Arsehole starts fight and loses, man he started fight with arrested

0
A dickhead has died in a karmic avalanche after breaking into the home of a 78 year old.
hummus

Northern supermarket to trial hummus

0
News is breaking that a well-known northern supermarket is to start selling hummus at some stores at some point in 2021. It is thought that...

Meet the UK’s First Islamic Lollipop Lady… And it’s not what you think

13
Meet veteran lollipop lady Gillian Duffy. Gillian has become an institution in Rochdale and one of the country’s most decorated and experienced lollipop ladies. For more than 30 years she has worked for the council escorting children across the road and now she has a new honour, she is the UK’s first Sharia Law compliant lollipop lady

Donald Trump tweets that he was going to be asked to marry Harry but...

0
Donald Trump has sensationally tweeted that Prince Harry was going to ask him to marry him. POTUS explained on social media yesterday that he...
Zizzi

Yulia Skripal leaves Zizzi’s Salisbury 1 star TripAdvisor review

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Yulia Skripal has left her first TripAdvisor review since being poisoned last month. Ms Skripal said, "I was in the country visiting my father in...

Men warned not to date clever & pretty girls who might get “a bit...

55
A Judge has warned men that they only have themselves to blame if they date very clever, very pretty girls who are "a bit...
Kuenssberg

Theresa May hires Laura Kuenssberg as political analyst

0
Laura Kuenssberg thrilled her BBC colleagues this evening by announcing she was leaving Aunty to work full time for Theresa May as a political...
Michael Gove

Plan to put Michael Gove in Wicker Man on Saddleworth Moor receives cross party...

0
It's been revealed that a plan to put Michael Gove in a Wicker man on Saddleworth Moor has gained cross party approval and could...
Elmer Fudd

Elmer Fudd resigns as Home Secretary

0
The Home Secretary Elmer Fudd has resigned, Downing Street has said. Mr Fudd, was due to make a Commons Statement on Monday about the Windrush...

IKEA announce new post Brexit home-ware range

0
Swedish furniture and home-ware giant IKEA have announced that it plans tolaunch a new range of "post Brexit furniture and home-ware" to suit the...

Rescue Workers Call Off Search for Theresa May’s Credibility

50
Rescue workers hunting through the wreckage of Theresa May's career have called off the search for the remains of her credibility. They made the...
Kitten lab

Earth isn’t flat, cats would have pushed everything off edge by now if it...

0
Scientists around the World have finally conceded that the Earth is most probably not a completely flat disc after all. Research conducted at the University...

Corbyn criticised over links to NWA

2
Controversial Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn has been heavily criticised for his links to rap group NWA. A picture of Jeremy "terrorists are my mates" Corbyn sipping gin and juice with rapper Easy E has been largely shared across social media.
Cyclist

Bloke with shaved legs and huge collection of children’s toys denies mid-life crisis

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A Bloke with shaved legs and huge collection of children's toys denies mid-life crisis. A forty two year old man from Rochdale who shaves his...
Boris Johnson

Leave means Leave says Boris Johnson’s Girlfriend

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Boris Johnson's girlfriend has apparently told a befuddled Boris Johnson that leave means leave during a heated row at her flat in the early...
Wasps

Wasps are little shits, confirm scientists

50
After years of study, it has finally been confirmed by scientists from the Special Training Institute North Grimsby, that wasps serve no useful purpose...

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