Leave means Leave says Boris Johnson’s Girlfriend
Boris Johnson's girlfriend has apparently told a befuddled Boris Johnson that leave means leave during a heated row at her flat in the early...
Sixty grand on four wheel drive for one off drive to work in snow...
A man has confirmed that his choice of Audi Quattro was justified by the recent inclement weather.
Chris Lupton spent most of the morning in...
Northern woman puts heating on
A woman from the North of England has shocked the country by putting the heating on in October.
Denise Dufite, originally from the northern town...
Lord Sugar to humiliate 18 tossers in annual quest to find nation’s biggest twat
Hairy scrotum faced narcissist and entrepreneur, Lord Sugar, has launched his annual challange to find the UK's biggest arsehole after himself.
The one time Klingon...
Melania did not have sex with horrible old men for money admits Daily Mail
The Daily Mail have gone on the record today to say that Melania Trump did not and never has had sex with any horrible...
Scottish government urged to act as Edinburgh chip shop caught selling deep-fried HEROIN
Health campaigners in Scotland have urged the SNP government to take immediate action after an Edinburgh chip shop was found to be selling deep-fried...
Northerner brings Kraft Slices to cheese and wine party in Surrey
A disgraced Northerner has been barred from ever returning to the South, after he humiliated his sister at a bourgeoisie Cheese & Wine evening...
College Professor assaults Trump supporter
A college professor in the US has come under fire from leading figures in the Republican Party after he allegedly assaulted a number of...
First year student can’t wait to get home to tell her pony all about...
A first year student at the University of Bristol is said to be very excited about getting home for Christmas so she can tell...
Corbyn tells press conference if you strike me down I will become more powerful...
Following Theresa May's unsurprising announcement of a snap general election, Jeremy Corbyn has made a press statement.
Stood in front of a dozen media representatives he said;
"We...
UK’s youngest Brexit voter has died aged seventy three
We met in a small cafe in Westminster. A reporter for the Rochdale Herald and Britain's youngest Brexit supporter. Shining another glass to make...
Jeremy Corbyn demands General Election so voters can choose between Brexit or Brexit
Jeremy Corbyn has demanded that the Government call a General Election in order that the public can choose between his insane version of Brexit...
Middle class parents convert to Satanism after local cult school gets glowing Ofsted report
Local couple Rupert and Penelope Mills have reportedly converted to Satanism in order to get their children into the local cult school after it...
Prince Harry to marry woman he is barely related to
Prince Harry is breaking with Royal protocol by marrying an American actress he is barely related to.
Kensington Palace are said to be disturbed saying...
Get fit and beat inflation with subsistence farming and foraging, Top Tory tells poor
Tory ministers are expected to announce a three part plan to tackle obesity and food inflation later this week.
Deselecting MPs implicated in electoral fraud before election “Hadn’t occurred to me” claims PM
The Prime Minister claims the possible loss of up to twenty MPs from a working majority of seventeen in the run-up to Brexit is...
