Justice

Britain plans Brexit trade deal ‘perverts for peace’

Following the embarrassment of the spectacular failure of a hideously expensive program to rehabilitate sex offenders, Ministry of Justice officials are arranging study visits...

US Closes Wardrobe Border Travel Bans on Narnians and Radical Followers of Aslan

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President Donald Trump last night signed an Executive Order immediately banning "followers of Aslan" from entering the US.  This will instantly affect talking beavers, centaurs...
Punggye-ri

North Korea piccalilli factory in full production – SHOCKING satellite images show

CHILLING satellite photographs show North Korean chemical factories are manufacturing weapons grade piccalilli in horrifying quantities. Grainy images at first sight lead viewers to think...

IRS look forward to “getting to the bottom” of Trump’s Federal Income Tax “I’m...

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Surgical glove manufacturer Sphinctoraw Inc got a surprise order for 110,000 pairs of elbow length surgical gloves from the IRS. The order was placed...

British taxpayers waste £280 million to build miniature luxury motorway on tiny island

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St Helena has just seen the completion of a spanking brand new airport... sorry motorway.  All the latest materials and construction techniques were employed to...

Theresa May summons devil to discuss Syria

The prime minister has summoned the devil to discuss the government's response to a suspected chemical weapons attack in Syria. They are expected to discuss...

Donald Trump’s staff installs 400 extra red buttons to “delay the inevitable”

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The fate of the billions of people could lie in the hands and minds of these two, often unpredictable leaders, which is a concern for many.
Trump voters deface police recruitment poster with Trump Sticker

Trump voters deface Police posters with Trump stickers

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Police Officers in Bumshart Nebrahoma were furious to discover that recruitment posters around the town had been defaced with pictures of Donald Trump. The multi-million...

Tommy Robinson begins campaign to have himself deported from Spain

Tommy Robinson has told the Spanish Government that he should be thrown out of Spain as he's a foreign criminal unable to speak Spanish. A...

Reverse-only cars to propel American manufacturing forward

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It has been revealed that the Donald Trump administration plans to revitalise America’s former manufacturing heartland – the Rust Belt – with production of...
Trump

Trump restores American faith in Bush

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Donald Trump has today been credited with restoring America's faith in Bush. Dwayne Dwight of Alabama told the Herald "I was big into Bush in...

Biff Tannen secures Republican Party presidential nomination

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The world was horrified but not terribly surprised to discover this morning that professional gambler and self-styled American oligarch Biff Tannen secured the US...

J K Rowling denies seven figure sum to write ‘President Trump and the White...

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Other proposed titles in the series are, ‘Vladimir Putting and the Half Brained President’, ‘Donnie Trump and the Gob of Fire and Fury’, ‘President Trump and the Prisoner of Asshat’, ‘Donald Trump and the Magic Revolving Door of Power’ and ‘Donald in the Competition to be Crazier than North Korea’.
Russophobia

Russia accuse Boris of hysterical Russophobia

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Russia has responded to Boris Johnson's accusations of war crimes by counter-accusing the British government and Boris in particular of 'Russophobia.' Despite what one may...

PG tips bribery scandal uncovered as Tim Farron makes ‘put the kettle on’ jibe

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In the wake of the Leaders debate on the BBC, it has been alleged that lib dem leader Tim Farron was paid a substantial amount...

If everyone had nukes we’d all be safe, says Kim Jong-un

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Following the awful Las Vegas massacre, the Great Leader of North Korea has barrelled into the ensuing gun control debate. His message came through...

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