In a statement today, popular British high street book retailer Waterstones announced all books with post-apocalyptic themes will be moved to the current affairs section.

CEO James Daunt said “Customers have become increasingly disillusioned by fake news, and are turning to physical books that they can hold in their hand as the only thing they can trust to guide them in these uncertain times. But lack of familiarity with the layout of an actual physical shop has been causing them difficulty.”

“This move should help our customers find the guidance on world events they seek, improving staff efficiency. For example, for those interested in current US politics, in The Stand, Stephen King articulates a clear vision of Trashcan Man, radiation-poisoned, dragging a nuclear warhead through the desert. Or as President Trump calls it, September 2017.”

“Similarly, The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood, is helpful guidance for those wondering why Homeland Security have suspended ATM use by females.”

The British retailer has much to offer for those interested in home affairs of course. Daunt recommends the second edition of Children of Men, by PD James as a guide.

“The recently published edition updates Year Omega from 1995, to the more accurate 2016, and readers will appreciate the way in which James anticipates how the UK will embrace the many opportunities for change afforded by the Brexit referendum.”

Finally, Daunt recommends “RoboRipper” by Pulitzer Prize winning journalist turned author Johnny Wapping. This explains how the private contractors running British prisons worked with a leading search engine provider to upload or “rip” the mind of former HGV driver Peter Sutcliffe to Skynet.

Sutcliffe will control a fleet of driverless lorries, with testing expected to take place in Yorkshire later this year.

Like many satirists, Johnny Wapping accepts he is an arsehole, and thinks society could be better if we were all willing to accept what arseholes we are. If you see him on Facebook, why not ask if he's read the article?