Scientists confounded after man who left coat on still felt the benefit

0
Scientists around the globe are reeling this afternoon after a Rochdale man who didn’t take his coat off this morning still felt the benefit of wearing a coat when he went outside for a cigarette this afternoon.

Packham challenges Attenborough in bid to become BBC Natural History Unit alpha male

0
Chris Packham has challenged Sir David Attenborough in a bid to become the BBC Natural History Unit's alpha male. In a display that witnesses have...
Katie Hopkins

VICTORY! I am a racist, not a druggie says Hopkins

0
Katie Hopkins is celebrating her racist and drug-free status tonight, it has been confirmed. Hopkins, 67, made a complaint to the Independent Press Standards Organisation...
Burkina

Outrage as women flout Burkini ban on Rochdale beach

110
Police were called yesterday afternoon after a large group of women were caught flouting the controversial "Burkini Ban" on Rochdale's world famous Stansfield Beach. Members...
Old Graduate

University of Life under Ofsted investigation after turning out complete fucking idiots

83
Chief Ofsted inspector Mark Teachers announced today he would be launching a special investigation into the University of Life, based in Thanet. A lower-level investigation...

Burnley Lidl selling Father’s Day Cards in packs of five

0
With Father's Day fast approaching, supermarkets and stationary stores across the country are displaying cards and gifts for children to give to their father this Sunday. Burnley Lidl has raised a few eyebrows with its five card bundle offer.

Home Office confirms that new blue UK passports will be HALAL-CERTIFIED

0
The Home Office has confirmed that the United Kingdom's post-Brexit passport covers will be halal-certified. The iconic Royal blue cover, which is due to be...
Countryfile

BBC Countryfile Filming Suspended After Presenter Gets Parking Ticket

0
Filming of cutting edge BBC show Countryfile was dramatically suspended last night after one of the presenters was accused of parking illegally. Previously well respected...

Couple still at bottle bank

0
A Rochdale couple is now entering their third day of disposing of bottles at their local bottle bank.

Scientists admit Rees-Mogg is experiment to create the perfect twat

0
There was mild surprise today, as the lid was blown off a secret program revealing that Tory MP Jacob Rees-Mogg was the product of...
Shouty man

We won, get over it! voted 2017 Phrase of the Year by racists

0
We won, get over it! has become the new mantra of choice for racists, according to the results of a new survey published today. The...
Theresa May

Winning a general election easier than taking benefits from orphans says woman who took...

0
Like the irritating eager new guy at work, dark Sith Lord and unelected PM, Theresa May, announced a snap general election 15 minutes before...

Jeremy Corbyn under investigation after making vicar’s daughter cry during hustings

29
Leftist wheat-eater Jeremy Corbyn came under fire from his own back-benchers today, after being accused of making a girl cry, and not just any...
Earl Grey

Earl Grey tea is actually horrible, admit people who drink it

0
A woman from Rochdale has admitted that she doesn't really like Earl Grey tea because it tastes horrible. Winifred Barbarella from Milnrow (35 and three...

Woman doesn’t dick about with thermostat

0
A woman from Rochdale has taken the extraordinary decision to not dick about with the central heating thermostat. Barbara Dickinson responded to the fact that...

Shop selling stuff people don’t buy goes into administration, again

0
People in Rochdale have been speaking of the shock at discovering HMV has collapsed again. Many thought it had gone bust years ago. Stan...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts