Britain First’s Paul Golding to release prison memoir ‘My Struggul’

1
In tribute to the rabidly anti-Jewish fascist Adolf Hitler, the rabidly anti-Muslim fascist Paul Golding, former leader of Britain First, is doing a sponsored...
Businessman

We’re not doing anything dodgy with your data, says company renowned for doing dodgy...

0
A multi-million organisation has insisted that there's nothing suspicious at all about the new data policy updates, despite them being completely and utterly suspicious. 'The...
Karen Danczuk Topless

Herald Reporter in KAREN DANCZUK TOPLESS Clickbait Scandal

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Following the implementation of new software allowing users to see just what exactly brings visitors to their website based on Googled search terms, a local...
Theresa May

Theresa May shocked and disappointed by contents of freshly installed parliamentary suggestion box

5
Theresa May is said to be both shocked and disappointed this afternoon by the contents of the freshly installed parliamentary suggestion box. The box, made...

New Doctor Who already hates Jeremy Hunt

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The new Doctor hasn't even reanimated yet and already she has fallen out with Jeremy Hunt. The Doctor told the Herald, "Jeremy asked to see...
Nuttall

UKIP Conspiracy theorists claim Paul Nuttall is being erased from history

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UKIP leader, Paul Nuttall PhD, is concerned that he is being erased from history by a shadowy group of leftist and liberal media conspirators.  He recently had to...
Boris Johnson

Ed Millibland defeated again at PMQ’s

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Leader of the Opposition, Boris Johnson, once again tore into Mr. Millibland's 'weak' and 'out of touch' Government. Since successfully leading the remain campaign in...

Smart Energy may help me keep job – says National Grid boss

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The new head of the National Grid, Nicola Shaw,  has today encouraged consumers to opt for "smart energy" devices which will enable her to...
Pot to piss in

Conservatives pledge ‘free pots’ for poor to piss in

15
In the latest Tory manifesto promise benefit claimants and people earning less than minimum wage are to be sent a free chamber pot. Current Work and...

Farage either ‘Innumerate’ or ‘Hypocritical Dickwad’ says Brian Cox

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Nigel Farage is either blind to numbers or being a massive hypocrite, according to Professor Brian Cox, the eminent almost-Rochdale scientist.  "Farage has spent months...

Ed Millibland’s Tombstone to be Used for Thousands of Homes

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The polls that are currently condemning Jeremy Corbyn to fail once predicted success for the socially inept, humanoid shaped play doh figure, Ed Millibland.  It's...

Champion Shadow Cabinet Minister in U-turn U-turn

MP Sarah Champion, permed badger and former/current shadow Minister of Preventing Abuse and Changing One's Mind, unresigned today in what the Guardian and Owen...
Wayne Rooney

Touching scenes as Rooney reunited with hair transplant donor

1
Footage has been revealed of the touching scenes when Wayne Rooney was reunited with his hair donor. The meeting took place on the rock of...

Egyptian Zoo claim donkey identifies as zebra.

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Representatives from a zoo in Cairo have come forward to say that claims that they dressed a donkey up as a zebra are unfounded...

Daily Mail editor bites head off puppy for a dare

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Dog lovers and animal rights activists around the country are said to be outraged and disgusted after the editor of The Daily Mail reportedly...

One in four NHS hospitals have turned to STRIPPING to make ends meet

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Almost a quarter of the nation's hospitals have turned to stripping to make up for funding shortfalls, according to a new report. Commissioned by a...

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