The Queen asks Merkel to form a government
Her Majesty the Queen is expected to travel to Berlin later today to ask German Chancellor Angela Merkel to form a government for the...
Mixed feelings for Tommy Robinson supporters as bloke called Ali puts England into semi...
Ruddy faced racists up and down the country are said to have mixed feelings about England getting through to the World Cup Semi Finals...
Trump to release fresh evidence that Obama shot JR
The so-called "President" of the United States has ordered the CIA release all of the files relating to the attempted assassination of Texan oil...
Terror as scientists find link between Daily Mail and racist pensioners
Following an uncomfortable family dinner with her parents, local woman Karen Smith, 28, reported to friends yesterday that she fears mirroring their gradual decline...
What do you mean bride’s father pays? Asks Meghan Markle’s father before heart attack
It's been suggested that Meghan Markle's dad had a heart attack shortly after being told that the brides father should pay for his daughters...
Tommy Robinson wins coveted softest mouth in Hull prison award
Tommy Robinson has been voted HMP Hull's softest mouth award.
Mr Robinson will be awarded the prize in a ceremony to be held on the...
Royal Navy ordered to kill any f*cking Frenchman who so much as looks at...
10 Downing Street has ordered the Royal Navy to kill any f*cking Frenchman who so much as looks at a British fish.
The order has...
Tim Nice But Dim appointed UK Ambassador to the EU
In a surprise move Theresa May has appointed Tim Nice But Dim UK Amabassador to the EU.
Is Daily Mail Editor Paul Dacre the most flaccid cockgoblin in the UK?
Unsubstantiated sources allege Dacre is comfortably the vilest hate-peddling shitweasel in the UK.
Feel free to tell us if you disagree with these allegations. But...
People who make flammable models to face higher standard of justice than people who...
The people who burnt a model of the Grenfell tower on bonfire should face a much higher standard of justice than the people who...
After success with beavers in Scotland, trains to be reintroduced in South of England
Following the success of the reintroduction of beavers to Scotland, experts are planning to repeat the experiment with the rare and previously thought extinct...
Anger as ‘sexy Anjem Choudary’ costume outsells ‘sexy Tommy Robinson’ costume for first time
There were angry reactions across the UK today after it was revealed that a popular 'slutty Tommy Robinson' Halloween costume has been outsold by...
Sad wankers unable to even part a Londoner from his beer
Sad little wankers have today expressed dismay that their plans to sow fear into our communities and bring about the downfall of society have...
Walkers still putting cheese and onion crisps in wrong coloured bag
Walkers crisps have been told that they're putting cheese and onion crisps in the wrong coloured bag despite everyone knowing that they don't go...
If I’d wanted to smell of shampoo I wouldn’t have rolled in fox shit...
A Labrador Retriever from Rochdale was feeling aggrieved today after her owner callously pulled rank over her choice of fragrance.
Luna Goodgirl, aged 3, told...
Sex scandal latest – vicar says he was touched by God
In a startling new development in the ongoing revelations of sexual impropriety, Father Peter O'Fiall of St. Thomas the Dubious Roman Catholic Church in...
