J K Rowling denies seven figure sum to write ‘President Trump and the White...

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Other proposed titles in the series are, ‘Vladimir Putting and the Half Brained President’, ‘Donnie Trump and the Gob of Fire and Fury’, ‘President Trump and the Prisoner of Asshat’, ‘Donald Trump and the Magic Revolving Door of Power’ and ‘Donald in the Competition to be Crazier than North Korea’.

Donald Trump to join list of ‘self-aware’ animals after recognising himself in a mirror

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US President Donald Trump joined the list of animals capable of self-awareness yesterday, following reports that he may have finally recognised himself in a...
A delighted Sun Reader

Sun says Trump not nonce as he checks girls teeth before ‘dating’ 

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Sun Readers thrilled Donald Trump acquitted of raping 13 year old after convincing judge she "had teeth of 21 year old."

Trump nominates Bill Cosby for US Supreme Court

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Bill Cosby has been elected to the US Supreme Court after being sentenced for sex assault. Cosby, who today received a 10 year sentence for...

Unite against hate, racism, bigotry and white supremacy, says hateful, racist, bigoted, white supremacist

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Hateful, racist, bigoted white supremacist Donald Trump has called on the people of the United States to unite against hate, racism, bigotry and white...
Man in tinfoil hat

Trump: tinfoil a good defence against mind control rays

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President-elect Donald J Trump has announced a groundbreaking and cutting edge technology to combat the growing menace of conspiracies facing the US. He is well...
Donald Trump

Donald Trump denies allegations he has rigged erections

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The allegation was made by Anthony "Fandango" Scaramucci following his removal from post. The President's former tiny-right-hand man lashed out indiscriminately at his former...
Trump

Trump To Build Ladder To The Moon

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President Donald Trump has confirmed that America is to build the world’s first ladder to the Moon. At a White House press conference Trump stated...

National holiday declared as USA goes 6 days without mass shooting

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This is the closest to a full week that the US has gone without a mass shooting since 'The Great Week of Peace' in...

Giuliani wins Black Man of the Year

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Raving Republican Trump-nugget and ex New York mayor, Rudy Giuliani, was voted Black Man of the Year today after it turned...

Trump Invades Iraq

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President Trump has declared war on Iraq after a five minute conversation with Tony Blair. The former British PM, referred to by White House officials...
Doctors

Donald Trump Is Disappearing Up His Own Arse

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American scientists confirmed last night that US President, Donald Trump, is close to completely disappearing up his own arse. Professor Steven Sigmoid...
Sarah Huckabee

Trump to sue publisher of Fire and Fury when Sarah Huckabee finishes reading it...

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Washington DC - Donald Trump has angrily announced that he intends to sue the publisher of The White House tell all book, Fire and...

US celebrates Independence Day by ceding from Trump

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Secret delegations from the 50 states of the United States of America have agreed a plan to avoid the impeachment of Donald Trump as...

Trump’s presidency is ‘metaphorical, not literal’, says Spicer

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Following unsubstantiated wiretapping allegations, president Trump’s press secretary, Sean Spicer, has argued that Trump is the metaphorical president and leader of the free world,...

Kavanaugh to celebrate Supreme Court confirmation with White House keg party

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Newly-appointed Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh will celebrate his confirmation later today by throwing a massive kegger at the White House, sources have confirmed.   Kavanaugh, whose nomination...

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