US President Donald Trump has revealed that a DNA test shows “strong evidence” that he is distantly related to human beings.

He took the test after the Native American Democat Senator Elizabeth Warren taunted him in speeches, calling him  a “perma-tanned pig in a power suit.”

She has subsequently apologised to pigs.

The DNA test suggests Mr Trump has at least one human ancestor dating back between six and ten generations.

The test was conducted by acclaimed geneticist Carlos Bustamove of Stamford University.

“The vast majority of Mr Trump’s ancestry is feral pig, ape or rat. Which is surprising how intelligent pigs, apes and rats generally are.”

“But if you go back far enough it looks like one of Mr Trump’s ancestors might have fucked a human.”

“We’re thinking it was probably one of the pigs.”

Quentin D Fortesqueue is a founding editor of The Rochdale Herald. Part time amateur narcissist and full time satirist Quentin is never happier than when playing his lute and drinking a full bodied Bordeaux. He rarely plays the lute and never gets to drink Bordeaux.