Scientists confounded after man who left coat on still felt the benefit

0
Scientists around the globe are reeling this afternoon after a Rochdale man who didn’t take his coat off this morning still felt the benefit of wearing a coat when he went outside for a cigarette this afternoon.
Riot Police

Police called after man without tattoo spotted in Rochdale town centre

26
There was a commotion on Drake Street in Rochdale this afternoon as crowds of people gathered from all corners of the town to gaze...
Sturgeon

Will of the Scottish People Revealed to be Sturgeon’s Imaginary Friend

10
An SNP insider has revealed that Nicola Sturgeon's repeated use of the phrase 'Will of the Scottish People' is actually a reference to her...

Expenses scandal as Jeremy Corbyn claims £30,000 for Hi5 tuition

0
Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn has been embarrassed again this week, as he miss-judged yet another high five. Last week the allotment gardening marxist patted fellow MP...
Farm Animals

Animals vote that MPs can’t feel pain or emotion

0
Following rejection by Parliament of the EU treaty to recognise animals as sentient beings, The Rochdale Herald has learned of a reaction by the...
Bob Geldof

Sanctimonious tax avoiding ex-pat hands back key to city he doesn’t live in for...

0
London-dwelling sanctimonious tax-avoider Bob Geldof has said he will return his Freedom of the City of Dublin. Geldof, a remarkably rich registered non-dom who pays...

Saudi woman celebrates being able to drive to friends stoning

0
A Saudi woman has been telling the Rochdale Herald how she's looking forward to being allowed to drive to the stoning of a woman...

World in shock as man with history of taking steroids runs faster than bloke...

The World is in shock today after a bloke who has a well documented history of taking performance enhancing drugs ran a bit faster than a bloke who doesn't.
Burkina

Outrage as women flout Burkini ban on Rochdale beach

110
Police were called yesterday afternoon after a large group of women were caught flouting the controversial "Burkini Ban" on Rochdale's world famous Stansfield Beach. Members...
Tommy Robinson

Tommy Robinson arrested outside Big Brother house for live streaming name of 1st evictee

0
Police were called by the bigwigs at Channel 5 today to have self proclaimed journalist and all round twat Tommy Robinson removed from outside...
Trump

You had some very fine people on both sides, Trump tells D-Day veterans

Donald Trump has told D-Day veterans that there were very fine people on both sides of the battles to control the Normandy Beaches during...

Dead burglar to get state funeral

0
A Rochdale burglar who was killed whilst at work will receive a state funeral.  Councillor Tom Walsh said, "This man wasn't any old burgular. He...
Donald Trump has a gold leaf living room yet tells the government he doesn't pay tax because you would waste it

Man with solid gold living room tells government “I don’t pay tax because you...

1
A man who owns a solid gold living room reportedly told one hundred million of his closest friends that he doesn't pay Tax in...

Wayne Rooney to be donated to Beijing zoo footballer breeding program

18
Manchester United have announced that they are donating the footballer Wayne Rooney to Beijing zoo. The footballer who has been increasingly marginalised this season will...
Passports

Now that passports are blue again I might get one, says 50 year old...

0
A fifty year old racist fuckwit has told The Rochdale Herald that he is over the moon that passports are now going to be...
Boris Johnson

Boris Johnson launches ‘Free Robert Mugabe’ campaign

0
The campaign is headed up by Boris Johnson who is thought to believe that if it's successful he could be the leader of Zanu...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts