IOC Vote Against New American Sport in 2020 Olympics
The USA's hopes to add another pointlessly American sport to the 2020 Olympic have been dashed by the IOC due to concerns over the...
British Fascists upset that UK Government won’t appease Foreign Fascist Dictator
A wealthy British Fascist today took to criticising the British Government for refusing to appease the United States' first elected authoritarian fascist dictator by appointing renowned fascist Nigel Farage as British Ambassador to the US.
Gays seen boarding ark two by two in Texas saying ‘our work here is...
An ark has been spotted in Texas picking up a group of homosexuals who caused all the flooding there.
The findings have come as a...
Bill Clinton Gives Trump His “Little Black Book”
Bill Clinton, who famously began his Presidency by drawing up a list of every woman in America between the ages of 18 and 35, has formally handed over his Little Black Book to President Trump.
Whitehouse denies denying things that were denied last week
The Whitehouse press corps was today left totally baffled by the latest denial issued by a Whitehouse press spokesperson.
The denial was in response to...
Father Ted to use toy cow to explain perspective to Donald Trump
It’s hoped that repeatedly asking Donald Trump to examine both the toy cow and the cows visible at varying distances outside of the caravan will cause a lightbulb moment in the dark and empty space that serves as a brain for Donald, but no one is getting their hopes up.
Virginia to ban books instead of burning them
Parents from the Virginia School District have called for an immediate ban on all novels that contain the n-word.
To Kill a Mockingbird, Of Mice...
Americans horrified to learn what the word ‘amendment’ means
As hillbillies, rednecks and evangelical Christian right wing crackpots continue to celebrate the last thrashings of America's hold on reality with their ongoing support...
Donald Trump Jr upset by chants of ‘lock him up’ from Donald Trump Snr
Donald Trump Jr has allegedly complained that President Trump keeps chanting 'lock him up' at him.
Trump Junior made a complaint to a White House...
Only a good guy with a knife can stop a bad guy with a...
The Head of the National Cutlery Association, Wayne La Cuillère, has lashed out at Donald Trump on Twitter this afternoon, after the US President...
Daily Mail Editor to pay Melania Trump $150m with no prospect of Happy Ending
The Editor of The Daily Mail was said to be gutted at the prospect of having to pay Melania Trump millions of dollars for...
Having dodgy dealings with corrupt foreign dictators is only bad when Hillary does it,...
Having Dodgy dealings with corrupt foreign dictators is only a bad thing when it is done by the likes of Hillary Clinton, Fox News...
Michael Flatley confirmed as world’s second biggest wanker
Rhino horn collector and jig enthusiast Michael Flatley confirmed today that he is the World's second biggest wanker after announcing he will perform a jig at Trump's Inauguration Ball.
Statue Of Liberty To Be Deported
America's creepiest uncle, State Department Obergruppenführer Steve 'Steve-O' Bannon confirmed today that steps were being taken to deport 'dangerous subversive' the Statue of Liberty.
"Ms...
Dumpster fires unhappy about comparisons to US Democracy
Skip fires around the world have declared they are unhappy with being compared to the US democratic process.
The United States to allow Guns to be purchased from Vending Machines
United States, Washington DC - A new bill has been passed in the United States, to allow firearms to be sold from Vending Machines....
