Royals

Prince Andrew has announced plans to spend 6 months of the year living in Thailand. The Prince will then spend the other 6 months living in London. In a statement a spokesman for the Prince...

Prince Andrew has denied allegations that he met Emily Maitlis or even appeared on the TV show, Newsnight. Despite over 1 million people having seen him do so. Recently appointed PR spokesman for the Prince,...

Councillors in Windsor have been seen sledging using the frozen bodies of homeless people. One told us, "The council wanted them all removed for the royal wedding. This weather has come as a bit of...

Buckingham Palace sources have told The Rochdale Herald that it is "pretty bloody unlikely" that the next Royal baby will be a ginger. They declined to go into any further detail other than to...

Buckingham Palace has refused to confirm rumors that the Queen will greet Donald Trump with a narwhal tusk during his visit to the UK this week. A Palace insider told us, "You'd think there wouldn't...

Young girls were released into the Sandringham Estate and shot at as part of Ghislaine Maxwell's birthday celebrations, Prince Andrew has revealed. The Duke of Pork has denied having sex with the underage girls, however,...

The Queen has bought Prince Andrew a Whirlpool washing machine for Christmas.  A Palace source told us, "It was going cheap because of some recall or something. The Queen loves a bargain so seized her...

Prince Harry has a new job as a Prince Harry look-alike in Canada. His new boss told us, "There's a lot of attention on Prince Harry at the moment. With that attention then demand for...

Prince Harry has been ruled unfit for work by ATOS after attending a work capability assessment. "The Prince was sanctioned last month after he missed his first appointment; the excuse given was that he was...

The people of the United Kingdom were reassured this morning by Prince Harry's statement that he does not want to be king and will only do it if we force him to. Harry, surprisingly red...

A Balmoral based deer has spoken out after being run down by the heir to the British throne. Dougal Hornhead spoke to the Herald after seeking veterinary care. "Aye, I wiz jist out for a run...

Royal offspring are like the grown up children who return to the nest once they have completed their time in higher education. You think it's finally over but unlike the Geoff Hurst 1966 fourth...

In an unprecedented move Theresa May is to inform Queen Elizabeth that she will need to redo today's Queen's Speech in Parliament because she forgot to say 'strong and stable'. The shock announcement from Downing...

A bloke in a pub has claimed that the Duchess of Cambridge’s unborn child is his, reports have confirmed. Unemployed Willie Eckerslike, 42, from Rochdale, was overheard telling a crowd of people in the pub...

Hate preacher Abu Hamza has been invited to a State Visit after Number 10 revealed that they are widening the scope of the unsavoury extremists that can benefit from such an honour. Downing Street...

Windsor-- Following complaints of aggressive begging on the streets of Windsor today Prince Harry was among the vagrants swept up in a Thames Police sting operation. The Prince was amongst dozens of beggars on the...