Millenials believe Stalin killed more people than Blair
A recent survey of little shits proved that they know absolutely nothing about history, even though you can't prize Google from their tiny ungrateful...
EU to offer May reproduction of Munch’s The Scream to hang in 10 Downing...
The woman who believes she is British Prime Minister is to travel to Florence tomorrow to give a one date stand up performance in...
Facebook adds ‘I am drunk button’
Facebook has added an "I am drunk" button to the award winning range of useful buttons on your profile page.
The button will immediately quarantine...
Mexican pole vaulter gold medal prospect training at the Trump Wall
Mexico - The Mexican Olympic Games committee have revealed that their biggest prospect of a gold medal in two years time at the 2020...
Team GB get the Trotts
Charlotte Dujardin became the second woman to win three Olympic gold medals today when she came first in the "Horse Dancing" contest this afternoon....
Brexit Halloween Threat
Preparations for the commercialisation of an ancient pagan tradition were thrown into disarray today when importers of Halloween costumes reported that due to poor...
May Day, May Day, we’re going down, Conservatives nose dive in the polls.
The conservative party proverbial plane has today fallen into a nose drive, falling by 10points in the polls over the weekend.
The party's 3 top press...
What’s the fuss, I loved playing sardines with nanny
Boris Johnson has met Jeremy Corbyn's attack on the Conservative's record on education today with incredulity.
The Verve say lack of racism due to drugs not working
Indie stalwarts, The Verve have revealed that the in inspiration for their hit song, The Drugs Don't Work, was their inability to be racist.
The...
Conor McGregor refuses to quit, offers Stephen Hawking a game of ‘da physics’
In a ground-breaking move, career punchist and all round feckin' lad Conor McGregor has revealed his plans to offer professor Stephen Hawking a game...
Google crashes as 17.4m people Google Parliamentary Democracy
Internet search engine Google has been brought to a standstill as a reported 17.4m people searched for the phrase "Parliamentary Democracy" this morning.
The Daily...
Fatboy Kim to re-release his mix of Radioactivity
In a move to hail his comeback, the king of hereditary Marxist dictators, Kim Young Un aka Fatboy Kim, has announced a rehashing of...
Tories to abolish hospital parking charges by abolishing hospitals
The Tory Party has today promised to abolish hospital parking charges by abolishing hospitals.
Tory manifesto spokesman, Bill Board told us, "We've done our research...
Theresa May won’t let Brit Gas 12.5% price hike ruin her hiking holiday
What could be scarier than millions of ageing Brexit backers being hit with a massive energy bill increase right when May's taking enough heat trying to turn her policy fantasies into reality? And especially when she's previously mentioned an energy price cap but now doesn't really want to talk about it again in case she has to do something.
4,000 job cuts at HSBC after Columbian drug cartels move accounts to Barclays
HSBC has told investors today that around 2% of the company's workforce will be made redundant with the focus on anybody who hasn't got...
Russian Government Denies Hacking Rochdale Herald
The Russian Government has reacted angrily towards allegations that it was responsible for hacking UK news site The Rochdale Herald. The Herald, which is...
