Saudi woman celebrates being able to drive to friends stoning
A Saudi woman has been telling the Rochdale Herald how she's looking forward to being allowed to drive to the stoning of a woman...
Fred and Rose distance themselves from Kanye
The solicitor for the notorious murderers Fred and Rose West have released a statement saying that Mrs West and her deceased husband are 'in...
Cute dog is a savage little shit
A survey of very cute little dogs has discovered that almost 99.9% of them are in fact savage little bastards.
The survey which was carried...
I’m not an immigrant, I’m British says Britain First supporter who lives on the...
When asked what he would describe himself as, as an Englishman abroad, he will usually say
something like: “Im an export int I”
Dead burglar to get state funeral
A Rochdale burglar who was killed whilst at work will receive a state funeral.
Councillor Tom Walsh said, "This man wasn't any old burgular. He...
Town centres full of fat topless pricks for some reason
Town centres are chock full of topless, pasty white fat pricks for some reason according to sources.
For some reason thousands upon thousands of fat...
Satire Aid has bought 3,500 presents worth more than £31,000!
A quick Satire Aid update for you. The amazing readers of The Rochdale Herald, NewsThump, Tuckered, U Ok Hun and Angry People in Local...
Colonists on LV-426 excited after discovery of Easter eggs
Colonists on the Terraforming, research and mining colony Hadley's Hope have discovered what appears to be a large amount of Easter eggs in a...
Animals vote that MPs can’t feel pain or emotion
Following rejection by Parliament of the EU treaty to recognise animals as sentient beings, The Rochdale Herald has learned of a reaction by the...
Corbyn confirmed as ‘not Messiah, but a very naughty boy’
In a shock revelation today, it has been confirmed that the Labour leader and General Election candidate Jeremy Corbyn is not in fact the...
Britain First’s Paul Golding to release prison memoir ‘My Struggul’
In tribute to the rabidly anti-Jewish fascist Adolf Hitler, the rabidly anti-Muslim fascist Paul Golding, former leader of Britain First, is doing a sponsored...
How do we fill workhouses with vulnerable children to “take care of” now, asks...
The Roman Catholic Church is in crisis today after Ireland voted decisively to repeal one of the world's most restrictive abortion bans.
The church is...
VICTORY! I am a racist, not a druggie says Hopkins
Katie Hopkins is celebrating her racist and drug-free status tonight, it has been confirmed.
Hopkins, 67, made a complaint to the Independent Press Standards Organisation...
Women in Burkhas look ridiculous, says man who looks like an overweight mop
Boris Johnson has once again found himself under fire due to comments he made likening women who wear Burqas and Niqabs in appearance to...
Prince Harry arrested in Windsor for aggressive begging to pay for wedding
Windsor-- Following complaints of aggressive begging on the streets of Windsor today Prince Harry was among the vagrants swept up in a Thames Police...
Yulia Skripal leaves Zizzi’s Salisbury 1 star TripAdvisor review
Yulia Skripal has left her first TripAdvisor review since being poisoned last month.
Ms Skripal said, "I was in the country visiting my father in...




















































