Taking are speling back!
The new Apple iOS update is to include a new autocorrect function for words such as muslin, briton and rasict.
Computer giants and tax dodging...
Christian groups OUTRAGED as Apple replace Christian emojis with Islamojis
The next update to Apple's iOS devices will feature almost 100 Islamic emojis, dubbed Islamojis, replacing almost all Christian iconography available on the iPhone...
Samsung to rebrand Galaxy as the Supernova
Samsung made a shock announcement at the weekends major technology event, TERD (Technology, Electronics RochDale), which was held at the former site of The...
Scientists warn against wearing Ukrainian underpants because Chernobyl Fallout
Scientists from the University of Kiev have issued a stark warning to people all over the world about the dangers of wearing Ukrainian undercrackers.
Britain to stop messing about and put the clocks back twenty years this October
Tony Blair woke this morning to find himself in the enviable position of a second chance at his legacy with the announcement the clocks...
20 a day smoker worried 5G mast will give him cancer
A Bolton man says he fears that 5 aside football pitch flood light is actually a secret 5G mast that will cause him to...
Stephen Hawking’s next book titled A Brief History of C*nts
Stephen Hawking is well regarded as the largest living brain in Britain and someone whose opinions are worth serious consideration, while Mr Hunt as something rather different.
Cats growing increasingly desperate to find cure for Coronavirus
Pet cats have announced that they're ramping up their efforts to find a cure for Coronavirus as many find they're now forced to spend...
Stephen Hawking hasn’t got a leg to stand on, says Jeremy Hunt
Health Secretary Jeremy C. Hunt has responded to Hawking's criticism of NHS reforms in a series of tweets, which are pompous even by Hunt's...
‘Shit dont stick to this, fam’ says Boris Johnson
Non-stick coating manufacturer Teflon has today announced a lucrative tie in with Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson.
The company is believed to have lined up an...
Microsoft to finally stop buggering about with Windows
Microsoft have announced today that they have finally finished fannying about with Windows and Microsoft Office.
The news has been met with widespread concern by...
Tests prove evolution has stopped among UKIP supporters
Groundbreaking research at Rochdale Technical University’s Institute of Genetic Engineering has confirmed that evolution has stopped working, and in some cases is being reversed,...
Facebook servers crash after everyone announces they’re drinking Prosecco
Facebook couldn't be logged into earlier today after millions of people updated their statuses with things like;
"The Prosecco is open! You know what that...
Farage either ‘Innumerate’ or ‘Hypocritical Dickwad’ says Brian Cox
Nigel Farage is either blind to numbers or being a massive hypocrite, according to Professor Brian Cox, the eminent almost-Rochdale scientist.
"Farage has spent months...
60 million Americans explore cryogenic freezing to escape Trump
With the ordeal of four years of President Trump looming over the horizon millions of Americans have applied to be cryogenically frozen for his term in...
Veganism can be cured claim scientists
Scientists at Bideford University have claimed that the recent epidemic of Veganism can be stopped if victims receive treatment in the early stages of...
