’ replaces ‘dropping kids off at the pool’ as UK’s...

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News is just in that spot poll of everybody in the UK has revealed today that the UK's favourite synonym for taking a dump...
Guantanamo Bay

G4S win contract to run Guantanamo Bay

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Top US officials today confirmed that security company G4S have been granted the contract to oversee all operations in the somewhat controversial detention centre...

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