Brexit Party MEPs accidentally turn to face Mecca during national anthem
Brexit Party MEPs have apologised to their racists after accidentally turning to face Mecca as the European Parliament returned.
"It was an honest mistake and...
Thousands of Leave voters dead after do not drink labels removed from bottles of...
Several hundred thousand leave voters have died from drinking bleach in the last few days after labels, required under EU health and safety rules,...
Met Office alert after sighting of Geordie woman wearing jacket in Newcastle
The Met Office has issued an almost unprecedented weather warning this evening after it was reported a woman was spotted on a night out in Newcastle city centre wearing a jacket.
Thirty nine bus seats arrested in counter-terrorism operation
In what police are describing as a “significant” counter-terrorism operation, thirty nine bus seats were arrested today on suspicion of being involved in jihadist...
ISIS and UN unite to condemn So-Called Yodel Customer Services for crimes against humanity
ISIS and all the member states of the United Nations have broadly condemned the British parcel delivery firm and courier service Yodel for crimes against humanity.
Dominic Raab announces sanctions on Isle of Aran
Foreign Secretary, Dominic Raab has announced sanctions on the Isle of Aran. Mr Raaab announced the sanctions during a visit to Blackpool Tower in...
First year student can’t wait to get home to tell her pony all about...
A first year student at the University of Bristol is said to be very excited about getting home for Christmas so she can tell...
Saudi woman celebrates being able to drive to friends stoning
A Saudi woman has been telling the Rochdale Herald how she's looking forward to being allowed to drive to the stoning of a woman...
Couple looking forward to annual tedious night out, in dreadful nightclub with hideous people
A middle aged Rochdale couple are reportedly giddy with excitement about their annual tedious night out in a horrible club with hideous people tonight.
Barbara...
Dead burglar to get state funeral
A Rochdale burglar who was killed whilst at work will receive a state funeral.
Councillor Tom Walsh said, "This man wasn't any old burgular. He...
Just £3 a month will pay for cocaine and child prostitutes for an Oxfam...
A new fundraising campaign from Oxfam appealing to the better nature of child abusers is asking for just £3 a month to pay for...
Burnley announces plans to be available in colour by 2022
Burnley Council has announced plans for town to be available in colour from 2022.
Just the Town Centre will be effected initially. The announcement...
Conservative Christmas Party cancelled after failing to negotiate piss up deal with brewery
There was despair throughout the Conservative Party today after government officials announced that the annual Christmas do has been cancelled.
The news comes after many...
Now that passports are blue again I might get one, says 50 year old...
A fifty year old racist fuckwit has told The Rochdale Herald that he is over the moon that passports are now going to be...
Jeremy Corbyn urges Labour MP’s to get behind Theresa May or risk making him...
Jeremy Corbyn has told Labour MP's that they had better get behind Theresa May and her, "And then there were none" vision of Brexit...
Tommy Robinson arrested outside Big Brother house for live streaming name of 1st evictee
Police were called by the bigwigs at Channel 5 today to have self proclaimed journalist and all round twat Tommy Robinson removed from outside...
