Heat from self-righteous can power the world
Scientists at the renowned Rochdale Community University's Social Physics department announced the discovery of a new energy source today.
“We discovered that the heat radiated...
Scientists confirm that builder’s tea is just tea
A team of scientists from Rochdale Community University have confirmed after years of extensive research that builder's tea is, in fact, just tea.
Clarence Tetley,...
5G blamed for amnesia as thousands of twats forget to be Islamophobic
Amidst growing concern from the internet's top pseudo-scientists about the risks posed by mobile technology, yet another coal has been added to the fire.
According...
Brian Cox concedes Earth is flat after spotting massive rounding error
Astrophysicists around or rather, across the world are in turmoil after Oldham-born pop-rock sensation, Professor Brian Cox today admitted that the Earth is...
NHS partner with WhatsApp to reboot IT project
In a move to reduce costs and breathe new life into the long-abandoned £11.4 billion Centralised Records System, the NHS has announced a partnership...
Scientists confirm tea tastes better when somebody else makes it
Researchers from Rochdale Community University have confirmed after years of extensive research that tea tastes loads better when somebody else has made it.
Maurice Tips,...
BBC in new accusations of bias
Following the release of a teaser for the upcoming Star Wars VIII documentary film, the BBC has been accused of heavy bias towards the...
Particle physicists admit Hadron Collider has caused slow end of universe
It is 2 years since the upgrade and usage of the Relativistic Heavy Ion Collider (RHIC) back in Feb 2014.
Concerns were raised by non-physicists...
Nobel Prize winning Physicist trying to delete U2’s album from iTunes
One of the winners of the 2019 Nobel Prize in Physics, Michel Mayor has told the Rochdale Herald that despite his award being announced...
Veganism can be cured claim scientists
Scientists at Bideford University have claimed that the recent epidemic of Veganism can be stopped if victims receive treatment in the early stages of...
Trump Outraged To Learn of Invention of Phonograph
Taking to Twitter, So Called President Trump rounded on critics of his
administration within the media, and their underhand strategy of recording stuff.
"Edison fake American....
Laptop finishes update in time for the weekend
An office worker in Rochdale is celebrating this evening after his laptop finally finished updating just in time for the weekend.
Dave Bloke from Milnrow...
5G spreads bullshit 10 times faster than 4G say experts
Some of Britain's top scientists have issued a stark warning ahead of the long-awaited rollout of 5G mobile networks across the country.
In an exclusive...
Supermoon is even bigger than your mum’s backside
Content creators and tabloids are celebrating this week as the Supermoon article market shows little sign of slowing.
"It's kinda the opposite of the so-called...
Tangled wires defy all laws of physics, confirm scientists
A study has proven that any one wire left unattended for 5 minutes, will tangle itself beyond the laws of physics.
The physics department of...
Scientist confirms it’s impossible to grow potato behind an ear
A top Agricultural scientist at Cambridge University has revealed that potatoes cannot grow behind or even in a persons earlobe. This shock news comes...
