?Kim Jong Un invents universal cure
The secretive state of North Korea has managed to cure most illnesses from the common cold to cancer, it has been revealed.
Ishit Yu Not,...
US Professor Seeks European Expertise to Erase 5 Years History from Text Books
The Head of History Faculty at Harvard University is to tour European institutions to discover the best ways to whitewash 5 years of history...
Americans forced to drink milkshakes through AR-15 assault rifles after plastic straw ban hits...
The unjust plastic straw ban threatens the American way of life, but citizens are finding an innovative way to beat the ban.
Consuming tens of...
Kremlins useful idiots deny that they’re Kremlins useful idiots
A bunch of useful idiots have denied that they are useful idiots today after a series of e-mails seemed to prove that they were...
National Association of C#nts sue Florida for asking murderers to wait a bit to...
The National Association of Massive Cunts filed a lawsuit in federal court Friday in an attempt to block a Florida law to make murderous...
Prize boffin apparently unaware of weather
The winner of this year's Dyson James Dyson Boffin Admired By Dyson's James Dyson Award, is Isis.
No, not the naughty middle eastern twerps, a...
Trump’s cognitive ability is normal, says White House vet
WASHINGTON: The actual real-life US President Donald Trump has achieved a normal score on a cognitive exam and is in excellent fettle, although he...
Katie Hopkins killed and eaten by starving migrants
Mail Online columnist Katie Hopkins' plan to drown migrants attempting to cross the Mediterranean to prevent them coming to the UK has been put...
Plucky underdog wins Russian Presidential election against all odds
Vladimir 'Don't call this a comeback, I've been here before' Putin has surprised not only the people but himself by winning the race to...
Worst thing to happen in America today was my hair got wet, Trump tells...
The actual real life president of the United States of America told the Future Farmers of America Convention that the worst thing to happen...
Harvey Weinstein secures Republican 2020 Presidential Nomination
Harvey Weinstein has officially been nominated by the Republican Party as their candidate to contest the 2020 Presidential Election.
Mr Weinstein gained support from a...
Melania did not have sex with horrible old men for money admits Daily Mail
The Daily Mail have gone on the record today to say that Melania Trump did not and never has had sex with any horrible...
CIA to dumb down intelligence briefings
The U.S. Director of National Intelligence (DNI) Dan Coats, announced on Sunday that they will be cutting down the president’s daily intelligence briefings to a maximum...
Why does this keep happening, ask imbeciles who keep selling guns to people who...
Fuckwits in America who keep blocking gun control reform have been forced to once again ask the question "why do mass shootings happen over...
Yemenis Grateful That Britain Tidying Up Arms Deals
Ordinary Yemenis have taken a break from being killed by British and American bombs and weapons to thank the British Government for tightening up...
Absolute arsehole Winnie Mandela dies aged 81
An absolute arsehole has died in South Africa aged 81.
