Trump claims Blacks, Latinos and Women are rigging the election by voting

0
America braces itself tonight after it was revealed that not just White rednecks are eligible to vote.

What do people need money for? Asks man wearing suit borrowed from tramp

5
A man wearing a suit borrowed from a hobo went on national radio yesterday to suggest people should only be allowed to earn a maximum amount of money.

May rains on International Happiness Day with Brexit announcement

0
March 20th has long been designated International Happiness Day, a day to celebrate all that is good about life in the 21st century. However there...
Shrugging Man

No manifesto better than a bad manifesto say Conservatives

6
Confusion reigns following the Queen's Speech as the Tories deny all knowledge of a manifesto that may, or may not, have existed prior to...
Blue Passport

A blue passport is an integral part of being British, says bloke who’s never...

10
The great victory that is Brexit has delivered old-style blue passport covers to the grateful people. Rejoicing Brits across the country have been applying...

Champion Shadow Cabinet Minister in U-turn U-turn

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MP Sarah Champion, permed badger and former/current shadow Minister of Preventing Abuse and Changing One's Mind, unresigned today in what the Guardian and Owen...
Rees Mogg

Height supremacists promise New World Order will be with us shortly

9
Growing support for alt-height movement Height Supremacists have a new doyen in the shape of Sixtus Rees-Mogg. Rees-Mogg initially attracted support with a very modern...

Extinction Rebellion glue themselves to new Brexit deal

0
In a disastrous move for Boris Johnson, a member of climate protest group Extinction Rebellion have glued themselves to the newly negotiated Brexit deal. White,...

Britons happy counting down the days till they lose freedom of movement

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Everyone in Britain awoke this morning overjoyed to know they are one more day closer to losing their freedom of movement across Europe and...

Britain leaves E.U. in last night’s dress and no tights

3
At 6.30 this morning, Britain hailed a taxi while attempting to wipe off the worst of last night's make-up, confident in the knowledge that...
Jeremy Corbyn

Owen Smith Recognised in Tesco Express

0
In a massive boost for the right of The Labour Party, Owen Smith was spotted and recognised in a Tesco Express in Camden yesterday....
Tory

Tory MP resigns because government is a bit conservative

1
Conservative MP Stephen Phillips, who has represented Sleaford and North Hyekham, in Lincolnshire for 6 years has resigned. The word in Westminster is the barrister...
Paul Nuttall

Paul Nuttall Demands Return To Ice Age

0
Historians specialising in migration to the British Isles have confirmed that Paul Nuttall actually got something technically right after his Women’s Hour interview this...

IT department confirms that turning Maybot off and on again didn’t work

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The latest attempt to reboot the Downing Street operating system failed after the Tory party IT department tried turning Maybot off and on again. Nigel...
Theresa May

Brexiters puzzled to find out what Parliamentary Sovereignty actually means

0
Theresa May has been left with a political bloody nose after she was unable to convince enough of her own party to swallow her...

Ed Millibland’s Tombstone to be Used for Thousands of Homes

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The polls that are currently condemning Jeremy Corbyn to fail once predicted success for the socially inept, humanoid shaped play doh figure, Ed Millibland.  It's...

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