Trump appoints David Duke to head Black Lives Don’t Matter initiative
Dr David Duke, former Grand Dragon of the Ku Klux Klan, Senate hopeful and all American Nazi Screwball, has accepted President Elect Donald Trump’s offer of a key advisory role in his new government.
Trump gives world a ‘pearl necklace’ as withdrawal does not stop emissions
President Donald J. Trump will keep his promise not to come in the world’s mouth and insisted he would squirt his emissions onto the...
Trump tells California, Cut down all the trees to prevent future forest fires
POTATUS has announced that if all the trees in California were cut down then there would be no forest fires.
POTATUS got the idea after...
Trump vows to chisel four ‘losers’ off Mount Rushmore
President Trump has vowed to have the images of four of his predecessors chiselled off Mount Rushmore, describing them as ‘total losers’.
In a...
Modern Day Presidential latest euphemism for complete and utter numpty, say linguists
As Humpty Dumpty said, "When I use a word, it means whatever I want it to mean." Clearly in a world of self-reductible horseshit,...
Putin’s money was just resting in my account Trump tells James Comey
Donald Trump has dismissed as fake news any suggestion that money that has appeared in his account is anything to do with collusion with...
White House CCTV confirms Obama listening to Trump in Oval Office
Secret Service agents are reviewing White House CCTV footage this morning which Donald Trump believes show Obama inside the White House.
The footage, captured in...
If All the Jews had died in the Holocaust then Saturday’s massacre wouldn’t have...
POTATUS, Donald Trump attended a memorial for the victims of the Tree of Life Synagogue shooting yesterday.
After publicly stating that people should come together...
I don’t make mistakes says man who accidentally got himself elected President
A giant orange man child who accidentally got himself elected President of the United States during a publicity stunt for his gaudy golf course business announced live on television that he doesn't make mistakes, immediately before making a mistake.
Trump joins Time Magazine “Person of the Year” club
In a move in keeping with the utter shit show that has been 2016, Time Magazine has named the orange baboon Donald Trump "Person...
Condoms are a commie liberal plot to give everybody AIDS according to Trump VP
Revelations of comments made by Donald Trump's running mate, the 'Caucasian Executioner of Indiana', Mike Pence show that Governor Pence might not know how...
President Trump has hopes dashed each time he hears ‘oui oui’ during French visit
Donald Trump is experiencing an emotional rollercoaster during his ongoing French visit because each time he hears a French woman say ‘oui oui’ he...
Fictional President held to higher standard than actual President
Fictional President of the United States Francis Underwood has been obliged to step down this week following allegations of historical sexual harassment.
Whilst his Presidency...
Trump’s Wall to be Made Out of Thoughts and Prayers
The latest twist in the ongoing farcical shitshow that is the US President's attempt to build an completely pointless wall simply because he said...
Thoughts and prayers shortages in US reaching crisis point
Shortages of thoughts and prayers for the victims of gun violence is said to be reaching crisis point this morning with many dead people...
Twitter activists shocked that hashtags haven’t eliminated police violence
More than two years after the fatal shooting of teenager Michael Brown, which led to widespread protests against police brutality across the U.S., many...
