FA launch tactical nuclear strike at semi-final of Women’s Euro 2017
The Football Association has long been implacably opposed to the rise of the women’s game. When it first got popular, the FA acted swiftly and banned it in 1921. However, with the rise of...
USA accused of cheating at Rock, Paper, Scissors – ‘It’s just not cricket’ says...
The world of sport was outraged yesterday when Team USA was accused of cheating at the Rock, Paper, Scissors Test Match.
If the result stands, the outcome could be devastating for the home side.
The bi-annual...
Private school fury as ‘dirty pints’ banned for 16 year old rugby players
Plans to ban the enforced necking of dirty pints for under 16s rugby players have been widely criticised.
The ruling by HSE is thought to have followed on from the proposed banning of...
Konta tipped to be “a solid 6” when John Inverdale’s 2017 Sexist Gaffes are...
Finals Weekend at The Championships in Wimbledon is fast approaching and that can only mean one thing…the eagerly awaited 2017 Sexist Gaffes list from John Inverdale.
Inverdale, the 59 year old and formerly respected sports...
FIFA rejects World Cup draw rigging allegations after Russia selected to play against Russia
FIFA have been forced to defend more allegations of corruption after the 2018 World Cup hosts, Russia, were selected to play against themselves in the group stages.
The event saw Gary Lineker and Russian presenter...
Cricketers injured as dyslexic Anarchists riot at T20
Two Yorkshire cricketers and a number of spectators were injured last night as nearly 200 dyslexic anarchists rioted at the T20.
Similar riots took place in Mumbai in India and Perth in Australia as the...
Olympics cancelled. To be replaced by international Fortnite tournament.
Reports are emerging that the International Olympic Committee has convened to discuss cancelling this year's summer Olympics.
The report, which comes to The Rochdale Herald from sports correspondent Veranda Barbecue, details plans to call off...
New dementia awareness campaign just GB cycling doctor trying to remember what drugs he’s...
Using drugs that are not banned but enhance performance is definitely not cheating." That's what head of British cycling Zammo Maguire says today.
McGuire was speaking after a Parliamentary report was released on alleged doping....
BT and Sky TV will not allow Nuclear Winter Premiership break
Sky TV and BT TV have both announced that the current Premier League TV rights deal precludes top-tier football a break in the event of nuclear winter.
Currently, other leagues around Europe have scheduled a...
Football players saving us all by not taking a pay cut
The Professional Footballers Association have warned that a 30% cut in their members' wages would damage the NHS as it would reduce the amount of tax revenue the national purse received.
Seriously.
They actually said this.
The...
Newcastle United fans looking forward to renewed access to match pies and beer
The Toon Army are rejoicing following the news that Sports Direct Entrepreneur Sweat Shop owner, Mike Ashley, is to sell the Magpies.
Realising that he is losing money hand-over-fist due to being unable get any...
Trump Demands IOC Accept Extreme Vetting Into Next Olympics
Merkin-topped braggart and presidential candidate Donald Trump is demanding that extreme vetting become an accepted Olympic sport.
Although media have interpreted his remarks on extreme vetting as a call for immigration control on brown people,...
Paul Dacre hospitalised with stress after English Muslim cricketer wins man of the match...
Caught between "Moeen Ali spins England to victory!" and "Fury as Muslim immigrant takes YOUR place in the ENGLAND cricket team", the Daily Mail's editor was admitted to hospital suffering from advanced Editorial Conflictitis.
The...
England team reveal plan to completely disappoint everyone is going smoothly
Gareth Southgate has revealed that his plan to completely disappoint loads of English people is going exactly according to plan.
At a press conference Southgate said, "Expectations for this tournament were so low when we...
God shows that he hates Cristiano Ronaldo and Argentina
God has revealed that he absolutely cannot stand Cristiano Ronaldo so he chose to favour Uruguay in yesterday's last 16 game.
God or, The Word as he prefers to be known took time from his...
Just £300,000 a month can feed a footballer for a whole week. Please give...
It can be harrowing, truly tragic to see, to see a young, athletic, talented man to have to survive in squalid conditions, living on less than you paid for your house.
That is why we...
