Donald Trump

Donald Trump to let Donald Trump fail now as it will be a lot...

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Donald Trump has decided to extend his executive decision concerning repealing Obamacare to his entire presidency. It is believed the most successful man ever to...

Doing Right Thing Would Set Dangerous Precedent, Says Prime Minister

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Prime Minister Theresa May has announced that she won't intervene in David Cameron's scheme to reward all his mates with Honours. "Listen here," said an...
Houses of Parliament

Sovereignty of Parliament is a bit over-rated, say Brexiters

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Pro-Brexit MP's have been rushing to congratulate Parliament on it's demonstration of democracy and parliamentary sovereignty today. A Government bill for Brexit was narrowly defeated...
Bearded "hipster"

Hipster twats demand clean shaven white twats condemn terror twats

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Nathan Barley led calls today for clean shaven white twats to “take responsibility for their community.” “It is imperative, at this time of national crisis,...

Met Office advise all future storms named Storm Boris until May gets the balls...

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The Met Office has released a statement this lunch time advising that all storms to hit the United Kingdom this winter will be named...

Politician was my second choice, I really wanted to be a maths teacher admits...

Diane Abbott has responded to criticism of her dismal interview performance on LBC yesterday by saying that she never really wanted to be a...

Corbyn Calls for Alton Towers to be Nationalised as Queues for Rollercoaster hits 2...

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Waiting for hours for the hope of a seat, crushed up against other in the park, or crouched uncomfortably in the queues is an...

Tate & Lyle sponsor cabinet meetings

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After what critics are calling a feeble effort to tackle childhood obesity the government is now in hot water again as it transpired that...
Tree lined street

Sheffield Tree-Felling Councillor Hospitalised With Irony Overdose

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It has been revealed that Clr Brian 'Hodge' Podge, the Sheffield Councillor responsible for the hugely unpopular street tree felling programme, was rushed to...
Downing Street

Stubborn turd refuses to flush

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A massive turd that is blocking the downstairs bog next to the Cabinet Meeting Room in Downing Street has been studiously ignoring hints that...

Tim Farron’s Andrew Neil interview cancelled for Bake off

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Tim Farron has been left looking sheepish in his chair after Andrew Neil cancelled the Liberal Democrat leader's interview just moments into the opening statement. Neil interrupted...

Henry Bolton Declares vote of No Confidence in UKIP

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UKIP leader Henry Bolton has declared a unilateral vote of no confidence in UKIP. Bolton has spoken out tonight, claiming that he wants to...
Plate of Mince

Nadine Dorries replaced as MP for Mid Bedfordshire with nice plate of warm mince

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Following her bizarre statement in which she decried the Brexit deal as leaving the U.K. with no MEPs and no representation on the EU...

Lords Punish May With Dance

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Prime Minister Theresa May attempted to intimidate The Lords this evening with a “dance off”. And failed terribly. A furious May entered the Lords...
Noel Edmunds

Noel Edmunds to head up Brexit negotiations armed with 28 red boxes

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Failed entertainer and minister for Brexit, David Davis, will take centre stage in a Deal or No Deal special to be aired on Dave...

Sex worker and fruit picker tops post-Brexit career options

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According to a press release from the Federated Institution of Associated School Careers Officers, the Brexit Plan simplifies future British employment opportunities to sex work...

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