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When asked what he would describe himself as, as an Englishman abroad, he will usually say something like: “Im an export int I”

Daily Mail Readers are confused more toddlers haven't walked the 2,000 miles to Calais from Syria.

Angela Merkel, the German Chancellor, is due to meet with Theresa May later today to spit in her face and tell her to piss...

Allegations have recently arisen that Conservative MP and incumbent minister of the cabinet office, Damian Green MP had been browsing and downloading 'thousands' of...

We won, get over it! has become the new mantra of choice for racists, according to the results of a new survey published today. The...

Ruddy faced racists up and down the country are said to have mixed feelings about England getting through to the World Cup Semi Finals...

Sajid Javid has accidentally deported himself to Pakistan. A Home Office spokesman said, "Mr Javid has said that a hard Brexit is a good thing...

Inner-city police are warning of the rise of a brutal new "sport" among the working classes, a savage, twisted parody of the fine ancient...

Melania Trump has gone on the record to tell the world that she married Donald Trump not for his money but his rugged good looks, winning personality and his open minded views on immigration.

Researchers at Rochdale Community University have concluded that people who "tell it like it is" are invariably complete arseholes. "People who 'tell it like it...

Lewis Hamilton has upset slums all over the world by comparing them to Stevenage. The five-time Formula 1 world champion made the faux pas while...

The government announced this morning that Chief Brexit negotiator David Davis is to be replaced by two short planks. It's believed the replacement of Mr....

Researchers at the esteemed Rochdale Community University have published a study today revealing that fool-proof satire is still not fool-proof.  "We gave some angry morons...

Sad little wankers have today expressed dismay that their plans to sow fear into our communities and bring about the downfall of society have...

A Rochdale couple is now entering their third day of disposing of bottles at their local bottle bank.

London commuters forced open the doors of a packed rush hour tube train yesterday bringing the train to a complete standstill and causing power...