Government takes time off from covering up child abuse to tell people what kind...
The UK Government has taken time off from failing the victims of institutional child abuse and covering the tracks of high profile paedophiles to tell people what kind of pornography they're allowed to watch.
Tommy Robinson converts to hipsterism in prison, plans to open falafel stand in Shoreditch
Far-right garden gnome impersonator Tommy Robinson has revealed that he has become a hipster in prison and plans to open an organic falafel stand...
Government reassures that Brexit talk delays are all part of the plan
Number 10 has today reassured the Rochdale Herald that everything is in good order and that they do, in fact, know what they are...
Trump campaign drops email subject as Clinton exonerated
Republicans and other Trump supporters are graciously admitting that perhaps they got a little carried away today after it was revealed that no evidence...
Gove Demands Westminster Soft Play Area
Michael Gove MP caused elation inside Kate Hoey MP today with his demand for a soft play area at the Palace of Westminster.
Gove, the...
Jeremy Corbyn is a bit shit, admits former Momentum leader Robbie Tomlinson
Former Rochdale Momentum leader, Robbie Tomlinson, whose real name is Stuart Taxley-Gibbon, has admitted today that Jeremy Corbyn, leader of the Labour Party, is...
Ringmaster May’s Brexit circus will tour till 2021 unless David Davis gets eaten
It was announced last Friday that Ringmaster may’s Brexit circus will attempt to extend its world record breaking tour of Europe until 2021 unless...
Obama quietly pleased his G20 riots were bigger than Trump’s
President Barack Obama, who was born in America, is said to be privately pleased the riots at G20 summits he attended were bigger than...
Who needs firemen anyway asks DUP clad Tory government
There was anger in parliament last night as the government narrowly defeated a motion by the Labour Party to end the cap on public...
George Osborne seen in Waitrose buying fava beans and a nice Chianti
Following news reports of comments made by Old Screw Eyes, former chancellor of the Exchequer, serial job hoarder and moneybags George Osborne, it appears...
Medical advances mean some students might survive long enough to pay back debts PM...
The woman pretending to be British Prime Minister is expected to increase her appeal to the younger demographics today. She will do it by...
Government expands badger cull to five new areas despite warnings it doesn’t work
We to need press on with the solution, said Theressa May when questioned before all the MP's went on their jollies, leaving the...
Child refugees can stay till after they’ve seen NHS Dentist
Teenage child refugees completing their journey to the UK were breathed a huge sigh of relief after being told they could remain in the UK until they could secure an appointment with an NHS Dentist.
Jeremy Corbyn appoints his teddy bears and security blanket to cabinet
The leader of the Labour Party Jeremy Corbyn has just had to give all his friends in the tree-house gang another reprimand. Having failed...
No Government is Better than a Bad Government, says May
Theresa May made the announcement after exit polls suggest that no single party will be able to form a government. "Let me be very...
Some bloke in UKIP said something about the BBC
Bill Etheridge, a candidate for hard right conservative comedy troupe UKIP has said that the BBC should be privatised because it's "shoving left wing...
