Science and Technology

Wayne Cummings has beaten off stiff competition from brothers Wayne Kerr and Yiwen Kerr to slide into interim role as Bellend-in-Chief of the UK's...

Groundbreaking research at Rochdale Technical University’s Institute of Genetic Engineering has confirmed that evolution has stopped working, and in some cases is being reversed,...

People who pay for things using the exact change are "worse than Hitler, Stalin and Piers Morgan combined" according to new research. The study, which...

Twitter was forced to set up thousands of new servers today after an Australian car safety campaign released pictures of Graham. Millions of original witsters...

Scientists working at Rochdale university announced Monday that they have proved the existence of supermassive black hole at the heart of the Conservative Party. "Imagine...

Some of Britain's top scientists have issued a stark warning ahead of the long-awaited rollout of 5G mobile networks across the country. In an exclusive...

The government’s “digital service”, a branch of the cabinet office and the one that was meant to protect the government’s computer systems against cyber...

The next update to Apple's iOS devices will feature almost 100 Islamic emojis, dubbed Islamojis, replacing almost all Christian iconography available on the iPhone...

The Project May-Bot team have announced that due to recent poor performance and unexpected features being noted, they are looking into resetting the May-Bot...

A local nihilist has started a campaign against vaccinations, arguing that they force children to endure the pain and sadness of their futile existence. Stephen...

A Bolton man says he fears that 5 aside football pitch flood light is actually a secret 5G mast that will cause him to...

Our foreign correspondent Miffy Bigboots reports from South London. A man at a loose end over the weekend changed his opinion on virtually everything after...

Oceans across the globe are feeling decidedly odd today after the entire planet's population of porpoises and dolphins completely and utterly disappeared overnight. "I really...

Left wing idiots are are as gullible as right wing idiots scientists at Rochdale Community University Bullshit Studies Department have discovered.

Facebook couldn't be logged into earlier today after millions of people updated their statuses with things like; "The Prosecco is open! You know what that...

It seems that testing conditions, designed to mimic working in an average open plan office space, may have coloured the subjects' results. "It wasn't that their neutral faces were 'bitchy', just that even within a short time of meeting us, they were already just sick of our shit."