Jack Whitehall

Jack Whitehall cast in lead role in Idris Elba biopic

Over the weekend the actor and "comedian" Jack Whitehall took to social media to address rumours that he might play Idris Elba in the upcoming Idris Elba biopic. On Sunday morning, Whitehall posted a series...

UK in shock as Boris Johnson steps down

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The people of the United Kingdom took a collective gasp today, Wednesday 1st of April, as Boris Johnson announced he would be stepping down. "This morning," the Prime Minister announced from self isolation inside number...
KFC

Kentucky Fried Chicken unaffected by chicken shortage, thousands of cats reported missing

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KFC has opened more of its outlets in the UK despite running completely out of chicken.

Alleged assassin Alexander Petrov’s walking gear recommendations

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In an exclusive for The Rochdale Herald, alleged Russian agent and leading fitness industry consultant Alexander Petrov gives Herald readers his recommendations for walking gear. If you're planning to walk in the country or just...
Tim Farron

Party that said it would only form coalition with Tories confused why people think...

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That bloke in charge of the Liberal Democrats and Vince Cable are confused today as people keep calling them Tory lite. “We’re totally against Brexit,” explained Cable, “SO how can we be anything like the...

If one more person says Merry Birthday to me I’m going to lose my...

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Everyone knows someone with a birthday around Christmas day. Those whose birthday falls on the big day itself are the worst off but spare a thought for the big man. How tedious must it be...

Terrorists rejoice at lower energy bills as Jihadis unplug TVs

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Terrorists worldwide are saving money on their energy bills as millions of Jihadis unplug their Samsung smart TVs from mains sockets. The move comes after revelations that the CIA and GCHQ have hacked into the...

Nick Clegg and the Rise of the Alt-Righteous

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The Alt-Righteous, or Always Terribly Self-Righteous, are a loose group of people claiming uber-liberal ideologies but with somewhat different behaviours. They vehemently reject mainstream opinions that differ from their own and dismiss the "non-Righteous" as...

Greggs is not for us; says Jersey

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Pasty super chain and northern nutrition giant Greggs is to close its doors in the tax haven of Jersey after just 18 months of trading.  Despite opening a number of stores in 2015 across the...

Phillip Green to give his entire worldly goods to charity and live naked in...

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Former British Home Stores (BHS) owner Sir Philip Green has announced that he will give his entire worldly goods to charity and that he plans to live "au naturel" in a small copse of...

Daily Mail readers push uphill for Gardner

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Daily Mail readers have insisted that Dressage individual gold medalist Charlotte Dujardin is renamed Charlie Gardner as her name has been deemed "too French" for a post Brexit team GB. Echoing the move which has...

Boris Johnson books flight home from New York with Thomas Cook

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Downing Street have issued a statement this morning explaining that Boris Johnson won't be able to attend Prime Minister's Questions today because he's stuck in New York. Mr Johnson and his entourage are currently queuing...

?Miranda Hart falls over for the last time

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During a performance in Derbyshire last night Miranda Hart fell over and no one laughed. "It just wasn't funny" said super fan Ewan King who attended the show. "Usually when she falls over I'm in...
Angry People

Rochdale Herald distances itself from Rochdale Herald Online question whether Daily Mail Editor Paul...

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We are aware this may make us appear terribly foolish. The Rochdale Herald Editor, the late Quentin D Fortesqueue, is seething about the lack of comprehension amongst the respective readerships of the difference between the...

Local party member unsure whether Tory website hacked or just total bullsh*t

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Following Friday's 'sustained and aggressive' cyber attack on Westminster, speculation mounts as to whether the official Conservative party website has been hacked and vandalised or is in fact just a huge pile of bolloc*s.  Local...
Trump

Donald Trump fails to mention the length of his penis in speech defending western...

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Donald Trump left an eager crowd shocked in Poland today when he failed to mention the length of his schlong once during a rousing speech. The crowd, some bussed in by the ruling party from...

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