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LLocal woman Mia Wombley has been telling everyone she knows about the horrendous new legislation in Alabama.  Local senators, duelling their banjo strings, have asserted the importance of men to control women's bodies before,...

Nick Clegg has announced his intention of running for the leadership of the Liberal Democrats following the shock resignation of Tim Farron. In a speech from the corner of Downing Street Mr Clegg spoke of...

Vegans around the UK have unanimously voted to have Piers Morgan reclassified as a vegetable so that they can murder and eat him, according to reports. The news comes after gammon enthusiast, Piers Morgan, attacked...

Members of the VAR officials team for the Russia V Spain game have been speaking of their joy at being reunited with their families again. The reunification comes just days after the VAR wives and girlfriends (VAG) disappeared whilst...

The Daily Mail and The Daily Express have today announced that Britons will be expected to devote as much as 14 hours a day to hatred of Meghan Markle by the year 2021. Many...

Donald Trump has been asked to give up golf as he is tarnishing its reputation and attracting the wrong type of people into the game. Fat, white, affluent, vaguely racist, middle-aged golfers are appalled...

Former Defence Secretary, Gavin Williamson has declared war on schools mere hours after being appointed Education Secretary. His secret plan, which he immediately leaked, is to launch targeted drone strikes on underachieving schools as encouragement...

As you stagger to the bathroom in the morning, arriving before you remember you have knees, and try to get all your strikingly yellow piss in the bowl, even though you're a woman, it's...

Sir Antony Jay, the creator of Yes Minister has died taking with him UK satire. All we have left is the equivalent of a thousand news readers flinging their own excrement at a cardboard...

The verdict has been returned by the inquest into the tragic death of Will Winnet. The coroner Dr Howie Perished has ruled he was a 'victim of his own success'. The death of the serial...

Despite professing for weeks that he was much more oven ready than 'that Turkey Corbyn', the world's largest chicken has refused to leave a fridge in a hospital in Leeds. With shocking fowl language, a...

Students at Maple Hayes Dyslexia Scool in Lichfield have been celebrating incredible GCSE exam success. While many students couldn't read or write when they first attended the school almost 25% achieved A* to C grade...

Whenever election results don't go as hoped, there is always a chance that the downhearted will become the outright depressed.  Fortunately, Momentum organiser Mia Miah has managed to see the bright side. "Clearly, I am...

MP for Streatham, Chuka Umunna, has been forcibly removed from a branch of Laser Quest in Coventry for reportedly trying to join numerous children's parties. Mr Umunna was spotted helping himself to caterpillar cake and...

After undergoing five surgeries, changing his name by deed poll and buying a feather duster, there's no denying that Barry Conroy now bears more than a passing resemblance to his hero, Ken Dodd. "I got...

One's elected representatives are a complete shambles, One writes. One will not invite any of the proffered candidates to form a government. Instead one will lead the country oneself. In times of crisis a leader...