He knew what he signed up for, says dickhead who doesn’t know what he...
Proving once and for all that sometimes the best thing to say is nothing, Donald Trump told the widow of a grieving soldier that...
James Bond producers buzzing about Putin’s Cold War reboot
The producers of the James Bond movie franchise are said to be absolutely over the moon about Vladimir Putin's recent decision to reboot the Cold War.
Fatal logic feedback loop kills five more Americans
America has once again been proved right as yet another mass shooting takes place in shopping mall and nobody armed inside could shoot the...
Rank outsider sweeps to completely surprising victory in Turkish Presidential election
A rank-outsider has swept to victory in Turkey's presidential election defying the odds to secure a third five year term.
Election authority chief said "imagine...
OJ Simpson appointed White House press secretary
Tongues are wagging in Washington today over what seems too convenient for coincidence as OJ Simpson is rumoured about to be appointed as Sean...
Good Friday Agreement to be replaced by Stupid Friday Agreement
The Good Friday agreement of 1998 has been replaced by the Stupid Friday Agreement of 2017.
Prime Minister Theresa Mayhem has asked Northern Irish Democratic...
Biff Tannen secures Republican Party presidential nomination
The world was horrified but not terribly surprised to discover this morning that professional gambler and self-styled American oligarch Biff Tannen secured the US...
Meme Jihadis Trump Clinton
Pepe the frog has admitted today that he was behind the success of Donald Trump in the recent US presidential elections.
"Presidential? Fix-a-dential more like!...
Trump says he didn’t sexually assault 3.52 billion other women
Bewigged bouffant buffoon, Donald J. Trump, an actual potential president, made the claim at his latest rally.
The tiny handed eater of souls came under...
Germany devoid of German Christmas markets
German shoppers are disappointed that they have nowhere to buy lots of pointless tat in the run up to Christmas.
With every British town apparently...
Britain to join new ‘European Federation’ after Brexit
EXCLUSIVE: With Britain poised to trigger Article 50 and put the wheels irreversibly in motion to finally leave the European Union, a leaked home office...
Theresa May offers Germany Sunderland
Theresa May was left visibly irritated this morning when a generous offer to Germany was rejected out of hand.
May’s sincere offer, to hand Sunderland over...
President Trump outlaws Donald Trump in white supremacists condemnation order
American race relations looked to be on the upturn today after President Donald Trump responded to the calls from Congress to condemn white supremacists...
Donald Trump Is Disappearing Up His Own Arse
American scientists confirmed last night that US President, Donald Trump, is close to completely disappearing up his own arse.
Professor Steven Sigmoid...
Trump nominates Bill Cosby for US Supreme Court
Bill Cosby has been elected to the US Supreme Court after being sentenced for sex assault.
Cosby, who today received a 10 year sentence for...
Trump’s American Dream – 25 Million to Leave the Country
Donald J. Trump unveiled a pledge on Thursday to create 25 million jobs over the next decade, but experts are arguing whether they strictly...
