Kevin the Carrot beheaded by Muslims.
Popular TV carrot Kevin was among a bag of carrots snatched from the Oldham branch of Aldi by ruthless Muslim gang the 'Iqbal family'.
The...
Northerner brings Kraft Slices to cheese and wine party in Surrey
A disgraced Northerner has been barred from ever returning to the South, after he humiliated his sister at a bourgeoisie Cheese & Wine evening...
Bloke with shaved legs and huge collection of children’s toys denies mid-life crisis
A Bloke with shaved legs and huge collection of children's toys denies mid-life crisis.
A forty two year old man from Rochdale who shaves his...
Piers Morgan quits Good Morning Britain to reprise Pigeon Lady role in Home Alone...
Piers Morgan has reportedly quit Good Morning Britain this week in order to reprise his award-winning role of Pigeon Lady in the Home Alone...
Thirty nine bus seats arrested in counter-terrorism operation
In what police are describing as a “significant” counter-terrorism operation, thirty nine bus seats were arrested today on suspicion of being involved in jihadist...
Americans horrified to learn what the word ‘amendment’ means
As hillbillies, rednecks and evangelical Christian right wing crackpots continue to celebrate the last thrashings of America's hold on reality with their ongoing support...
Boris Johnson launches ‘Free Robert Mugabe’ campaign
The campaign is headed up by Boris Johnson who is thought to believe that if it's successful he could be the leader of Zanu...
World in shock after professional boxer wins boxing match against amateur boxer
The sporting world is in disarray this morning after an unbeaten professional boxer won a boxing match against a bloke who hadn't had a...
Former military cadet fulfils lifelong ambition to visit Vietnam despite agonisingly debilitating bonespurs
A former military cadet has finally fulfilled his dream to visit Vietnam despite suffering from debilitating bonespurs.
The man, now in his seventies, is said...
Dominic Raab warns against travel to Iran and other Scandinavian countries
The foreign secretary Dominic Raab has warned British nationals not to travel to Iran or any other Scandinavian countries following last week's US airstrikes...
You lost get over it, Jacob Rees-Mogg told
Jacob Rees-Mogg has been told to get over losing the no confidence vote in Theresa May last night.
Mr Rees-Mogg heads the European Research Group...
Canada and Mexico to build border walls if World Bank will fund a lid
The governments of Canada and Mexico reached an historic agreement today to build 50 foot tall walls along their borders with the US on the proviso that the World Bank lends them the money for a lid.
Israel celebrates Eurovision win by bombing Gaza strip
Israel has celebrated winning the Eurovision song contest with a massive aerial bombardment of the Gaza Strip and shooting dead some Palestinian civilians.
Nine Palestinian...
Christmas ruined as Santa fails CRB check
Christmas may be cancelled as Santa has failed to get his CRB check renewed.
The revelation came last night when a Government Spokesperson said, "Santa...
Men warned not to date clever & pretty girls who might get “a bit...
A Judge has warned men that they only have themselves to blame if they date very clever, very pretty girls who are "a bit...
Muslims should respect our laws, says racist in prison for breaking our laws
Today crowds of nearly a few dozen have gathered outside Downing Street armed with Placards stating "free are Tommy" and two Netto bags full...
