Rochdale man jailed for putting milk in tea before taking out teabag

0
A Rochdale man has been jailed for seven years for crimes against tea, it has been reported today. Steve Dickinson, 42 and a bit, was...
Cyclist

Bloke with shaved legs and huge collection of children’s toys denies mid-life crisis

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A Bloke with shaved legs and huge collection of children's toys denies mid-life crisis. A forty two year old man from Rochdale who shaves his...

Men warned not to date clever & pretty girls who might get “a bit...

55
A Judge has warned men that they only have themselves to blame if they date very clever, very pretty girls who are "a bit...

People who make flammable models to face higher standard of justice than people who...

0
The people who burnt a model of the Grenfell tower on bonfire should face a much higher standard of justice than the people who...

Inner city youths escape prison for dogfighting by wearing red jackets and calling people...

0
Inner-city police are warning of the rise of a brutal new "sport" among the working classes, a savage, twisted parody of the fine ancient...

DUP offer to support May if she kicks Bishop Brennan up the arse

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The Democratic Unionist Party has offered to support Theresa May's minority government on the condition that she kicks Bishop Brennan up the arse, according...
Theresa May

Theresa May to raise voting age to 35

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Senior Tory advisors, still reeling from Thursday's disastrous election result which provided a hung parliament, are said today to be telling the prime minister Theresa May that something serious has to be done about Britain's broken electoral system.

Thousands gather in North Yorkshire to see world’s first completely empty Biro

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There is more travel misery anticipated for the rest of the week as tens of thousands of people are expected to continue making their...
Trump

You had some very fine people on both sides, Trump tells D-Day veterans

Donald Trump has told D-Day veterans that there were very fine people on both sides of the battles to control the Normandy Beaches during...

Trading Standards to prosecute Gastro Pub for using plates

34
A new gastro pub, The Pissed Idiot, in Rochdale is under investigation by trading standards after allegedly serving food on actual plates rather than...
Corbyn

Jeremy Corbyn branded anti-Semitic after celebrating crucifixion of Jewish man

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Jeremy Corbyn has been forced to deny further allegations of anti-Semitism after being spotted celebrating the crucifixion of a Jewish man. The Jewish man in...
Putin

Vladimir Putin wins Great Russian Bake-off after other contestants fall ill

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Vladimir Putin has won the Russian version of Celebrity Great British Bake-off after all the other contestants sadly died in tragic but mysterious circumstances. Mr...
trump salute

Donald Trump autobiography ‘My Struggle’ set for December release

2
A spokesman for Donald Trump has announced that the eagerly anticipated Trump autobiography is set for release in early December just in time for...
Corbyn

Jeremy Corbyn urges Labour MP’s to get behind Theresa May or risk making him...

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Jeremy Corbyn has told Labour MP's that they had better get behind Theresa May and her, "And then there were none" vision of Brexit...
Boris Johnson

Leave means Leave says Boris Johnson’s Girlfriend

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Boris Johnson's girlfriend has apparently told a befuddled Boris Johnson that leave means leave during a heated row at her flat in the early...

Judge insists stabbing people is fine provided you’re rich and pretty

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A Judge set a legal precedent today after ruling that stabbing someone is fine provided you are blonde, twenty four, have a posh name, great...

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