Festive upper middle class shoppers in Waitrose were astonished and horrified to learn that the store is run as a workers’ collective.
Eric Pode (40), a shopper in the Croydon branch and a keen amateur racist said “It’s a disgrace. I thought I was supporting the monied elite by shopping here, but the snob value of my custom has been destroyed by this information. A worker’s collective? It sounds like something out of Karl Marx, or one of his brothers.”
His comments were echoed by Daphne Psuede, a 29 year old senior graphic designer, as she got out of her wholly unnecessary Range Rover at the Rochdale branch “I cannot believe my beetroot gravadlax and quails eggs have been touched by …. like…. OMG…. actual socialists!!”
Waitrose is part of the John Lewis Partnership which has been run along such worker-oriented lines since 1929. However, over the last year, as a result of an increasingly militant left-wing tendency among workers, and as a reaction to the lurch to the right in British politics, Waitrose has adopted a series of radical new names for their own brand products.
These include the Engels range of dairy products, the Ulyanov vodka brand, the Anarcho-Syndicalist cooked meat label, and the Guevara tapas range.
