Survivor

Last PPI claimant found alive and well

2
The last person who is yet to be investigated whether or not they were mis-sold PPI has been found, bewildered, but alive.  After years of...

Apple to move to Battersea iStation

0
Apple have announced this week that they will be basing their future British tax evasion projects at South London's Battersea Power Station. Mayor Sadiq Khan...

ISIS and UN unite to condemn So-Called Yodel Customer Services for crimes against humanity

8
ISIS and all the member states of the United Nations have broadly condemned the British parcel delivery firm and courier service Yodel for crimes against humanity.
Geese

New £50 note to be made of foie gras

0
In a surprise move, it was revealed today that the new £50 note is to be made of foie gras. The announcement comes as...
Lego logo

Lego let go of Trump

5
It has been revealed this week that toy manufacturing giants Lego will not produce a figure of president elect Donald Trump. Many have regarded this...
Smiling Liam Fox

Liam Fox Announces Trade Deal With Iraq

0
Liam Fox, Secretary of State For International Trade, has followed up the success of his charm offensive with Duterte, the leader of the Philippines...

Social Media punishing the pound in Postal workers pockets

0
With the rise and rise of Facebook, E-Cards and Internet banking the way we celebrate important events with family and friends is fast changing.  Nowadays...

Mexico Offers to Purchase Channel Tunnel Following Brexit

0
A Mexican conglomerate has offered to purchase the Channel Tunnel when Britain formally leaves the European Union. Juan Tunnelsunda, CEO of Tunnels 2 US, a...
Power Station

Tories not free market enough for money grabbing Conn man

0
Some people in the Conservative Party don’t have blind and unquestioning faith in dogmatic free market bullshit, a rich bloke who charges people extortionate...
McDonald's

Mcdonalds to stop giving away assault rifles in Happy Meals in some US states

0
Four states in America have stopped giving away free assault rifles with every Happy Meal deal as a direct response to KFC banning knives...

Patriotic billionaire Brexit supporter patriotically moves headquarters to Singapore

0
A Brexit supporting patriotic billionaire is so confident that Brexit is good for business that he's decided to move the headquarters of his business...
Vegan woman

Bank of England to use vegan fat in new £20 notes

0
Last year vegans and social justice warriors, fighting on behalf of un-offended Hindus and Sikhs, absolutely lost their shit because of the Bank of...

Rochdale Banking Firm NM Rothschild and Sons Hail Brexit Vote as a “victory for...

0
Billionaire currency traders were jubilant after night of uncertainty saw the pound tumble to a 31 year low after reaching a five year high...

Burger King announce 126oz Presidential Milkshake for Trump visit

0
Popular scarfing establishment Burger King has announced a new super-sized 126 ounce milkshake, to be released on Jun 2nd in time for the visit...

Mecca Bingo rebrands as Bethlehem Number Snap

4
Britain's biggest bingo operator Mecca Bingo is to be rebranded "Bethlehem Number Snap" following pressure from right wing political groups a spokesman for Mecca's...
Man Shop

Shops Brace Themselves for Annual 24th December Man Shop of Well Packaged Shite

0
Man Shop's Eve - the day men buy all their Christmas presents using no thought or imagination based only upon the quality of packaging...

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