Quentin Letts launches #StopFundingReasonableness campaign
Quentin Letts, which is a name you may have heard, without actually knowing what it is, is apparently a man, and not an upper...
‘Just a phase’ movement finally represented at London Gay Pride
In another great victory for liberal tolerance, the much maligned "just a phase" movement will be properly recognised at tomorrow's London Pride.
In between...
Homeworkers mysteriously suntanned
People who work from home are all looking oddly suntanned for people who work at their desks for eight hours a day, leading experts...
Royal Mail agrees to launch new £6 first class Brexit stamp
The Royal Mail have announced a special stamp to commemorate Brexit today. The stamp will be a first class stamp and cost £6.
The Daily...
Edinburgh caught in grip of Calamine lotion shortage as midge season starts
Insect repellent sold out today as the temperature north of the border rose above zero, Spring sprang and Edinburgh played host to the annual...
Theresa May Fumbles For Pin For Grenade She Shoved Up Her Ass
Theresa May is reported to be surrounded by a Bomb Disposal Unit this evening after the discovery of an unexploded grenade inside her ass.
The...
Dog looking forward to “cower under the toilet night” this weekend
A dog has told of his love of the 5th of November festivities, or "cower under the toilet night" as it's known in the...
Rochdale family whose Ryanair flight has been cancelled yet to notice difference in service
A Rochdale family who were due to fly with Ryanair to Alicante this week have had their flight cancelled. The family have told the Herald...
Donald Trump declares Buckingham Palace ‘shit hole’ and offers to pay for repairs.
After a petition to stop the orange Hitler visiting the Queen passed 1.7 million signatures, the tyrannical dictator offered to meet the new President...
“If it wasn’t for Churchill you’d be speaking German” says man performing nazi salute...
A man has told the Rochdale Herald that he's protecting the statue of Winston Churchill in Whitehall because, "You'd be speaking German if it...
Vegans & Fruitarians to settle differences with pissing contest in Co-op car park
Long held tensions between Orthodox Vegans & followers of it's subsidiary Fruitarianism about which is the most ethical way of life finally came to...
Eric Bristow MBE says beaten women aren’t ‘proper men’
The pie faced gravy rhyming bastard, who obtained Royal recognition for being good at throwing things made the comment after a series of ill...
Builder finishes job on time and under budget
A small building firm in Lancashire has become the first builder in the history of the industry to finish a job on time and...
Change of fart for Donald
Leading language experts are calling for a change in the classification of the word 'trump'.
Traditionally, it has been used as:
a term for flatulence
...
Man who murdered colleague who spoke to him before first cup of coffee cleared...
A man who beat a colleague to death with a computer keyboard in what has been described as a frenzied attack has been cleared...
United Kingdom gobsmacked as child turns four
It was announced yesterday, with the publication of an official photograph, that a child is turning four today.
We spoke to anthropologist, Dr Kay Smallbones...
