Queen’s Christmas speech will contain one paragraph in Urdu

0
There are rumours today that the Queen's Christmas speech will contain one paragraph in Urdu. A furious Palace insider told us, "It's completely ridiculous. I've...

Thousands gather in North Yorkshire to see world’s first completely empty Biro

0
There is more travel misery anticipated for the rest of the week as tens of thousands of people are expected to continue making their...
Theresa May

Theresa May accused of muttering in parliament “fuck em, let em starve”

0
Theresa May was accused of muttering the words "fuck em, let em starve" in parliament on Wednesday. May appeared to mutter the words during a...

Fears for local man missing in Ikea

0
Fears were increasing today for an intrepid, brave, noble man who has been missing in Ikea for 14 days. Steve Dickinson from Dukinfield...
Chris Grayling

Chris Grayling awards ferry contract to Nigerian Prince after receiving fortuitous email

0
Transport Secretary, Chris Grayling has announced that the Government have awarded a contract to provide ferries in the event of a no-deal Brexit. Grayling, the...
Donald Trump

Trump tells CNN all future press conferences will be held in Saudi Embassy

0
POTATUS has announced that he will begin to give CNN press conferences in Saudi Embassies from now on. The announcement comes as his administration complained...

Expenses scandal as Jeremy Corbyn claims £30,000 for Hi5 tuition

0
Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn has been embarrassed again this week, as he miss-judged yet another high five. Last week the allotment gardening marxist patted fellow MP...
Who Shot JR

Trump to release fresh evidence that Obama shot JR

0
The so-called "President" of the United States has ordered the CIA release all of the files relating to the attempted assassination of Texan oil...

Elderly Leave voter mistakes Hovis advert for childhood memories

30
An elderly leave voter has been telling the Herald about his childhood and it's very similar to the Hovis advert. Roy Bader, 72, who's never...
Factory Fire

Explosion in Burnley pie factory causes £3.14159265359 of damage

0
Since the early 1970s, the Trivial Piesuits factory has been a welcome source of employment, nourishment, and scent for Burnley residents. The squat factory unit,...
The Queen

Queen announces Prince Harry will become King of the USA following wedding to Meghan...

0
The Queen has announced that she exercise her right to crown Prince Harry and Meghan Markle King and Queen of the USA. During the announcement...

Rochdale man jailed for putting milk in tea before taking out teabag

0
A Rochdale man has been jailed for seven years for crimes against tea, it has been reported today. Steve Dickinson, 42 and a bit, was...

First shipment of thoughts and prayers for mass shooting victims arrive in California

0
It's all better in California now after a much needed vital shipment of thoughts and prayers arrived in Gilroy following today's mass shooting. "Yeah, we're...

Inner city youths escape prison for dogfighting by wearing red jackets and calling people...

0
Inner-city police are warning of the rise of a brutal new "sport" among the working classes, a savage, twisted parody of the fine ancient...

Ugly scenes at Rochdale Waitrose as supplies of Chateau Lafite de Rothschild 2009 run...

25
There were frantic scenes of violence and looting yesterday morning after Waitrose ran out of the 2009 vintage of the Chateau Lafite de Rothschild. Customers...
Annoyed Cat

Dead mouse on kitchen floor is a warning, not a gift

0
The dead animals that the cat has been dragging in from the garden are not gifts, they’re warnings cats have confirmed. Fluffles the cat, from...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts