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Police were called by the bigwigs at Channel 5 today to have self proclaimed journalist and all round twat Tommy Robinson removed from outside the Big Brother household at around 6pm this evening for...

Local man Geoff Addy was out partying in Rochdale's premier night club, Kokos, on Saturday for his mate John Bullington's abortion party, when he was arrested for possession of the Class A drug cocaine. However...

The Duchess of Sussex Megan Markle has today given birth to a healthy child after a quick labour. Prince Harry is reported as delighted, as is his Great-Grandfather, Prince Philip, who is reportedly over the...

A spokesman for Donald Trump has announced that the eagerly anticipated Trump autobiography is set for release in early December just in time for Christmas. The book, titled "My Struggle" will focus largely on his...

Details leaked from an article due to be published in the Daily Mail show plans to bulldoze the famous neolithic landmark to make way for a place of worship for Salisbury Plain's burgeoning Muslim...

The government has voted to reject a bill that recognises that hunt saboteurs are humans who feel pain and emotion. Following an incident over the weekend during which a horrible toff on a horse thrashed...

Princess Diana's body is to be exhumed and hung on a gibbet outside Buckingham Palace to commemorate the 20th anniversary of the last witch-hunt in Britain. The key text for the DUP's policy is Daemonologie,...

A survey of very cute little dogs has discovered that almost 99.9% of them are in fact savage little bastards. The survey which was carried out by Which Pet magazine has proven conclusively that all...

There was despair throughout the Conservative Party today after government officials announced that the annual Christmas do has been cancelled. The news comes after many months of negotiations between Downing Street and Marston's Brewery collapsed...

Nigel Farage has responded to criticism from Andrew Neill that Brexit Party no longer has a reason to exist following their total annihilation in the exit polls in the General Election by saying it isn't all...

Local Brexit voter, Steve Dickinson, is said to be furious with Manchester Golf Club after discovering he can't get the tee off times he wants since letting his membership lapse.

A country that has a really serious problem with deranged lunatics buying really big guns and shooting dozens of strangers has publicly said it has "no idea' how to solve the problem. "We just have...

The political right, bigots, misogynists, anti-feminists and liars across the country united yesterday, to fully embrace political correctness, after the opposition leader was accused of calling a stupid woman a "stupid woman". It is unclear...

Foxes across the UK have voted in favour of repealing the 2004 fox hunting ban, following a Government promise to issue them with 'iconic' passports in a colour of their choice. Just over 51% of...

Boris Johnson has once again found himself under fire due to comments he made likening women who wear Burqas and Niqabs in appearance to a letterbox. The comments have been met with disapproval across the...

The Department of Justice has confirmed that if and when Donald Trump is indicted for colluding with Russia during the 2016 Presidential election he will have to stand trial as an adult. The U.S. Department...