London Motorists furious that cyclists lives might be saved
London drivers are currently outraged at London mayor Sadiq Khan's plans to reduce cyclists deaths.
"Over half of cyclist deaths in the capital involve construction...
Study finds Manchester United fans have smallest penises
A new survey of football fans has discovered that Manchester United fans have significantly smaller penises than men who follow other teams.
"It's not just...
It’s the will of the people – Jaguar Land Rover tells redundant employees
Jaguar Land Rover has told employees that by making them redundant they are carrying out the will of the British people.
Employee Bill Board told...
Donald Trump fails to mention the length of his penis in speech defending western...
Donald Trump left an eager crowd shocked in Poland today when he failed to mention the length of his schlong once during a rousing...
Bad dishwasher etiquette is evidence of evolution running backwards
Anthropologists working at the University of Bath today released a study which they claim demonstrates that the human race appears to be separating into...
Soon to be estranged husband proposes ‘transitional sexual union’
Under the suggested terms of the deal, Britton, 34, would remain in the family home for up to a further two years, and would be entitled to avail himself of all the sexual benefits associated with a normal marriage.
Man from Del Monte faces deportation
Amber Rudd has confirmed that the Man from Del Monte is to be deported.
The man who arrived in the UK in the 1980's recently...
Chris Grayling wins Turner Prize for dystopian work “Railway Timetable in May”
The Turner Prize committee has announced that this year's prize will be awarded to Chris Grayling for his dystopian work, "Railway Timetable in May".
A...
Corbyn confirmed as ‘not Messiah, but a very naughty boy’
In a shock revelation today, it has been confirmed that the Labour leader and General Election candidate Jeremy Corbyn is not in fact the...
People who say Nazis were socialists to lose human status
The UN has today confirmed that anyone who says Nazis were socialist are to lose human status, joining holocaust deniers in the shortlist of...
Breadxit: The Great British Taken Off
Love productions, the company behind mindless dirge The Great British Bake Off, has said its show will no longer appear on the BBC after...
Theresa May sets new record for least informative interview
Theresa May, the first unelected Prime Minister to have deliberately had her hair cut into the shape of a bell end has given an...
Not all men, say men
Men would like you to know that the thing a man just did, just isn't something they would do
Following a recent incident where a...
CABINET RESHUFFLE – Boris Johnson becomes Health Secretary
Theresa May's eagerly anticipated cabinet reshuffle has begun.
In what some would describe as "a bit of a surprise", the former Mayor of London and...
Writers of Brexit admit they’ve no idea how to end it and it’s going...
The writers behind the hit show, Brexit say they've no idea how to end the show and there are fears it could turn into...
Bank Holiday Not Fucking Long Enough Decide People
Bank Holidays are not long enough according to a multi-pound survey commissioned by The Rochdale Herald.
"It's 2016 for Christ's sake! Normal weekends should be...
