Science and Technology

White heat from the Technology News team: All the latest from the Rochdale and area tech scene

Daleks

Daleks to replace ‘exterminate’ slogan with ‘strong and stable’ for 2049 re-election bid.

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?Speaking from a neutral zone hyperdock, leader of the New Dalek Empire Theres- Sorry, Dalek Sec, said today that the bid for re-election in...

No Plans For Apple Tax to Just Rest in Irish Account 

The Irish government and their opposition are in agreement that they shouldn't have to tax corporations after an EU court suggested that perhaps Ireland...

Particle physicists admit Hadron Collider has caused slow end of universe

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It is 2 years since the upgrade and usage of the Relativistic Heavy Ion Collider (RHIC) back in Feb 2014.  Concerns were raised by non-physicists...

Patriots actually just thick twats scientists prove

Scientists at Rochdale's Community University have proven conclusively that people identifying themselves on social media as "Patriots" are actually just thick twats.

‘iPhone 7 best ever’ declare vacuous self obsessed brand whores

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We caught up with some douchebag in skinny jeans outside the Apple Store in the Arndale this afternoon: "I've been queuing since Saturday!" Travelling UPVC...

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