New London Development Announced
With todays news that the Calais Jungle has been cleared of filthy asylum seekers, the ramshackle dwellings have immediately been occupied by an even...
I wish it could be Brexit everyday
When the pounds begins to fall
and economic growth begins to stall
It puts a great big smile on a remainer’s face
If you dive...
Trump joins Time Magazine “Person of the Year” club
In a move in keeping with the utter shit show that has been 2016, Time Magazine has named the orange baboon Donald Trump "Person...
Grenfell Tower survivors offer Michael Gove their last five pounds to bugger off
Survivors of the Grenfell Tower disaster suffered a further shock last night when esteemed Tory minister Michael Gove was spotted in the vicinity.
It's believed...
Asda Self-service checkout till beats Boris Johnson at Scrabble
Scientists from Rochdale College have developed an artificially intelligent self service till that beat Boris Johnson at Scrabble.
Dr Frederick Seddon said, "We were wanting...
Brexit is actually really hard confirm millionaires who stand to inherit everything but brains
The Rochdale Herald has been briefed by a group of hardcore Brexit Conservative MPs who have confirmed that Brexit is actually really hard, even...
Companies forced to list massively racist employees
British companies are to be made to publish lists of how many employees are nasty and racist, under new plans announced by home secretary...
President Trump has hopes dashed each time he hears ‘oui oui’ during French visit
Donald Trump is experiencing an emotional rollercoaster during his ongoing French visit because each time he hears a French woman say ‘oui oui’ he...
Nigel Farage kicked out ‘Rochdale’s most Brexity pub’ for foreign sounding name
The John Bull, formerly The Union, has conciously removed all traces of foreign influence. Gone are the continental café-style pavement tables.
It no longer...
Downing Street denies allegations of incontinence
In an unprecedented announcement, Downing Street issued a denial of any suggestions that the Prime Minister is incontinent.
"During a period of initial uncertainty, many...
Trump and Putin plan the partition of Poland
It’s been revealed that American President Donald Trump and Russian President Vladamir Putin have agreed to partition Poland between their two countries.
Both leaders...
Rochdale entrepreneur fails to set up free trade agreement with Burnley
Rochdale entrepreneur Cliff Edge has been explaining to the Rochdale Herald how he tried to negotiate a free-trade deal with a supermarket in Burnley.
The...
Outrage as Trump BBQ ruins White House lawn
White House officials were said to be furious today after Trump supporters burned a cross on the South Lawn last night.
The BBQ, which was...
Nuttall pulls out of Stoke by-election
NHS hating, pathological liar and leader of UKIP, Paul Nuttall, has today pulled out of the Stoke by-election after it was revealed that his remaining...
Corbyn vows to walk to Brussels to get best Brexit deal
Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn has vowed that if he becomes Prime Minister he will personally walk to Brussels to demonstrate how serious he is...
Trident Subs: Gotta catch ’em all
Speaking at the Nato summit in Warsaw this week, David Cameron has hinted that almost £16bn ear-marked for the renewal of the Trident nuclear...
