Pound hitting 8 year low nothing to do with Brexit Professor at University of...

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Professor Cliff Edge has been quick out of the blocks today to reassure the public that the pound hitting an eight year low against...
Danczuk

Simon Danczuk wins Prestigious most Tory Tweet Award 2017 Le Chatte d’Or

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Simon Danczuk has won the 2017 most Tory Tweet Award after taking to Twitter to complain about homeless beggars in Rochdale today.

Some bloke in UKIP said something about the BBC

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Bill Etheridge, a candidate for hard right conservative comedy troupe UKIP has said that the BBC should be privatised because it's "shoving left wing...

Brexit transition period ends when the EU says it ends, says Philip Hammond

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The Chancellor Philip Hammond offered much needed clarity on the government's Brexit project today, by confirming it will enter a transition period which will...

Rees-mogg to donate communion wafers to food banks to alleviate hunger with uplifting religious...

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Community pressure group VFAC (Vegan Food Advocates for Catholicism) have reacted with dismay today to news that Jacob Rees-mogg MP has donated one tonne...
Corbyn Pram

Woman alleges Corbyn hasn’t paid her for pram PR stunt yet

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Ms Mia Faberge has alleged Jeremy Corbyn is yet to pay her for the PR stunt wherein she lent him her sister’s baby in...
Collection of London souvenirs

POTUS to “bring back some Brexit” as a souvenir from UK visit

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It has recently been announced that Donald Trump, the 45th President of the United States (POTUS) is to pay a state visit... Some chap who won...
Angela Merkel

Merkel Pulls Out of EU Security Council Talks as There’s No German Word for...

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Angela Merkel broke off talks with the EU's British Security Commissioner this week that were about the worsening crisis affecting the free movement of people.
Hide an Seek

Theresa May wins coveted Parliamentary Cross Party Hide and Seek Trophy

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Prime minister Theresa May has won the 2017 Parliamentary Cross Party Hide and Seek Trophy ahead of stiff competition. "It was an incredible effort from...
iPhone

Losers celebrate election victory

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The winners of the 2017 election are despondent today as they downheartedly celebrate their victory. “Yay. Fandabby bloody dozey,” said Conservative Unionist National Tory Society...

Dead refugees welcome say Home Office

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Refugees will be welcome to Great Britain providing they are dead, under a new scheme announced by the Home Office. The new measures, expected to...
Refugees Welcome

Fury as UK migration laws mean that London will be SWAMPED with Brummies by...

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Birmingham is a modern, cosmopolitan city whose motto, Forward, sums it up perfectly. The smug, self-serving shithole that is London is the reverse. With...

New Far Right Perfume Released.

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In order to capitalise on the mood of the country at the moment, the ex-UKIP leader Nigel Farage is to release a new perfume...

Doctors find hating immigrants can increase risk of getting Nuttalls

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Recent medical studies have found a direct link between xenophobic thoughts and the rampant outbreak of Nuttalls in the U.K. Closely resembling a haemorrhoid, a...
Confusion

Labour less popular than Conservatives snap poll reveals

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Labour voters up and down the country were dismayed to learn that, according to a poll of absolutely everybody with a vote in the...

Sun exposes Cable as Strawberry fool

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Liberal democrat leadership candidate "SIR" Vince Cable has been left looking a plum strawberry fool after his claim that Britain was running out of...

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