Trump finds Rory McIlroy’s head in bed after throwing Koch off Golf Course

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President-Elect Donald Trump has denied evicting the proper billionaire, libertarian gun nut and political financier behind the Tea Party, David Koch, from his exclusive...

Blairite Entryism Not A Big Deal, Insist Blairites

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It was revealed today that a Blairite peer, a hedge fund manager, several rich business types and a Liberal Democrat Lord were behind the...

May to leave dinner middle of main course and refuse to say what she’ll...

36
Downing Street has rushed to reassure an anxious British public today that the prime minister will leave her dinner with EU counterparts this evening...
Theresa May

Get behind my shit deal or we won’t be able to do dreadful thing,...

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Theresa May has urged MP's to get behind her awful Brexit plan or risk not being able to have Brexit. With many people warning that...

Public unsure what to believe after Nuttall admits ‘Everything I say is a lie’

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In another reputation-busting move, Paul Nuttall has stumped logicians and shocked the wider world with the classic Liar's or Epimenides Paradox by saying; "Everything I...

May rains on International Happiness Day with Brexit announcement

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March 20th has long been designated International Happiness Day, a day to celebrate all that is good about life in the 21st century. However there...
Quantum Leap

Dr Samuel Beckett stuck in 2016 after failing to ‘put right what once went...

15
In the mid 1990's Physicist Dr Samuel Beckett blazed a trail by stepping into his Quantum Leap accelerator and vanishing. In actual fact he woke to...

Citizen’s arrest powers updated to include summary execution

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Put your hands on the car and get ready to die. Home Secretary Amber Rudd confirmed today that the Police and Criminal Evidence Act (PACE)...

Every Brit to get UKIP voting Mother In Law before Brexit

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In a move designed to strengthen the government's hand before Brexit negotiations begin in earnest, every British family is to be assigned a UKIP...
Donald Trump

Donald Trump to let Donald Trump fail now as it will be a lot...

0
Donald Trump has decided to extend his executive decision concerning repealing Obamacare to his entire presidency. It is believed the most successful man ever to...

UK threaten Russia with voting Nul Points at Eurovision

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In the wake of the alleged poisoning of Sergei Skripal and his daughter in Wiltshire last week, the UK has stepped up pressure on...

Hammond to tour UK comedy circuit with budget routine

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After recently testing his new material in Parliament, Chancellor Philip Hammond has decided to take his own brand of political comedy "on the road." His...
Bearded "hipster"

Hipster twats demand clean shaven white twats condemn terror twats

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Nathan Barley led calls today for clean shaven white twats to “take responsibility for their community.” “It is imperative, at this time of national crisis,...

Politician was my second choice, I really wanted to be a maths teacher admits...

Diane Abbott has responded to criticism of her dismal interview performance on LBC yesterday by saying that she never really wanted to be a...

UK in shock as Boris Johnson steps down

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The people of the United Kingdom took a collective gasp today, Wednesday 1st of April, as Boris Johnson announced he would be stepping down. "This...
Corbyn

Corbyn defection massive blow to crybaby lefties

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Shock news reaching us today of defection of the Labour leader and terrorist sympathiser Jeremy Corbyn has left the party in favour of Britain First. The shock...

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