Trump barred from White House toilets
President Donald Trump has been the first victim of his cancellation of orders compelling universities and other institutions to respect personal identity.
Although rescinding the orders was...
Donald Trump awarded prestigious Time Magazine Dickhead of the Year Award
Donald Trump has been awarded the Time Magazine prestigious Hitler of the Year Award and is said to be "honoured" by the accolade.
Donald’s diddy digits dodge draft
As the smokescreen around Donald Trump's draft dodging tactics intensifies The Rochdale Herald has uncovered startling new evidence.
The story currently being spun is that...
Gays seen boarding ark two by two in Texas saying ‘our work here is...
An ark has been spotted in Texas picking up a group of homosexuals who caused all the flooding there.
The findings have come as a...
David Duke retracts Trump endorsement saying no room for “locker room banter” in politics
In sensational news today David Duke, the former head of the Ku Klux Klan, has withdrawn his support for Republican Presidential Candidate Donald Trump.
OJ Simpson appointed White House press secretary
Tongues are wagging in Washington today over what seems too convenient for coincidence as OJ Simpson is rumoured about to be appointed as Sean...
He knew what he signed up for, says dickhead who doesn’t know what he...
Proving once and for all that sometimes the best thing to say is nothing, Donald Trump told the widow of a grieving soldier that...
National holiday declared as USA goes 6 days without mass shooting
This is the closest to a full week that the US has gone without a mass shooting since 'The Great Week of Peace' in...
Madame Tussauds new Trump wax work backs out of inauguration
Madame Tussauds have declined to exhibit their new Trump wax work at the impending inauguration on Friday.
Simon Wick, a spokesman for Tussauds said;
"Its nothing...
Hurricane Harvey considered least destructive 2020 presidential candidate
In an attempt to win back votes from the orange-painted tweeting shitangutan, the Democrats have turned to Hurricane Harvey to stand as their candidate...
Fat bottomed ape learns to mimic human sounds
Washington DC - A seventy year primitive primate that can mimic human words such as hello, bigly, braggadocios, and covfefe is thought to be...
Putin’s money was just resting in my account Trump tells James Comey
Donald Trump has dismissed as fake news any suggestion that money that has appeared in his account is anything to do with collusion with...
Stop calling people cocks you dick, White House HR Department tells Anthony Scaramucci
The White House HR Department has asked their latest recruit Anthony Scaramucci, the new White House Communications Director, to please, please, please stop calling...
Bad guys with guns get more practice complain good guys with guns
Good guys with guns in America went on the record this morning to complain they're unfairly getting a bad reputation after failing to prevent the 2078th successive mass shooting since 2,000.
Man with solid gold living room tells government “I don’t pay tax because you...
A man who owns a solid gold living room reportedly told one hundred million of his closest friends that he doesn't pay Tax in...
Man who works at institution he’s opposed to because he’s paid to says he...
Nigel Farage, who said a month ago that he wouldn't pledge support for Trump, has appeared at a Trump rally to pledge support for...
