White House confirms all its press staff do coke

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The White House has admitted today that all its press staff do coke. The admission comes after the latest mouthpiece for President Trump, Mr Scaramucci,...

Trump supporter accidentally extinguishes trainers with own tears

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"Wild" Bill Board, an American protesting at an advert for trainers was unable to get his shoes to burn today because the tears he...

I don’t care what UK Ambassador thinks of me, says dickhead who won’t shut...

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A giant man dayglo baby who won't stop whining about somebody who said some mean things about him has declared on Twitter that he...

Americans horrified to learn what the word ‘amendment’ means

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As hillbillies, rednecks and evangelical Christian right wing crackpots continue to celebrate the last thrashings of America's hold on reality with their ongoing support...

Rothschilds ‘surprised’ at Trump victory but pleased in investment in US wall building company

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The Rothschild family are set for a huge windfall following Donald Trump's 'surprise' success in the US election.
White House

White House denies that men in white coats are coming to take Trump away

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Electing Donald 'The Donald' Trump as their president was undoubtedly one of the most mystifying decisions made by the American people since changing the...

Trump says he didn’t sexually assault 3.52 billion other women

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Bewigged bouffant buffoon, Donald J. Trump, an actual potential president, made the claim at his latest rally. The tiny handed eater of souls came under...
Doctors

Donald Trump Is Disappearing Up His Own Arse

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American scientists confirmed last night that US President, Donald Trump, is close to completely disappearing up his own arse. Professor Steven Sigmoid...
Donald Trump

New tariffs ensure American guns used to shoot American children made from American metal

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Donald Trump has just revealed that the reason behind the new Steel Import Tariffs is to mitigate concerns that the deadly and easily purchased...

‘One is married to Philip’ Queen reminds Public who think Trump too racist for...

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Over 1.8 million Britons have signed a petition to deny a State Visit to nylon-haired snake-oil salesman and part-time President, Donald Trump.  The petition insists...

Donald Trump’s penis is largest the world has ever seen says Donald Trump

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Donald Trump has asked his propaganda secretary, Sean Spicer, to assure The White House press corps that President Trump's penis is "the largest penis in the history of penises. Period!"

Election Was Rigged Claims Trump – Recount Demanded

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Donald Trump has sensationally claimed that the 2016 US Presidential Election was rigged and he is demanding a recount.

Trump tells California, Cut down all the trees to prevent future forest fires

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POTATUS has announced that if all the trees in California were cut down then there would be no forest fires. POTATUS got the idea after...

Trump to brave Muslim controlled no go area during UK Visit

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Despite the advice of Fox News commentator, Steven Emerson, advisors to Donald Trump have said that there is a strong possibility that the so-called...

I don’t need no intelligence, I got this far without none says Trump

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Donald Trump confounded satirists again this week after sensationally declaring that he doesn't need intelligence as he has managed to get this far without it.
Donald Trump Wig

‘News media so fake’ says perma-tanned, toupee-wearing septuagenarian

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The world's favourite orange leader has been ranting about his pet hate once again. The issue of so-called “Fake news” is now well within...

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