Conservatives to shoot badgers until Henry VIII powers allow them to hunt with dogs...

3
Conservative MP George Eustice was allegedly out celebrating at a champagne breakfast this morning after deciding to kill a lot more badgers in order...

Government approves £118M fire safety upgrade, including sprinklers, for the Houses of Parliament

0
Britain's greatest female Prime Minister, announced in a key note speech, that her Government has learned the lessons of Grenfell.  £118 million has been...

UKIP Apologises For Not Knowing What Obvious Means

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UKIP were forced to admit today that big words like "joke" and "obvious" are generally beyond their grasp. The announcement came after a social media...

Labour MPs win right for toilet break during final vote on Brexit deal

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After a tense round of debating in the house of commons Labour MPs succeeded in forcing through an amendment to the Brexit bill which...
Theresa May

Theresa May sets new record for least informative interview

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Theresa May, the first unelected Prime Minister to have deliberately had her hair cut into the shape of a bell end has given an...

Tests prove evolution has stopped among UKIP supporters

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Groundbreaking research at Rochdale Technical University’s Institute of Genetic Engineering has confirmed that evolution has stopped working, and in some cases is being reversed,...

First man to read entire Maastricht Treaty declares it “A Bugger’s Muddle”

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A British diplomat who began reading the Maastricht Treaty on the 6th February 1992 "just in case" finished the entire manuscript on Sunday Evening.

Sturgeon triggers IndyRef 2 after house lands on sister

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Nicola Sturgeon sensationally called for an independence referendum after a house came seemingly from nowhere and landed on her sister. Speaking through an interpreter she...
Boris Johnson

What’s the fuss, I loved playing sardines with nanny

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Boris Johnson has met Jeremy Corbyn's attack on the Conservative's record on education today with incredulity.

Donald Trump commemorative jigsaws to have missing pieces by design

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The White House has confirmed that the new range of Trump jigsaw puzzles, commemorating the President's achievements in office, are deliberately missing several pieces. The...

Supreme Court rules Theresa May is not allowed to break the law

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In a completely pointless landmark ruling costing millions the Supreme Court has had its final say. Brexit means Brexit, which means both the Houses Parliament...
Westminster

Power hungry arseholes also pervy fuckers shocker

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The United Kingdom is in shock this week after an all-party think tank found that power hungry arseholes of all political persuasions are also...

Brexit Deal Threatens Iconic Rochdale Signpost

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One of Rochdale's most iconic landmarks, the Welcome to Rochdale; Arsehole of Europe' signpost, has come under threat as Britain gears up for leaving...
Farage

Farage and Woolfe hospital hand job scandal

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Farage and Woolfe have been caught on film in anothe compromising position.

Trump says IKEA table he ordered arrived ‘pre-blown up’

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President Donald J Trump is convinced that ‘something bigly bad’ has gone down in Sweden, after a dining table he ordered from IKEA arrived...
Corbyn

Jeremy Corbyn is a bit shit, admits former Momentum leader Robbie Tomlinson

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Former Rochdale Momentum leader, Robbie Tomlinson, whose real name is Stuart Taxley-Gibbon, has admitted today that Jeremy Corbyn, leader of the Labour Party, is...

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