Super hunter chilli Yorkie ice cream man-bar ultra plus released for aggressive thrusting straight...
In a bid to expand on the non-gay male ice cream market, a new extreme sports cryogenic experience for man men is being launched.
It...
Muslim women swap burkas for Stig costumes to appeal to middle aged white men
A new experimental initiative has seen numerous British Muslim women swap their traditional full face veils for an outfit made popular by Top Gear's...
Britain signs lucrative post Brexit tax avoidance deal with Lichtenstein
Dominic Raab has announced that Britain is set to sign a very lucrative tax avoidance deal with Lichtenstein.
A Government spokesman said, "This is a...
Nation Ecstatic As Dapper Laughs Finally Disappears Up Own Arse
Finally some good news! The nation was overcome with emotion today as positive confirmation came through that sexual assault based 'comedian' and professional pick...
Paul Golding Christmas Carol
Jingle Bells
My cell smells
It's gloomy and its rank
I only pissed some Muslims off
Now I'm sitting in the tank. Hey
Jingle Bells
This is hell
I don't think...
Arsonists shocked building they set on fire is burning
A group of arsonists have spoken of their shock at discovering that a building they've spent a decade carefully trying to set fire to...
Prince Harry arrested in Windsor for aggressive begging to pay for wedding
Windsor-- Following complaints of aggressive begging on the streets of Windsor today Prince Harry was among the vagrants swept up in a Thames Police...
Little Chef Change All Breakfasts To ‘Pork-Free’ After Complaints by ‘Foreigners’.
British roadside dining legends Little Chef have decided to make all their breakfasts, including their famous ‘All Day Breakfast’, entirely pork-free following a campaign...
Follow Burnley’s example and shower less often, water companies urge Britain
The recent heatwave shows no sign of abating with another four weeks of sunshine forecast by the Met Office.
A hosepipe ban has been enacted...
Brexit decided by a swift round of ‘Bullseye’
It was revealed today that the Brexit deal was decided by the British government and the EC leaders taking part in an episode of...
Nuclear holocaust averted as Southern Rail selected to deliver US missile attack
A spokesman for Southern Rail confirmed to the Rochdale Herald that in view of the anticipated two day delay the four minute warning given in advance of nuclear attacks would consequently be extended to 2,880 minutes.
Nuttall lost close personal election in Stoke
Tragedy stricken leader of UKIP, Paul Nuttall (105), faced fresh disaster yesterday when he lost a close personal election in Stoke.
"Everything was looking good,...
Lemming suicide myth rebunked
For many years the myth persisted that Lemmus lemmus, known to you and I as the lemming, would inexplicably hurl itself into the abyss...
FA cup cancelled due to Royal Wedding scheduling clash
The Rochdale Herald has learned that the Football Association have taken the unprecedented step of cancelling the 2018 FA Cup final.
The move comes after...
I wouldn’t rape a fat woman, I have standards – says Trump
Thousands of Republican voters suffered serious head injuries yesterday after face palming themselves really hard during a Trump Rally.
Warning issued after teetotal vegan non-smoker bores himself to death
Fresh concerns have been raised over the safety of healthy lifestyles after a study found that people following them invariably die eventually anyway.
A team...
