Trump: tinfoil a good defence against mind control rays
President-elect Donald J Trump has announced a groundbreaking and cutting edge technology to combat the growing menace of conspiracies facing the US.
He is well...
Home Office to open Job Centre and Benefits Office in Migrant Calais Jungle
There was outrage in the editorial bunker at The Rochdale Herald after one of the editorial team accidentally read an article in the Telegraph.
"It...
Hard Core Fans Dismayed as PJ Harvey Admires Theresa May’s Shoes
Hardcore fans of uncompromising musician Polly Jean (PJ) Harvey have reacted angrily to their musical idol expressing admiration for Prime Minister Theresa Mary May's...
Incest enthusiast congratulates infidelity enthusiast
Amateur golfer and incest enthusiast Donald Trump has congratulated the UK's infidelity champion Boris Johnson on becoming the latest worst Prime Minister in living...
Sir Richard Branson arrested for looting in British Virgin Islands
Billionaire adventurer and entrepreneur Sir Richard Branson is currently in custody in the British Virgin Islands after being arrested for looting, according to reports....
IRS look forward to “getting to the bottom” of Trump’s Federal Income Tax “I’m...
Surgical glove manufacturer Sphinctoraw Inc got a surprise order for 110,000 pairs of elbow length surgical gloves from the IRS.
The order was placed...
Spain Says ‘Direct Rule Impossible’ after Entire Catalan Population Hides
Spanish Prime-Minister Marion Rajoy has tonight been unable to suspend the Catalonian Parliament after their leader along with the rest of the population went...
Trump launches intercontinental Tweet at North Korea
POTUS and orange spacehopper Donald Trump has reacted angrily to the first North Korean missile test since he took office.
The massive and overwhelming response...
Donald Trump is a hoax, says Global Warming
Global Warming, the phenomenon by which mankind is fucking up the environment, has confirmed on Twitter today that Donald Trump is in fact a...
Boris Johnson launches ‘Free Robert Mugabe’ campaign
The campaign is headed up by Boris Johnson who is thought to believe that if it's successful he could be the leader of Zanu...
Denmark offers to buy America from Russia
Mette Frederiksen, the Prime Minister of Denmark has reportedly expressed an interest in buying the Russian controlled territory of the United States of America.
Rich...
Producers of Rambo 3 sue Donald Trump for plagiarising film plot for Afghanistan strategy
The producers of Rambo 3 are allegedly suing Donald Trump for copyright infringements based on his Afghanistan strategy.
Mr Trump was initially very cold on...
When the world Trumps, you better dodge that draft
Look at him. He’s the lad you thought was a prick at school but you still went round his house because he had a decent back garden for you to leck footy in. Except he was shit at it, and had right bad hayfever.
Pope meets Bono to demand he removes U2’s albums from his iTunes account
Pope Francis is to have a private audience with Bono to demand to know how to delete U2's latest album from his iTunes library.
According...
Actor playing Donald Trump forgets stage directions
Due to White House budget cuts, an experienced but cheap actor was selected for the part. Bit part "character actor" Rowle Player is best...
Donald Trump calls for a ban on schools after latest US school shooting
So-called 'President' and full-time Twitter troll Donald Trump wants a 'total and complete shutdown' of schools in the US after the Florida School shooting earlier...



















































