Trident Subs: Gotta catch ’em all
Speaking at the Nato summit in Warsaw this week, David Cameron has hinted that almost £16bn ear-marked for the renewal of the Trident nuclear...
Robots refusing cyber attack vaccine due to autism fears
The UK's robots have told the Government that they will refuse a vaccine that provides protection from computer viruses, over fears it could cause...
Scientists confirm this is the weird parallel universe
After 2 years of unprecedented levels of worldwide idiocy, scientists have discovered that the parallel universe where weird shit happens is this one.
Popular...
Supermassive black hole found at the heart of the Conservative Party
Scientists working at Rochdale university announced Monday that they have proved the existence of supermassive black hole at the heart of the Conservative Party.
"Imagine...
A new Pokemon Go addition announced today is the Govey
The rare Pokemon can be found near knife drawers and can be evolved from its natural Tory stage, to raging Racist Govenator stage to...
Engineer designs pram that fits in boot of car
Rumours are circulating around the World's scientific community that the man who has designed a pram that fits in the boot of a car...
Scientists prove warm prosecco only explanation for Love Island
A scientific study has been released that shows that Love Island can only be explained by warm prosecco.
Dr Frederick Seddon of Rochdale college told...
Stephen Hawking hasn’t got a leg to stand on, says Jeremy Hunt
Health Secretary Jeremy C. Hunt has responded to Hawking's criticism of NHS reforms in a series of tweets, which are pompous even by Hunt's...
‘Childhood vaccines prolonged my agonising march towards death’ claims nihilist.
A local nihilist has started a campaign against vaccinations, arguing that they force children to endure the pain and sadness of their futile existence.
Stephen...
What’s so f*cking great about sliced bread ask furious genius inventors
The wheel, the lightbulb, combustion engine, space travel, and the internet all pale in comparison to pre-sliced bread according to public opinion.
"I created the...
Taking are speling back!
The new Apple iOS update is to include a new autocorrect function for words such as muslin, briton and rasict.
Computer giants and tax dodging...
Parents ask kids to surf net to find solution to spending too much time...
Fresh fears regarding the overuse of the internet by youngsters has emerged, with experts suggesting that it should be compared to fast food. The...
NHS partner with WhatsApp to reboot IT project
In a move to reduce costs and breathe new life into the long-abandoned £11.4 billion Centralised Records System, the NHS has announced a partnership...
Being a tosser won’t stop you getting rich, scientist claims
Anders Farkenobbviarrs, head of research at the Norway Institute of Selfish Prick-like Behavior in Trondheim said “Loads of rich, successful people are total fuckers,...
Outcry as Moon to get 4G before Burnley
There was protest in East Lancashire today, as plans by Vodafone & Nokia to launch a 4G mobile network on the lunar surface from...
NHS Test and Trace Centre discovered on Venus
A Rochdale resident has discovered the existence of an NHS Test and Trace Centre on the surface of Venus. Scientists believe that the existence...
