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Modern Day Presidential latest euphemism for complete and utter numpty, say linguists

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As Humpty Dumpty said, "When I use a word, it means whatever I want it to mean." Clearly in a world of self-reductible horseshit,...

All guns to be armed with guns

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In the wake of the latest mass shooting of innocent people to take place on U.S. soil, the National Rifle Association has issued a...

Hillary Clinton’s ‘Human Suit’ malfunctions at 911 memorial service

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The Presidential frontrunners cybernetic 'human suit' momentarily glitched at the recent 911 memorial service at ground zero yesterday, the third time this has happened...
Pumpkin

Halloween pumpkin mistaken for President Trump

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The embarrassing incident occurred after Ivanka left the pumpkin in the Oval Office. A meeting of President Trump’s closest advisors failed to realise that...
Dumpster Fire

Dumpster fires unhappy about comparisons to US Democracy

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Skip fires around the world have declared they are unhappy with being compared to the US democratic process.
Children Running

Teaching children to Zig Zag best way to avoid school shooting fatalities, say NRA

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In the wake of yet another mass school shooting in the USA the National Rifle Association have suggested that the tragedy could have been...
Fuck

Seriously?

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I mean, just....Fuck,  Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck.  A spokesman for minorities everywhere said; "Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck...
Ladder

Trump’s view on border wall evolves after learning the word ‘ladder’

8
Donald Trump has sensationally dropped his controversial border wall plan, a key election promise, after seeing one of his Mexican labourers use a ladder for the first time.

Trump Introduces 2020 Presidential Campaign Mascot

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President Trump took to the stage in Nuremberg, Florida, on Saturday in front of a crowd seen from space, to unveil his mascot for...

Racist Republicans deny that their voting districts are racist

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Republicans in North Carolina deny that their voting districts were drawn up based on race. After the Supreme Court ruled 5-3 that the boundaries were...

Leaked memo from US Embassy in London written in Crayon

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There has been shock amongst diplomatic circles this morning after a leaked memo written in crayon from the US Ambassador in London revealed that...

Trump Train derailed by Reddit

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Would-be U.S.President and serial bigot, Donald Trump awoke this morning to find his dreams of becoming the most powerful man on the planet in...
Harvey Weinstein

Harvey Weinstein apologises for James Corden jokes

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Hollywood millionaire Harvey Weinstein has said he is "truly sorry" for cracking jokes about James Corden at a black tie charity dinner in Los...
Putin Tillerson

Putin sacks head of US State Department Rex Tillerson

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WASHINGTON - The leader of the United States, President Vladimir Putin, announced Tuesday morning that he had fired his Secretary State Rex Tillerson and...

Trump Team Dismiss 9 Year-Old ‘Body Swap’ Claims

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A spokesperson for Donald Trump has described as “absurd” claims being made by a Wisconsin couple that the President-elect is actually their 9 year-old son.  Mike and...
Donald Trump Jr

Fire at Trump Tower definitely not Donald Trump Jr burning Russia dossier, confirms Donald...

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New York - There has been more fire and fury today as a blaze at the top of Trump Tower in New York left...

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