Director of CIA asks Jason Bourne to drop in on Trump for a ‘quiet...

11
The Director of The CIA, John O'Brennan, asked Jason Bourne to pop over to Trump Tower. Following allegations Donald Trump made about the US intelligence...

Trump to brave Muslim controlled no go area during UK Visit

0
Despite the advice of Fox News commentator, Steven Emerson, advisors to Donald Trump have said that there is a strong possibility that the so-called...

US Military confirm nuclear weapons controlled by simple massive orange knob

0
Washington - The American military revealed one of its most closely guarded secrets this week.
Kim Jong Un Submarine

North Korea won’t be happy until someone else tests a nuclear warhead on their...

0
North Korea state media shouted the revelation this morning that Kim Jong-un won’t be happy until someone else tests a nuclear warhead on North...

Border Control detain drug using hate preacher

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Praise for Security Services for successful policing of border A known hate preacher, in South Africa to sow racial tension, has been successfully detained by...

Wright brothers blamed for rise in immigration

6
Criticism has been placed upon two American inventors for the dramatic rise in immigration, it has been confirmed. Brothers Orville and Wilbur Wright, who are...

Police fear French blogger killed in whipped cream accident may have topped herself

39
The international irony reservoir was overflowing this week as news came through that French lifestyle and fitness blogger, Becky Fromage-Burger, was slain in her...
Trump Baby

Trump eats baby in front of mother during rally

2
Donald Trump hit a new low today by disembowelling a newborn baby and eating her still beating heart like an apple after she interrupted...

Boris meant Saudis are awesome says Defence Secretary Michael Fallon

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Boris Johnson’s words on Saudi Arabia and other Middle East powers were misreported, according to a clearly desperate Defence Secretary Sir Mr Michael of Fallon.
Michael Flatley

Michael Flatley confirmed as world’s second biggest wanker

5
Rhino horn collector and jig enthusiast Michael Flatley confirmed today that he is the World's second biggest wanker after announcing he will perform a jig at Trump's Inauguration Ball.

Robert E Lee statue replaced by bronze of obese man in pickup truck holding...

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The move comes in order to calm social tensions enraged over the weekend when the savage alt-left attacked a group of peaceful demonstrators merely having a walk with some torches and flags to highlight the importance of freedom of speech.
ISIS

Isis Claims Responsibility for Education Fair Funding Formula Terror

In a shock announcement this morning, that surprised no one, a spokes-stool for Isis (other names are available) claimed credit for the proposed funding...

Donald Trump tests positive for IQ-19

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Despite being the healthiest individual ever elected to the Presidency, reports are emerging that Donald Trump has tested positive for IQ-19. Harold Bornstein, Trump's former...

It’s not nepotism it’s just a coincidence he’s my son-in-law says Trump

9
World breathes a collective sigh of relief as journalist who met Jared Kuschner claims “he should make you feel more comfortable”.

Anonymous declare war on ISIS for 4657th time.

The group Anonymous have today declared war on ISIS for the 4657th time. A spokesman for the group said, "ISIS should prepare for a fate...

Netanyahu Furious After Trump Scores Israel Lower Than Saudi Arabia In TripAdvisor Review

Prime Minister Netanyahu demanded an apology from the White House today. The move came after Donald Trump scored his Israeli short stay lower than Saudi Arabia...

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