Mexico Offers to Purchase Channel Tunnel Following Brexit
A Mexican conglomerate has offered to purchase the Channel Tunnel when Britain formally leaves the European Union.
Juan Tunnelsunda, CEO of Tunnels 2 US, a...
Phil Spencer really was a Secret Agent
In an ironic illustration of life imitating art it was revealed today that Channel 4 property porn star, Phil Spencer, really did operate as...
Facebook will always be free for students, promises Nick Clegg
Following the news that Nick Clegg has been hired by Facebook it has been announced that the platform will absolutely, definitely, always be free...
IKEA announce new post Brexit home-ware range
Swedish furniture and home-ware giant IKEA have announced that it plans tolaunch a new range of "post Brexit furniture and home-ware" to suit the...
“I Can’t Wipe My Arse With New £Fiver” Say Tory Chair Lord Bastard
New Prime Minister Teresa May has had a sensational bust-up with party Chairman - Lord Bastard of Hubris - over the new £5 note....
Surprise as men who rigged Tesco milk prices also rigged share prices
Three Tesco directors are in court on fraud charges. The food-fancying fanatic (alleged) fraudsters have, it seems, been cooking the books as well as...
Rochdale Set to Become Major Irony Exporter
The irony mining industry in Rochdale, previously in serious decline, received a massive boost yesterday following the result of the US Presidential elections.
Irony is...
Kent Experiencing Building Boom
Leaked document reveals the Government has begun a refit of four derelict seaside hotels in Kent for use as internment camps housing dissenters during...
4,000 job cuts at HSBC after Columbian drug cartels move accounts to Barclays
HSBC has told investors today that around 2% of the company's workforce will be made redundant with the focus on anybody who hasn't got...
We’re not doing anything dodgy with your data, says company renowned for doing dodgy...
A multi-million organisation has insisted that there's nothing suspicious at all about the new data policy updates, despite them being completely and utterly suspicious.
'The...
Cathedral City Cheddar not the best cheddar ‘just fucking unavoidable’ say consumers
According to consumers in Rochdale Cathedral City Cheddar is not the best cheddar, it’s just completely unavoidable.
A survey of all of the fridges in...
Man from Del Monte faces deportation
Amber Rudd has confirmed that the Man from Del Monte is to be deported.
The man who arrived in the UK in the 1980's recently...
Gaucho steak restaurant chain latest to get burnt by borrowing to beef up returns
Restaurant chain Gaucho, and its sister Cau, collapsed into administration this week, after it was steered into a series of financial mis-steaks
Administrators have taken...
Flag Furore as Fans Face Fines
An entire street on Rochdale's Newbold estate was threatened with fines on Monday - if they refuse to remove a multitude of flags from...
Industrial Action Threatened as British Workers Jobs at Threat in Languages Row
Reports that several British workers have had their employment terminated from the world famous British sofa manufacturer Zestra, because they failed to learn Polish...
Online tat markets filling up with utter crap that ‘Would make a great Christmas...
As the nights draw in and the last of the pre-winter rituals of ‘Children Demanding Sweets by Menaces’ night, ‘Throwing Fireworks at Cats’ night...
