Donald Trump

I will sue my victims says Donald Trump

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Donald Trump has vowed to track down and sue all of his victims after the presidential elections.
Ivanka and Donald Trump

Donald Trump ends democracy in America

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I’ve decided Ivanka will come after me. I mean, she’s hot, and she has my gift with politics, so she’s the perfect choice

US celebrates Independence Day by ceding from Trump

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Secret delegations from the 50 states of the United States of America have agreed a plan to avoid the impeachment of Donald Trump as...

Light spectroscopy confirms Trump wears a toupee and it’s 70% alpaca

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Donald Trump's hair is partly fake, and the fake part is not even human hair, but alpaca, scientists working for NASA's Astronomical spectroscopy division...

When the world Trumps, you better dodge that draft

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Look at him. He’s the lad you thought was a prick at school but you still went round his house because he had a decent back garden for you to leck footy in. Except he was shit at it, and had right bad hayfever.

Obama rushed to hospital after biting through lip during Trump press conference

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President Barack Obama was rushed to hospital yesterday after sustaining injuries during a press conference. Herald reporter Scott McCracknee was there and describes what happened. "Mr...

Trump sues porn star for breaching confidentiality agreement about affair he claims not to...

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Lawyers for the actual President of the United States of America are seeking $20 million in damages from a porn star who he says...

UK “unsafe” says Trump as British Armed Police “Worst in the World”

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Donald Trump has declared Britain "unsafe for US Citizens" as the UK Armed Police have been named the worst in the World on the...

Man who works at institution he’s opposed to because he’s paid to says he...

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Nigel Farage, who said a month ago that he wouldn't pledge support for Trump, has appeared at a Trump rally to pledge support for...

Daily Mail Editor to pay Melania Trump $150m with no prospect of Happy Ending

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The Editor of The Daily Mail was said to be gutted at the prospect of having to pay Melania Trump millions of dollars for...

Trump credited with restoring American faith in Bush

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Donald Trump has been given credit for restoring America's faith in Bush. One Bush expert told us, "10 years ago American faith in Bush was...

Conspiracy theorists concerned nobody might be in charge after all

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American conspiracy theorists heads are exploding at an alarming rate as the two main presidential candidates get more and more terrible. "Up until yesterday I was...

Nuclear Football replaced with state of the art 1979 Speak and Spell

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The Secret Service and senior members of the National Security Council have taken drastic steps to toughen US Nuclear launch protocols during Donald Trump's presidency by replacing the Nuclear Football with 1979 Speak and Spell.
Sarah Huckabee

Trump to sue publisher of Fire and Fury when Sarah Huckabee finishes reading it...

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Washington DC - Donald Trump has angrily announced that he intends to sue the publisher of The White House tell all book, Fire and...

Election Was Rigged Claims Trump – Recount Demanded

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Donald Trump has sensationally claimed that the 2016 US Presidential Election was rigged and he is demanding a recount.

Online petition to impeach Trump gets 6 billion signatures in 24 hours

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An online petition requesting that Donald Trump be removed from office has got 6 billion signatures from around the world within 24 hours of...

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