Teresa May to trigger Brexit after finding Shergar
Teresa May has finally announced her cabinet's decisive plan to trigger article 50 reminding Brexit voters that it is still "on her to do...
Brexit voters furious at a British Court today
Brexit voters today were unsure who to be furious at today after a British Court as opposed to a European Court made a decision about the nature of British Parliamentary Sovereignty.
Merkel Pulls Out of EU Security Council Talks as There’s No German Word for...
Angela Merkel broke off talks with the EU's British Security Commissioner this week that were about the worsening crisis affecting the free movement of people.
EU condemns punchy politics
After events today the EU has made an announcement about violent behaviour.
Guy Verhofstadt, famous both for having a mouth like a vending machine and...
Labour urge supporters to vote Conservative to keep Liberal Democrats out of Power
The Labour Party general election campaign is said to be in tatters today following the release of the Liberal Democrat's Manifesto in the last...
‘Shit dont stick to this, fam’ says Boris Johnson
Non-stick coating manufacturer Teflon has today announced a lucrative tie in with Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson.
The company is believed to have lined up an...
Red Weather Warning as Conservative Politicians spotted with hands in own pockets
With temperatures plummeting across the British Isles, many patriotic politicians are complaining at their lack of opportunities to escape the country.
Conservative Politicians Jeremy Hunt,...
Nigel Farage in eleventh hour bid for International Twat of the Year Award
Nigel Farage has made an eleventh hour bid to snatch the "International Twat of the Year Award" from Donald Trump.
We can just eat cats, dogs and harvest organ meat from the poor if...
British farmers would just start rounding up household pets for meat in the event of the UK leaving the EU without a trade deal,...
Gay sex not a sin if you keep your socks on says Tim Farron
Liberal Democrat leader Tim Farron says he does not believe gay sex is a sin "as long as you don't push back".
Mr Farron said...
Boris Johnson bitten by radioactive spider, spider now a complete c*nt
A radioactive spider was rushed to the vets today after biting Boris Johnson and subsequently becoming a massive arsehole.
Apparently after biting Mr Johnson the...
Statistics confirm three kinds of lies; lies, damned lies and Boris Johnson’s statistics
UK Statistics Authority have reaffirmed the old adage today that there are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies and Boris Johnson’s use of...
Trump in Mexican standoff
Donald Trump today paid a flying visit to Mexico for talks with President Pena Nieto.
Amongst his entourage was his new Foreign Policy adviser Jeremy...
Dead gays thrilled at posthumous pardons for jail terms and chemical castrations
Dead gays celebrated accross the country today as the 'Alan Turing Law' was unveiled by government, effectively absolving them of wrong doing for having a...
Jeremy Corbyn to cross floor to lead the Conservative Party
Written off as a hopeless loser, terrorist supporter and left-wing extremist at the start of last week's general election campaign, Jeremy Corbyn has risen...
Theresa May’s plot to run the country foiled by Theresa May
Theresa May will face a cross party parliamentary committee this week, after it was revealed she foiled her own plot to successfully run the...
