Young people cause cancer Daily Mail warns
The Daily Mail has exclusively revealed that British youth is causing cancer.
In its article on the subject the Mail pointed out that British youths...
Sadiq Khan cracks down on junk food ads as thinner children harder to stab
Mayor plans to ban junk food adverts from Transport for London.
Mayor of London, Sadiq Khan, today announced a plan to ban junk food adverts...
Convertible car owner not as smug after leaving the top down last night
Sandra Numpton of Heywood has spent the last few days driving around in her convertible Mini Cooper, sun glasses on, hair in the wind,...
For Fuck’s Sake, sighs Britain
The entire United Kingdom muttered "for fuck's sake" in unision yesterday afternoon after learning that Boris Johnson has been "elected: new Conservative leader and...
Tory membership livid at Leadsom withdrawal
Tory Party Members up and down the country are reported to be livid that the withdrawal of Andrea Leadsom has robbed them of their...
Nick Clegg to run for leadership of Libdems
Nick Clegg has announced his intention of running for the leadership of the Liberal Democrats following the shock resignation of Tim Farron.
In a speech...
Definitely no division in Tory Party, says independent and unbiased media
There aren't any massive splits over the subject of Brexit or abandoned economic plans within the Conservative Party, reported media outlets through their silence...
Goldie melts down OBE to replace pawned gold tooth
DJ and alleged actor, Goldie, has vowed to melt down his MBE under the guise of moral outrage about some club somewhere closing down.
The...
UKIP Chairman claims “to play the piano in a whorehouse” on dating website
The Chairman of UKIP has been caught red faced after lying about his occupation on a dating site.
Paul Oakden claimed to "play a piano...
Panic over as Daily Mail assures everyone the fridge wasn’t bought by a white...
The Mail-online has sought to reassure readers that it was a slack-jawed, lazy, drunken black man who bought the fridge that started the Grenfell...
Rochdale primary school issues apology after asking kids to ‘black up’ for school play
Scandal has again rocked the beautiful town of Rochdale this morning when news came to us of a local school that remarkably asked its...
Labour, the Social DEMOCRATIC Party, takes more steps to prevent undesirables from voting
The National Executive Committee of the Labour Party has announced today that only those to the right of Tony Blair will be permitted to...
Electoral Reform Society mislays dictionary
The Electoral Reform Society has admitted they've lost the Collins Gem dictionary they had lying around the office a few weeks ago, making them...
Donald Trump to appoint Mr Muscle™ as his new Coronavirus advisor
In a move that has been described as both "batshit crazy" and "utterly, utterly mental", US President Donald Trump has revealed plans to appoint...
A1 renamed The Dominic Cummings Expressway
The A1(M) between Aberford and Durham has been officially redesignated the Dominic Cummings Expressway in recognition of its primary purpose of conveying the 'Special'...
Herald wins “Satirical Web Page of the Year”
It's a day of celebration at the Rochdale Herald as we are delighted to announce we have won Satirical Web Page of the Year...
