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Workman spotted doing some work on the £15BN M62 Roadworks

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The bloke who is doing all the work on the £15BN M62 road improvement scheme has been spotted on site for the first time...
Riot Police

Corner shop owner lynched by mob in Rochdale after caught selling Yorkshire Tea

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Marge Riley, 74, was confronted by an angry mob of local residents who objected to her display of Yorkshire Teas. “I just wanted to give...
Right-hand drive chaos

Yorkshire driving ban on women to be lifted

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The King of Yorkshire, His Majesty Geoffrey Boycott the first, has issued a decree allowing women to drive within the Sovereign state for the...
Wayne Rooney

Wayne Rooney moves from second best team in Manchester to second best team in...

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Thatched-roofed footballer Wayne Rooney was yesterday given away by the second best team in Manchester to the second best team in Liverpool. He moves...

Jim Bowen to be placed in burning speedboat in viking funeral

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Jim Bowen, the comedian and inventor of darts is to receive a full viking funeral. Mr Bowen, who invented the game of "darts" in the...

ISIS and UN unite to condemn So-Called Yodel Customer Services for crimes against humanity

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ISIS and all the member states of the United Nations have broadly condemned the British parcel delivery firm and courier service Yodel for crimes against humanity.

Trump adds Germany to Travel Ban after hostages taken at Nakatomi Tower

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Donald Trump has added the populations of Germany and Austria to his controversial travel ban after hearing reports that terrorists have taken hostages at the Nakatomi Tower in Los Angeles, again.

Irish Garda stalk Stephen Hawking in Richard Dawkins blasphemy mix up

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After the recent news that Stephen Fry is to be stoned to death by Irish authorities for calling God 'a bit of dick', the Irish...

Daily Mail editor defends decision to exclude Gold medallist with alopecia from cover

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The editor at the Daily Mail has allegedly defended his decision to only put two of the gold medalists from the four woman, world...

Cute dog is a savage little shit

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A survey of very cute little dogs has discovered that almost 99.9% of them are in fact savage little bastards. The survey which was carried...
Love

You don’t know what love is ’til you hold your baby for the first...

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Forget looking into your bride's eyes on your wedding day, you don't know what love is until you become a parent and hold your...

Daily Mail Readers confused more toddlers haven’t walked alone to UK from Syria

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Daily Mail Readers are confused more toddlers haven't walked the 2,000 miles to Calais from Syria.
Elmer Fudd

Elmer Fudd resigns as Home Secretary

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The Home Secretary Elmer Fudd has resigned, Downing Street has said. Mr Fudd, was due to make a Commons Statement on Monday about the Windrush...

Scientists admit Rees-Mogg is experiment to create the perfect twat

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There was mild surprise today, as the lid was blown off a secret program revealing that Tory MP Jacob Rees-Mogg was the product of...

Ugly scenes at Rochdale Waitrose as supplies of Chateau Lafite de Rothschild 2009 run...

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There were frantic scenes of violence and looting yesterday morning after Waitrose ran out of the 2009 vintage of the Chateau Lafite de Rothschild. Customers...

Canada and Mexico to build border walls if World Bank will fund a lid

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The governments of Canada and Mexico reached an historic agreement today to build 50 foot tall walls along their borders with the US on the proviso that the World Bank lends them the money for a lid.

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