George Osborne confirmed as 13th Doctor Who
Versatile former Chancellor to play austere Time Lord. George Osborne, the former Chancellor turned newspaper editor and investment management firm lobbyist, has been announced today...
Gallagher in filthy pool party outrage
Our colleagues at the Swindon Advertiser have told us that bacteria in the water has resulted in the Oasis pool being shut for the...
Miraculous Jesus face found on Twinkie atop words “sort your fucking gun laws out”
A Mr Billy-Bob Jnr III of Kentucky has made the US news with his Jackpot discovery in an all American snack pack. After a...
Happy Christmas to our Sovereign Parliament and readers
On behalf of the Daily Mail, we would like to wish all our readers a very Happy Christmas. Or if they don't celebrate Christmas,...
Total Coincidence that Virgin hospital take over and massive NHS cuts announced while parliament...
The Conservative Party today claimed once again that the NHS is "safe" in their hands, and denied that huge cuts to NHS services will...
Brexit is actually really hard confirm millionaires who stand to inherit everything but brains
The Rochdale Herald has been briefed by a group of hardcore Brexit Conservative MPs who have confirmed that Brexit is actually really hard, even...
Britain begins cheap cocaine and animal abuse phase of lockdown easing
The Government has announced that horse racing can begin again from today.
A spokesman said, "From today people will be able to gather in groups...
Corbyn supports hunting with dogs repeal in Government manifesto
Jeremy Corbyn has pledged to support the Conservative Party's promise to repeal the fox hunting ban.
This appears to be the result of him mishearing...
Russians Accuse Corbyn of ‘Cultural Appropriation’
British Russians have reacted angrily to the Labour's Election Manifesto announced by Jeremy Corbyn and accused him of "offending or even humiliating an entire...
NHS to be shut down so sick people can get used to feeling poorly
In a shock move Sunday UK chancellor Philip Hammond, announced that his first budget on Wednesday will outline plans for a complete end to...
Revealed! What ‘Brexit’ means.
After months of denying that 'Brexit' could be defined in terms of anything other than being 'Brexit', the Government has finally announced what, in...
Bernie’s Brave Brazillian Blag Backfires
Bernie Ecclestone's brave gamble with Brazilian kidnappers backfired spectacularly last night when his Mother-in-Law was released fit and well from her 9 day captivity.
Formula...
Police concern as Derbyshire sees record levels of panic hiking
Police have appealed to members of the public to exert self restraint as hordes of bored walkers descended on Britain's highways and byways and...
People who say Nazis were socialists to lose human status
The UN has today confirmed that anyone who says Nazis were socialist are to lose human status, joining holocaust deniers in the shortlist of...
EU to offer May reproduction of Munch’s The Scream to hang in 10 Downing...
The woman who believes she is British Prime Minister is to travel to Florence tomorrow to give a one date stand up performance in...
Farron Accepts Offer of Education Secretary As May Offers Anti-Brexit Coaltion
Tim Farron spoke of his relief this evening as he accepted Theresa May's offer of a coalition government on the condition of an anti-Brexit...
