First shipment of thoughts and prayers for mass shooting victims arrive in California

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It's all better in California now after a much needed vital shipment of thoughts and prayers arrived in Gilroy following today's mass shooting. "Yeah, we're...
Ferrero Roche

Nigel Farage spends £1,000 on Ferrero Rocher ‘just in case’

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Far right stringless Thunderbird puppet and multi-millionaire Dulwich educated ex-banker and man of the people Nigel Farage reportedly bought the middle class toffees straight...
Quantum Leap

Dr Samuel Beckett stuck in 2016 after failing to ‘put right what once went...

15
In the mid 1990's Physicist Dr Samuel Beckett blazed a trail by stepping into his Quantum Leap accelerator and vanishing. In actual fact he woke to...

All guns to be armed with guns

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In the wake of the latest mass shooting of innocent people to take place on U.S. soil, the National Rifle Association has issued a...

J K Rowling denies seven figure sum to write ‘President Trump and the White...

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Other proposed titles in the series are, ‘Vladimir Putting and the Half Brained President’, ‘Donnie Trump and the Gob of Fire and Fury’, ‘President Trump and the Prisoner of Asshat’, ‘Donald Trump and the Magic Revolving Door of Power’ and ‘Donald in the Competition to be Crazier than North Korea’.

Trump Perfected Curtsy For Saudi King Salman

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Donald Trump's impeachment looked ever more certain in the last few days after images were released of him curtsying before King Salman of Saudi...

Gun sales rise 300% ahead of Trump Inauguration

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American gun sales have enjoyed a steep rise in the days leading up to the President elect's inauguration. "It's almost 200% more than when Bush...

God outs Gay Gay-Hate preacher with biblical punitive flood

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Pastor Tony Perkins, President of the Family Research Council and a particularly lamentable human being, has been hoist by his own petard and "outed"...

Canada recognises the Alamo as capital of Mexico

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Donald Trump has given a calm and measured response to news that Canada intends to move it's Mexican embassy to the Alamo. Just kidding. Trump...

When the world Trumps, you better dodge that draft

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Look at him. He’s the lad you thought was a prick at school but you still went round his house because he had a decent back garden for you to leck footy in. Except he was shit at it, and had right bad hayfever.
hand written notes

Trump apologises for misreading email.

1
President Donald J. Trump has apologised for misreading an email which has led to some bizarre policy announcements in the last few days. The President was...

U.S transgender community ‘relieved’ they will not die fighting for Trump

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As President Trump, leader of the free world, announced that transgender citizens would no longer be allowed to serve the U.S. Armed forces in...
Westboro Baptist Church

Westboro Baptist Churchgoers saddened by news that God actually hates FAQ’s

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Congregation of famously homophobic church disheartened to learn that The Almighty is 'proper hacked off with being asked the same dumb shit over and...

Trump nothing like Hitler. Hitler wasn’t fat and bald say experts

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Historian's have said that Donald Trump is nothing like Hitler as Hitler wasn't fat and bald. Stan Still said, "A lot of people have been...

Trump thrilled crowds at his German rallies bigger than Obama’s

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President Donald Trump has spoken of his delight at how many people have come onto the streets of Hamburg to welcome him to Germany. The...
Donald Trump

Bloke who fancies his daughter lies about woman marrying her brother

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A bloke who wants to shag his daughter has suggested that a top US politician should be investigated for marrying her brother. Incest enthusiast and...

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