Trump says crying widow knew what she was getting into when she answered phone

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President Donald Trump has responded to criticism that he mishandled a phone call with the grieving widow of an American serviceman killed in an...

Obama quietly pleased his G20 riots were bigger than Trump’s

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President Barack Obama, who was born in America, is said to be privately pleased the riots at G20 summits he attended were bigger than...

Nuclear Football replaced with state of the art 1979 Speak and Spell

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The Secret Service and senior members of the National Security Council have taken drastic steps to toughen US Nuclear launch protocols during Donald Trump's presidency by replacing the Nuclear Football with 1979 Speak and Spell.

Terrifying clown in next Stephen King film to be perma-tanned and have a combover

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Stephen King took to twitter today to reveal a juicy nugget regarding his next movie project, ’Idiot’, a sequel to ‘It’, will feature a...

White House CCTV confirms Obama listening to Trump in Oval Office

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Secret Service agents are reviewing White House CCTV footage this morning which Donald Trump believes show Obama inside the White House. The footage, captured in...

Twitter activists shocked that hashtags haven’t eliminated police violence

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More than two years after the fatal shooting of teenager Michael Brown, which led to widespread protests against police brutality across the U.S., many...
Golden sceptre

Trump orders Fabergé selfie-stick for inauguration

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In preparation for his inauguration ceremony, President elect Trump has commissioned Fabergé, the esteemed and historic jewellery makers to the Russian emperors, to craft...

Trump Press Secretary buys fireproof underpants

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The secret of Press Secretary Sean Spicer's propensity for hyperbolic bullshitacity has been revealed.  He has reportedly been wearing a revolutionary new type of asbestos...
Donald Genius Trump

The ‘J’ is for Genius, confirms Donald J Trump

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Washington - The actual real life President of the United States of America Donald J Trump has cleared up speculation over the weekend about...
Baby

Adolf tops list of most popular baby names for boys in USA in 2017

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For the first time in almost fifty years the name Adolf is topping the lists for most popular baby names in the United States...

Hilary Clinton’s emails confirm she would have already nuked North Korea

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Further extracts reveal she had plans to construct “Wall Street on the Korean Peninsula” once the “dust and stuff has settled.”

The NRA are a bunch of arseholes and each and every one of them...

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But ma guns. A survey in 2013 found that the United States had 88.9 firearms for every 100 people. More than Yemen, Mexico, Pakistan and...

Conspiracy theorists concerned nobody might be in charge after all

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American conspiracy theorists heads are exploding at an alarming rate as the two main presidential candidates get more and more terrible. "Up until yesterday I was...

Trump’s presidency is ‘metaphorical, not literal’, says Spicer

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Following unsubstantiated wiretapping allegations, president Trump’s press secretary, Sean Spicer, has argued that Trump is the metaphorical president and leader of the free world,...
Trump furious to learn Farage isn't 'King of England'

Trump furious to learn Farage isn’t ‘King of England’

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President-elect, Donald Trump, learned that Nigel Farage is not the King of England and that the monarch is in fact a female, on an...
Trump Family KKK Photograph

Donald Trump tells world press there were good people at White Supremacist Rally

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Donald Trump told a press conference that there were good people amongst the white supremacists and Neo-Nazis at the Charlottesville Unite the Right protest...

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