Whatever gave you the impression I will deal with student debt asks man who...
A man who distinctly said that he’d “deal with” student debt during an interview with the NME is curious to know why everybody was...
Jeremy Corbyn found alive and well and working in B&Q
Jeremy Corbyn has been found alive and well and working in a branch of B&Q. The DIY store is well known for its positive...
Theresa May to meet voters to tell them to fuck off in person
The results are in and Theresa May is to remain Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, sort of, probably for a bit at least...
Trump orders Fabergé selfie-stick for inauguration
In preparation for his inauguration ceremony, President elect Trump has commissioned Fabergé, the esteemed and historic jewellery makers to the Russian emperors, to craft...
Michael Gove is somebody’s favourite for something
Michael Gove's mum has spoken of her delight this morning after her son was described as somebody's favourite, including her's, for the first time...
Theresa May rehearsing upcoming Brexit u-turn while on hill walking holiday
"It will be my most challenging about face yet." The Prime Minister is reported to have informed her cabinet as they prepared to disband...
Boris Johnson feared dead?
Rumours are rife today that the comical floppy haired Brexit buffoon Boris Johnson may have popped his clogs. It's been weeks now since he has...
Trump claims Blacks, Latinos and Women are rigging the election by voting
America braces itself tonight after it was revealed that not just White rednecks are eligible to vote.
Nicola Sturgeon confirms she is yet to read her job description
Nicola Sturgeon made a surprising admission late this afternoon, when she revealed she is yet to read her job description as Scottish First Minister.
"Don't...
IT department confirms that turning Maybot off and on again didn’t work
The latest attempt to reboot the Downing Street operating system failed after the Tory party IT department tried turning Maybot off and on again.
Nigel...
Corbyn sacks last of Shadow Cabinet who didn’t resign last year
In a shock move Friday Labour Leader Jeremy Corbyn sacked all of his shadow ministers who didn't resign last year in protest at his...
May May trigger Brexit in May? Maybe
Theresa May today revealed her plans and a slogan for Brexit; a bitter, lonely and incontinent future with seventeen cats and no continent.
The slogan...
Britain to hold referendum to decide whether we love or hate Marmite
Referendum fan Nicola Sturgeon has announced plans for a controversial referendum to decide once and for all if Britain loves or hates Marmite.
Donald Trump to let Donald Trump fail now as it will be a lot...
Donald Trump has decided to extend his executive decision concerning repealing Obamacare to his entire presidency.
It is believed the most successful man ever to...
Britain happy to be America’s toilet after Brexit and doesn’t fear a blockage
Dr Liam Fox is in America this week offering the United Kingdom up as America’s toilet, after Brexit, and sees no risk of a...
The name Amber is quite Indian – Say Newly Appointed Head of UK KGB
The Home Secretary was tonight believed to be on the run from her own creation, the Keepers of Great Britain.
