UKIP appoint woman who put that cat in wheelie bin as advisor on cat...
The collection of gammon faced halfwits known as the UK Independence party has appointed the internationally famous cat abuser Mary Bale as an advisor...
Middle-class mums save planet by driving to Waitrose in massive Range Rovers to buy...
Middle class mums all over the Home Counties are being credited with a reversal to the effects of Global Warming after tens of thousands...
The Queen asks Merkel to form a government
Her Majesty the Queen is expected to travel to Berlin later today to ask German Chancellor Angela Merkel to form a government for the...
Emergency ‘Thoughts and Prayers’ cabinets to be installed in every American classroom by 2020
The US Department of Education has revealed plans to install emergency 'Thoughts and Prayers' cabinets in every school classroom by the year 2020.
The announcement...
Piers Morgan killed in chip pan fire
In breaking news Piers Morgan has burned to death in a devasting chip pan fire in a static caravan at Hollingsworth Lake Caravan Park
It’s definitely CHRISTMAS – Big Fat Secret Santa buys 13,500 presents worth £97,952
It is definitely Christmas you unbelievably charitable and hilarious lunatics.
You crazy people have now bought £98,000 worth of presents for 13,500 kids and teenagers...
Fred and Rose distance themselves from Kanye
The solicitor for the notorious murderers Fred and Rose West have released a statement saying that Mrs West and her deceased husband are 'in...
Britain First blame Foreigner for it being Cold As Ice
We don't care if you've heard this joke before, because for us, it Feels Like The First Time.
Dirty White Boy fan club Britain First...
Big Ben to be renamed Massive Mohammed from 2018
Equality campaigners have welcomed plans to rename Big Ben as part of a project celebrating London's rich cultural heritage.
The famous landmark, which is due...
Outrage as Paddington Bear deported back to Peru
Much loved star of children's literature, TV and films, Paddington Bear, has been arrested and deported to Peru, as part of a round up of...
No arrests made as gang of white people chase group of black men through...
Reports are coming in of a civil disturbance in London which has seen a mob of almost 40,000 white people chase a small group...
I married him for rugged good looks and winning personality claims Melania Trump
Melania Trump has gone on the record to tell the world that she married Donald Trump not for his money but his rugged good looks, winning personality and his open minded views on immigration.
Farage in critical condition after fall at a supporters meeting
Nigel Farage is in hospital today after coming to the defence of ludicrously abhorrent comments made about women by Donald Trump.
Ugly scenes at Rochdale Waitrose as supplies of Chateau Lafite de Rothschild 2009 run...
There were frantic scenes of violence and looting yesterday morning after Waitrose ran out of the 2009 vintage of the Chateau Lafite de Rothschild.
Customers...
Prince Philip deemed fit to work after ATOS work capability assessment
Prince Philip has today gone under the knife for surgery on his dodgy hip.
However 30 minutes later he was deemed fit to work in an...
Florence and Dougal quit UK over Brexit fears
In a shock move, Magic Roundabout stars Florence and Dougal have announced they are quitting the UK to move back to their native France...
