Retailers unconcerned by “Buy Nothing Day”
UK retailers were left smirking knowingly today as momentum gathered for the Buy Nothing Day campaign, being run on the same day as Black...
Every doorway to get free homeless person, pledge Conservatives
The Tory Party has pledged that every doorway in Britain will get a free homeless person by 2021.
A spokesman told us, "The Tory Party...
BBC bans presenters saying “Happy Holidays” because it offends Christians
The BBC has banned presenters from using the term, "Happy Holidays" as it offends Christians.
Rochdale resident Stan Still told us, "This is PC rubbish...
Theresa May to change name to Votey McVoteface to secure youth vote
Prime Minister Theresa May will change her name to Votey McVoteface ahead of this Thursday's general election.
With the election a matter of hours away...
Dominic Cummings appears on TV to tell plebs to f*** off in person
Dominic Cummings has appeared on the BBC to tell everyone to f*** off and leave him alone.
Speaking to Secretary of the Boris Booster Club,...
Children of hippy parents gear up for annual disappointment of ethical advent calendars
The children of hippies have been telling the Herald about how they've been preparing for receiving disappointing advent calendars.
8 year old Freedom Snowphish said,...
Extreme weather leaves KFC with too much chicken
As 'The Beast From The East' takes a firm hold across the UK, KFC have announced that it is overrun with chicken as no...
Nigel Farage reveals he was thrown out of the SAS for being too good
Nigel Farage MP (just kidding) has revealed that he was thrown out of the SAS for being too good.
Mr Farage MP (just kidding) was...
Working class couple getting married
A working class couple, Steven Dickinson and Barbara Stevenson, who don't own a string of polo ponies, are due to get married at a...
Further scandal as so called satirical page Southend News Network owners aren’t even Southern!
In what is turning out to be a much dragged out saga of scandal after scandal from those jumped up meme thieves over at...
Chilcot stuns world with news that Pope is catholic
Sir John Chilcot has stunned the world by stating again that the Pope is catholic and so it seems is Britain's greatest wartime leader...
Wonga to rebrand as Universal Credit Day Loans
The Autumn Budget 2017 announced changes to Universal Credit, merging the government's flagship benefits payment scheme with short-term high-cost credit provider Wonga.
Mr B.Starde a...
Annual day of disappointment for fathers receiving crap presents
It's Father's Day and an annual day of depression for men across the nation as fathers are expected to sit, smile and feign appreciation...
That’ll Show Them…
Racists reacted with predictable denial today when faced with the reality that the punishments they frequently recommend for those seeking asylum, immigrants and generally...
Britain First’s Paul Golding and the EDL’s Ian Crossland announce engagement
Shock today as Britain First leader Paul Golding announced he is to marry EDL chief, Ian Crossland.
Although the pair often claim to support gay...
Prince Harry ruled unfit for work by ATOS
Prince Harry has been ruled unfit for work by ATOS after attending a work capability assessment.
"The Prince was sanctioned last month after he missed...
