Bank of England to use vegan fat in new £20 notes
Last year vegans and social justice warriors, fighting on behalf of un-offended Hindus and Sikhs, absolutely lost their shit because of the Bank of...
Rochdale letting agency wins top award.
A prestigious national industry award has been won by local letting agents Fyre, Trappe and Hassel.
The British Association of Letting Agencies awarded the...
Global economy near collapse after George Osborne pulls sickie
It has been revealed that once George Osborne takes up his post as Editor of the London Evening Standard, his importance to the global...
Banks Punish Entrepreneurs For Brexit
Our Finance and Business correspondent, Scott Zsalt, was livid today after failing to get support from a major bank due to the fallout from...
Lost Amazon Tribe found really fit and well
Startling news reached us today that a lost tribe of warehouse workers has been found "really fit" and well in an Amazon 'fulfilment centre'...
University of Burnley to offer a degree course in Fruit Picking.
As part of the government's recently launched Fu*k Business initiative, the University of Burnley is offering a 5 Year degree course in fruit picking,...
Pret A Manger have successfully poisoned more people this year than Vladimir Putin
Pret a Manger have successfully poisoned more people in Britain in 2017-2018 than Vladimir Putin according to sources within the GRU.
The news comes after...
Southern Rail hire United Airlines CEO to improve customer service
Sir Horton Brown, head of Southern Rail’s parent Go Ahead and Govia companies is to be replaced this week by the CEO of United...
Rochdale DFS Sale has finally ended
Rochdale DFS announced the first end of a sale for a decade after running out of sofas yesterday.
DFS customers in Rochdale are expected to...
Supermarkets Brexit crisis as panic buyers hoard essentials
?Staff arriving for work at the new Rochdale Waitrose were surprised to find a car park full of Range Rovers and a queue of concerned...
Premier Inn to change all the locks tonight
Every Premier Inn in the country is changing their locks tonight, whilst Lenny Henry hosts Red Nose Day on the BBC.
Mr. Henry was the...
You’re more likely to find nice top at car boot sale wearing blindfold than...
It turns out that you’re more likely to find something that fits if you close your eyes and dig around in a skip or the boot of a stranger’s car than at TK Maxx.
Austerity horror as Samantha Cameron admits to sending her cook to Aldi
Samantha Cameron has triggered an outpouring of concern this morning with the revelation that she has had to send cook to Aldi.
And it gets...
New £50 note to be made of foie gras
In a surprise move, it was revealed today that the new £50 note is to be made of foie gras. The announcement comes as...
Ryanair fires first salvo in airline price war by introducing “shrinkflation” routes
Budget Irish airline Ryanair has fired the first salvo in it's threatened "summer fares war", but instead of cutting fares as everyone expected, CEO...
Kent Experiencing Building Boom
Leaked document reveals the Government has begun a refit of four derelict seaside hotels in Kent for use as internment camps housing dissenters during...
