Shops Brace Themselves for Annual 24th December Man Shop of Well Packaged Shite
Man Shop's Eve - the day men buy all their Christmas presents using no thought or imagination based only upon the quality of packaging...
Twitter Breaks Under Strain of Highly Original Wit
Twitter was forced to set up thousands of new servers today after an Australian car safety campaign released pictures of Graham.
Millions of original witsters...
Foreign Office warns tourists not to travel to Iran while Boris Johnson is foreign...
In a move that has rocked the travel industry, British holidaymakers have been banned from travelling to any destination that Boris Johnson has already...
Naked gym guy insists “I’m just high on life”
Reports are circulating that a middle aged man stripped stark bollock naked last night at local budget gym, LoveMuscle.
Eyewitnesses claim he was beating his...
Have Rochdale Tesco Implemented a New Stop And Search Policy?
Following a recent spate of shoplifting, Rochdale's Littleborough branch of Tesco Express came under fire today for apparently launching a dramatic new zero-tolerance 'stop...
Home Office confirms that new blue UK passports will be HALAL-CERTIFIED
The Home Office has confirmed that the United Kingdom's post-Brexit passport covers will be halal-certified.
The iconic Royal blue cover, which is due to be...
?Miranda Hart falls over for the last time
During a performance in Derbyshire last night Miranda Hart fell over and no one laughed.
"It just wasn't funny" said super fan Ewan King who...
Brexit talks in crisis after Michel Barnier unfriends David Davis on Facebook
The UK's negotiations with the EU hit a stumbling block today, after it emerged that Michel Barnier has unfriended David Davis on Facebook.
Brexit secretary...
Nuttall Claims Best Actor At Oscars
Armenian born British Actor Constantine Felangi, better known by his stage name of Paul Nuttall, seized the coveted golden statue for Best Actor at...
Prime Minister not taking donations from millionaires for granted
The Tory spin doctors are especially busy this morning on the nation's airwaves ensuring everybody they are not taking yesterday's electoral results as a...
Britain First release ‘terrorist-proof’ onesie
Britain First have revealed what they claim to be the first ever 'terrorist-proof' clothing - a onesie made entirely from bacon.
Called the 'baconsie', the...
Scientists confirm tea tastes better when somebody else makes it
Researchers from Rochdale Community University have confirmed after years of extensive research that tea tastes loads better when somebody else has made it.
Maurice Tips,...
What time is it Mr Woolfe?
Steven Woolfe, a total barrister who serves as a legal adviser to hedge fund managers and bankers narrowly missed his chance to become replacement...
“Operation Cumshot” – UK gov commits to spunking £100bn on wizard wheeze
The UK government has announce a new initiative to spend £100bn on a COVID-19 testing programme, the Rochdale Herald has learned.
The initiative, the budget...
World in shock as man with history of taking steroids runs faster than bloke...
The World is in shock today after a bloke who has a well documented history of taking performance enhancing drugs ran a bit faster than a bloke who doesn't.
Lib Dems form armed wing in desperate bid to remain relevant
The Liberal Democrats have announced the creation of an ‘armed wing’ in what commentators are interpreting as a last ditch attempt to have some...
