Cigar Shaped Asteroid Ouamuamua’s violent past hints he’s from Blackburn
Space - Mere months after it was revealed Om.. Oom.. that cigar shaped asteroid, was believed to have come from a distant solar system,...
Elon Musk to harness teenage angst as source of renewable energy
South African science lunatic & suspected wizard Elon Musk has turned his attentions to what he calls "mankind's greatest untapped resource".
A spokesperson for Mr...
Linkin Park’s poignant question answered
The question posed by Linkin Park all those years ago has been answered and
people might not like the answer.
According to scientists, who have been...
Government to tackle loneliness in the elderly by converting them into WiFi hotspots
The government has announced plans to tackle social isolation in the elderly by converting them into WiFi hotspots.
The Department of Digital, Culture, Media &...
Apple to move to Battersea iStation
Apple have announced this week that they will be basing their future British tax evasion projects at South London's Battersea Power Station.
Mayor Sadiq Khan...
Tests prove evolution has stopped among UKIP supporters
Groundbreaking research at Rochdale Technical University’s Institute of Genetic Engineering has confirmed that evolution has stopped working, and in some cases is being reversed,...
Parents ask kids to surf net to find solution to spending too much time...
Fresh fears regarding the overuse of the internet by youngsters has emerged, with experts suggesting that it should be compared to fast food. The...
Earth isn’t flat, cats would have pushed everything off edge by now if it...
Scientists around the World have finally conceded that the Earth is most probably not a completely flat disc after all.
Research conducted at the University...
Computer driven people are a menace say self-driven cars
Over the last ten years or so, humans have been becoming more and more computer-driven. Cars are speaking out against this worrying trend.
In a...
Earth is Flat Confirms Cretin After Watching YouTube Video
Our foreign correspondent Miffy Bigboots reports from South London.
A man at a loose end over the weekend changed his opinion on virtually everything after...
Being a tosser won’t stop you getting rich, scientist claims
Anders Farkenobbviarrs, head of research at the Norway Institute of Selfish Prick-like Behavior in Trondheim said “Loads of rich, successful people are total fuckers,...
If we can pay for food we can pay for rockets – say NASA
American space go-getters NASA are said to be up in arms about budget restrictions while there is still enough money available to feed some...
Christian groups OUTRAGED as Apple replace Christian emojis with Islamojis
The next update to Apple's iOS devices will feature almost 100 Islamic emojis, dubbed Islamojis, replacing almost all Christian iconography available on the iPhone...
?Kim Jong Un invents universal cure
The secretive state of North Korea has managed to cure most illnesses from the common cold to cancer, it has been revealed.
Ishit Yu Not,...
Stephen Hawking hasn’t got a leg to stand on, says Jeremy Hunt
Health Secretary Jeremy C. Hunt has responded to Hawking's criticism of NHS reforms in a series of tweets, which are pompous even by Hunt's...
Christians, Muslims, Satanists Opposed To Pokemon Go
Following the UK release of Pokemon Go ten days ago, several prominent spokespersons for leading UK religious organisations have spoken out, condemning the game...
